Clarity On Fire



Clarity on Fire is a podcast for people who know what they DONT want out of their life and career, but arent sure what theyd RATHER be doing. We're Kristen and Rachel, two best friends from college and certified life coaches who are here to help you cut through the information overload, get unstuck, and focus not JUST on how you can have a career youre passionate about, but how to create a whole LIFE that feels fulfilling. In a world where its easy to exist but hard to feel alive, we want you to experience the relief of knowing that YES, youre allowed to want more out of your life and career. And NO, you dont have to wander through the dark anymore. Our job is to light the fire that shows you the way.


  • Blog: Why you shouldn’t always trust advice from experts

    26/03/2019 Duración: 16min

    I was sitting on the floor with my 4-month-old black lab puppy in my lap, sobbing. She was happily chewing a bone, oblivious to the fact that I was heartbroken because I was planning to give her away. Scarlett, my puppy, was a bit of a hellion. She had a habit of attacking your feet when you weren’t looking, and she would bark at you for what felt like hours without stopping. She didn’t care for kids, or scooters, or skateboards, or anything that darted around in an unpredictable fashion. If you rolled her over on her back, she would shriek and fight like a chimpanzee being murdered (I swear I’m not exaggerating. I have witnesses!). This dog was nothing like the sweet, loving, cuddly puppy I had imagined. She was completely unmanageable. So obviously I brought in professional help. The dog trainer who came to my apartment only visited a few times before she pointed at Scarlett, who had been busy attacking my feet again, and said, “That is NOT normal. You will never be able to trust this dog. She’ll have to we

  • Permission to pivot (in your life & career) with Marissa Burdett

    22/03/2019 Duración: 01h01min

    Some of you are probably very familiar with the unique stress of being at a career crossroads. You feel called to make a change, but you’re overwhelmed with fears and hang-ups—Is it even possible to go in a new direction? What will people think of me if I do?? What if I make zero dollars and end up back at square one?! (Cue standing frozen at the intersection like a deer in headlights). That’s why we sat down with our friend and fellow coach, Marissa Burdett, to talk about how to move through your fear of making a major pivot. We covered: What to do when you’re afraid that leaving your job will mean letting down your parents/boss/co-workers. Why it’s totally possible (and never too late) to transition to a creative profession. Why the idea that you need to have a side hustle or personal brand is totally wrong. The fear of not being good enough at something to make a career out of it. What to do if you think you’ll need to take a massive pay cut or go into debt in order to make a career pivot. After you’ve l

  • Blog: How to avoid small talk & have deeper conversations

    19/03/2019 Duración: 14min

    I don’t know if it’s my face (whatever the opposite of ‘resting bitch face’ is, I have that) or my overall demeanor or what, but I must have an invisible sign hanging around my neck that says, “Hello stranger! Please strike up a conversation with me.” This happens to me everywhere, including (no kidding) while I’m changing in the women’s locker room at the gym. I can’t even avoid it when I’m half-dressed! The other day at yoga, I was in a crappy mood and I actively tried to put off a “don’t talk to me” vibe because I just wanted to be left alone. Three women separately approached me after class to strike up a conversation. I had to laugh. So I give up! I accept that this is just the way I am. And mostly, I don’t mind it so much. I like hearing people’s stories (I mean, it’s what my entire job is centered around, after all!), and I’ve met some really cool people because of this superpower/curse of mine. The only real problem is that I hate small talk. Having endless polite, surface-level, meaningless conversat

  • Side Chat: When you want to fix someone, but can’t

    15/03/2019 Duración: 54min

    This one goes out to all of the caring, compassionate, empathetic, concerned people who just want to help others. Especially if, in your altruistic mindset, you deeply believe that you know what’s best for someone, and that if they’d only listen to you, you’d be able to solve all their problems. Dudes, from a couple of (recovering) fixers, YOU GOTTA CUT THAT OUT. In this month’s Side Chat, we’re getting in to what to do when you want to fix someone, but can’t. We talked about: The ways (including the less-than-obvious ones) that the compulsion to “fix” can show up. How people-pleasing and being a highly sensitive person relate to the desire to fix others. Why over-giving and over-doing tend to backfire in spectacular fashion. Why letting people struggle is often the kindest thing you can do for them. Better ways to respond to someone who needs fixing, and how to encourage people to change in a way that actually works. After you’ve listened, leave a comment to let us know how called-out you feel, and which p

  • Blog: What to do when you’re bored with life

    12/03/2019 Duración: 17min

    Last month we got a Dear Krachel question from Kate, who asked: “What do you do when you're bored with life? Job, relationships, everything seems like such a drag.” Well, Kate, I see your Dear Krachel question and raise you an entire blog post (I have no idea how to play poker, but I’m all in on this question). I’ve personally been bored with life many times (and to a degree, STILL feel bored with a few aspects of life that feel stubbornly unchanging). So, do we blow everything up and start over? Wait for inspiration to strike? And is being bored with life OK, or is it problematic? I’m diving into that, as well as sharing my best ideas for how to bring your life back to, um, life in this week’s brand-new blog. After you’ve listened, leave a comment and share which of my approaches you suspect is the most accurate for you, and what ideas you have for banishing boredom. LAST DAY TO TAKE THE SURVEY! Thanks in advance for taking our short survey! Anyone who completes it by 11:59pm EST TODAY, March 12, 2019, will

  • Change your bad habits (& get over your fear of failure) with Jessica Binder

    08/03/2019 Duración: 01h08min

    I knew Jes was a soul sister the moment she told me that, as a kid in gym class, she was the one who couldn’t pass the presidential fitness test. You know that rope attached to the ceiling? The one other kids shimmy up and down easily? Yeah, she was the sad kid hanging at the bottom. (As a tween who couldn’t even pass the sit-and-reach, this resonated at the core of my being). So, how does that kid—the one whose childhood diet consisted of white bread, butter, cheese, and Pepsi; who never saw an avocado until she was in college and pronounced “quinoa” wrong for years—become a personal trainer, health coach, and habit change specialist? I dug into that, and lots more, with Jes Binder in this month’s interview with a normal person. We talked about: Why she didn’t initially think it was possible quit her job and start her own business. How she got over the fear of doing something “abnormal,” in a small town where no one had ever heard of a health coach. How someone who “wasn’t even a natural at drinking water”

  • Blog: Should I go back to grad school or not?

    05/03/2019 Duración: 16min

    I want to start this by outing myself as an absolute school nerd. As in, I used to “assign” myself summer book reports in elementary and middle school. I would gladly be an eternal student — if I could get paid just to go to school and learn for the rest of my life, I’d be in heaven. So when I hear my clients saying things like, “I’m not really sure what I’m passionate about or what kind of career I want, so I’m thinking about going back to grad school to figure it out,” I’ll admit that my first split-second reaction is, “Yeah, school!” But even I have to admit that going back to grad school isn’t always the right answer to the question, “What am I supposed to do with my life?” To be honest, more often than not, I see people going back to grad school simply because they don't know what else to do. Plenty of people use grad school as a way of feeling productive and directed, when unconsciously it’s just a way of postponing the scary step of figuring things out in the “real world.” So how can you tell if more e

  • Dear Krachel: Should I do a job I hate for a few years (for the money)?

    01/03/2019 Duración: 37min

    Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, a monthly advice segment where we answer audience questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself. On this episode, we’re answering questions from: Broke Girl, who deeply fears becoming a “slave to work,” but she has a ton of debt to pay off. Should she keep her freedom (but not make much money), or suck it up and do something she hates for a few years to pay off debt? Frustrated Firestarter, who fears she’s a “dilettante;” a dabbler who loves variety and can’t seriously commit to anything. Does she need a little tough love so she’ll finally focus, or is this not actually a problem? The Forever Student, who’d sign up in a heartbeat if being a student was a paid profession. No “real” job has ever interested her as much as school, so what’s a girl to do? Should she get (yet another) degree or submit to a job in the real world? After you’ve listened, leave us a comment to l

  • Blog: How to tell, once and for all, whether you're an introvert or extrovert

    26/02/2019 Duración: 19min

    Pardon me while I dust off my soapbox and get fired up about something (Ha! As if my soapbox ever gets dusty…). I’ve got a bone to pick when it comes to introverts and extroverts. There’s a huge misconception about what both of those words mean, and I used to fall prey to it. In fact, I spent a big chunk of my life feeling like I was broken because of how widespread this false interpretation is. For some reason, we’ve gotten the idea that being an introvert means that you’re shy. A wallflower. Quiet. Hesitant to share your opinions. Demure. And on the other hand, we assume that being an extrovert makes you loud, outgoing, talkative, and opinionated. So, because I’m loud and opinionated and not particularly concerned with what others think of me, most people are surprised to find out that I’m not an extrovert. I’m actually a huge introvert. But they shouldn’t be surprised at all. Because that’s not what it means to be introverted or extroverted. Quite simply, introversion and extroversion are about where you d

  • Navigating a toxic workplace with Stacy Campesi

    22/02/2019 Duración: 01h17min

    This is one of those conversations that’s going to be applicable to 99.9% of you, because who hasn’t experienced a toxic workplace at some point in their life?? Whether you’re a college student folding clothes at the mall or a Senior VP at a large firm, toxicity ABOUNDS—In the form of cattiness, disengagement, resentment, and groupthink, to name a few culprits. It’s about time we tackled this subject, so we invited Stacy Campesi, one of our very best friends, to share her well-earned advice about how to navigate a toxic work environment. We talked about: The relationship between toxic workplaces and “good girl syndrome” Why “toxic” is a misused word, and why using it makes the problem worse How we can identify an unhealthy environment ahead of time, before we ever make a commitment When to stick it out, and when it’s OK to bail What steps YOU can take to improve your environment, based on what Stacy has seen work for herself and her clients After you’ve listened, leave a comment to let us know how Stacy’s a

  • Blog: Why selflessness doesn’t make you a good person

    19/02/2019 Duración: 15min

    A client of mine, Molly, is burnt out. She’s got two jobs that have her working at least 50 hours a week (usually more like 60-65), including night and weekend shifts. Sometimes after working 6 days in a row, her boss will ask if she can fill in for someone on the 7th day … and she usually agrees, even though it means she doesn’t get a single day off in a week. She’s also involved in multiple social groups, and she gets roped into helping plan and coordinate events, even when she can’t make it to the event (because she’s working so much). I pointed out that this is not a sustainable pace, and she fully acknowledges that. She’s constantly sleep-deprived, and her naturally sunny personality is slowly being replaced by a grumpy, snippy, unmotivated person who she barely recognizes. Molly knows that something’s got to give, but whenever she considers backing out of a commitment or saying no or taking something off her very-full plate, she becomes consumed by guilt. Recently she told me, “I really wanted to tell m

  • Side Chat: “I’m not enough” vs. “I’m too much”

    15/02/2019 Duración: 50min

    We doubt there’s a person on earth (well, maybe excluding the sociopaths who walk among us) that doesn’t feel that they’re either “too much” or “not enough.” You know what we’re talking about: “You’re too quiet. You’re not interesting enough. You’re too weird. You’re too intense. You’re not attractive enough.” We’ve all got a silent-but-insistent inner monologue that’s terrified we aren’t EXACTLY who we need to be in order to be liked, loved, and respected. In this month’s Side Chat, we’re coming at this from opposite ends of the spectrum and meeting in the middle: Kristen shares her experience with feeling “not enough.” Rachel talks about how she’s always identified as “too much.” We break down where this comes from and why all we do it. And we get in to how to let this deep-seated fear go, as well as how we personally stopped buying in to those fears. After you’ve listened, leave a comment to let us know whether you resonate as “not enough” or “too much,” and what parts of this episode stuck with you the

  • Blog: How to tell the difference between self-loathing & tough love

    12/02/2019 Duración: 15min

    I once knew somebody who was excellent at deluding herself. Her M.O. was to spend many thousands of dollars every year (money she certainly didn’t have) on courses and personal development programs and fancy wellness retreats in Europe. What was pretty genius was that it was easy to justify pulling out the credit card for these things because, on the surface, they all looked like really positive, empowering, self-loving investments. But she often came back without much to show for her investment, and would quickly jump into the next pricey course or event. So … is that the most loving thing she could have done for herself? I’m obviously skeptical. I could make the case that a better route would have been not to dig herself deeper into debt year by year in an attempt to find self-love and self-acceptance. Maybe the tougher, but more compassionate, approach would have been to take a good hard look at how she was spending her money, and find a more cost-effective and less glamorous way of caring for herself. (A

  • Moving past the worst years of your life with Lauren Mowbray

    08/02/2019 Duración: 01h04min

    A little over 10 years ago, Lauren’s life was thrown into total chaos. Her relationship ended in a shocking, dramatic, and heartbreaking way, and she found herself a single mom to four kids, barely getting by while trying to navigate an intense emotional rollercoaster. In the years since then, she’s gone through multiple stages of redefining herself, first through external factors (her struggle, her titles, and her accomplishments), and later by going inward to figure out who she is at her core, when all the external stuff is stripped away. Lauren will be the first to tell you that she’s still a work-in-progress (as we all are!), but she’s come a long way in building a life that’s filled with lots more peace, love, support, and faith than she ever thought would be possible for her. She’s sharing her story and some of the wisdom she’s gained along the way in today’s interview with a normal person. Listen in as Lauren and Kristen talk about… How to process the grief, shame, and utter overwhelm that threatens t

  • Bonus episode! How to find your passion in 2019 live workshop

    05/02/2019 Duración: 01h06min

    Instead of a new blog this week, we’re doing something special that we’ve never done before — releasing our latest live workshop as a bonus podcast episode! Technically the video replay of this episode expired last Friday, but we’re giving it a second life on the podcast. So if you didn’t get a chance to watch it the first time around, then you’re in luck! This workshop was called “How to find your passion in 2019,” but in hindsight we really wish we could have named it “The Amorphous Golden Blob.” You’ll find out why when you listen. ;) We talked about: Why so many people are both desperate to find their passion and also completely clueless about how to do it. What exactly brings on an existential crisis, and why your career is NOT an answer to that problem. What “passion” is and isn’t, and how to pursue it the RIGHT way. How to create a filter system for your life so that you can get unstuck and make decisions easily. The two major first steps you need to be taking before you try to find your passion or ma

  • Dear Krachel: I feel invisible. How do I get people to notice me?

    01/02/2019 Duración: 42min

    Welcome to another episode of Dear Krachel, a monthly advice segment where we answer audience questions about life, career, relationships, existential angst, and anything that helps you become a more whole, fulfilled version of yourself. On this episode, we’re answering questions from: Charlie, a published author who can’t get past the feeling that they should be doing something more intellectually impressive, like medicine or law. How can they get over the need to do something other people find “worthy”? Jo, who has a “pipe dream” of opening a café. All her other ideas fall short in comparison, but it doesn’t seem realistic. Is it smarter to give it up or take a stab? Jesica, who believes that no one sees her and is tired of feeling invisible. How can someone magically be seen when they’ve been wearing an invisibility cloak for so long? After you’ve listened, leave us a comment to let us know if our advice for these three listeners resonated with you, too. Want to submit a question for our March episode of

  • Blog: Here's what I know for sure is NOT the point of life

    29/01/2019 Duración: 16min

    I can’t tell you the number of times I sat hunched over a desk at some of my old jobs thinking… “What’s the point of this? What’s the point of this dumb report I’m writing? What’s the point of showing up to all of these countless meetings? What’s the point of staying here until 5:30pm every day?” And once I headed down that path of questioning … watch out! It quickly spiraled in a dramatic and existential way: “What’s the deeper meaning of any of this? What’s the point of working at all? This can’t be all, right? What are we all doing here anyway? What’s the purpose of life?” {Told you. That escalated fast. I think I missed my calling as a philosopher.} I never could come up with a sufficient answer (I mean, come on, that’s only the greatest life mystery of all time), but that never stopped my continued questioning. I wanted to feel like my time, energy, and effort meant something … like I wasn’t wasting all of this time for no good reason. I needed to see the bigger picture. If you’ve been questioning the po

  • Bust through any block with Ryan Mathie

    25/01/2019 Duración: 01h14min

    Sometimes change happens super gradually, and sometimes in lightning strikes. Ryan’s was definitely the latter. Ten years ago, on a seemingly random walk through London, Ryan Mathie experienced a profound breakdown that became a huge breakthrough. Since then he’s been incredibly motivated to help other people see how much they’re getting in their own way (like he was, pre-breakthrough), and help them set themselves free. He really LOVES busting through blocks, so we challenged him to help our listeners bust through their oldest, crustiest problems. We picked submissions from six listeners for Ryan to tackle, and he totally delivered. We got into questions like: “I sabotage every job and relationship I enter into it. How can I get out of this vicious cycle?” “How can I stop feeling guilty for saying ‘no’ and having boundaries?” “How can I overcome the fear and perfectionism that keeps me from pursuing my creativity full-out?” “Should I say in my 22-year-long marriage? Or should I call it quits?” “How do I mov

  • Blog: Do you want it? Or do you only think you SHOULD want it?

    22/01/2019 Duración: 18min

    Three years ago, I wrote this blog about things I wanted to want but didn’t actually care about. Reading it now, in 2019, was fascinating because a lot of these things I have NO energy or shame around anymore. So, what follows is my original blog from 2016, with (in the true spirit of a high school theater nerd) semi-dramatic asides from my 2019 self: I want to tell you that I’m a go-getter. I’d like for you to believe that I spend my days hustling, achieving, and generally “crushing it.”  (2019 aside: I actually DON'T want you to think this about me anymore. All of this implies that "crushing it" is the absolute pinnacle of life success, and I know now that it's so NOT). It’d be great if when you thought of me, you envisioned someone who easily and breezily works 8-10 hours a day. Someone who’s constantly on top of her inbox. Someone who has great hair and makeup and puts on real clothes and who juggles everything with a smile and a winning attitude.  (2019 aside: The number of hours you work per day is not

  • Side Chat: How to stop procrastinating

    18/01/2019 Duración: 45min

    OK, procrastinators, it’s time to face the music. (Does anyone here actually NOT procrastinate?? First of all, how dare you? And second, kindly show yourself out). It seems like everyone is forever trying to overcome procrastination. A lot of us believe that if we just read enough “life hacking” articles we can force ourselves into submission. But if you couldn’t guess, we aren’t down with that. In this month’s Side Chat, we’re talking about: When procrastination means something deeper, and when it’s not a big deal When your intuition uses procrastination to try to send you a message, and how to interpret it Using education and research as a form of sneaky procrastination When procrastination masquerades as perfectionism How you can release the pressure so you don’t feel the compulsion to procrastinate as often After you’ve listened, leave a comment to let us know how you’ve been procrastinating how this episode resonated with you! FREE WORKSHOP ON JANUARY 28! We’re hosting a free, LIVE online workshop on M

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