Psychology Of Eating

Picture this:  You’re trucking along your day – everything’s going pretty well, when BOOM: You see a picture of yourself, and you’re instantly triggered.  “Is that really what I look like?” you ask yourself.  You can’t believe your appearance. Maybe it’s extra weight, or the shape of your hips or stomach.  But whatever it is – you feel your heart start to sink, and a crushing sadness races in.  Before you know it, you’re spiraling into that incorporeal place made famous on Netflix’s acclaimed series.  (And let’s just say, it’s not “The Good Place.”)  Sound familiar?  Most of us have had the disconcerting experience of getting triggered around our weight or appearance. So in this episode, we take a special look at body image triggers, where they come from, and how to begin healing them.  You’ll hear Marc David work with 41-year old Jen on her triggers with weight and body image.  While Jen is hungering for weight loss – she’d love to lose around 40 pounds – she comes to realize in working with Marc that there’

Managing emotions with food, otherwise known as emotional eating, is something that humans have been doing for millenia. And the reason is simple: when we eat, we reliably feel better – no matter how fleeting those “feel-good” feelings may be.  While many people intuitively understand that emotions play a key role in our eating habits, it can often be a lot harder to understand the emotions themselves. The truth is, our inner emotional world is fantastically complex, and influences our relationship with food in so many diverse and fascinating ways.  Which brings us to guest coaching client Beverley, 70, whose deepest desire is to understand the “dark places” inside herself that drive her to food – and to finally bring healing to the challenging emotions she’s been feeling for over 50 years.  As Beverley shares with Marc David, she’s never really been able to understand her negative feelings, where they came from, or why she has them.  Beverley reflects that she’s had an “amazing life,” with so many blessings.

When it comes to body weight, most of us are focused on one thing: losing it! But many people aren’t prepared for what happens after weight loss.  Any thoughts we may have about post-weight loss life are pretty dreamy. We imagine we’ll feel uber confident, accomplished, and ready to boldly move forward in life.  But all too often, that simply isn’t the case.  For many, the striving and struggle for weight loss ends up getting replaced by an equally unwelcome visitor: WEIGHT WORRY. That can look like constant fear that we’ll gain the weight back, or nagging anxieties that we really should lose another few pounds.  Our food worries continue, and the voices in our head never stop criticizing. We judge our body, we shame ourselves for having body fat, and we belittle ourselves for not having absolute control over food. While weight worry might fit into that box called a “1st world problem” – it can nevertheless be pretty debilitating.  So what do we do when losing weight doesn’t stop us from worrying about weight

Night-time binge eating.  It’s a pastime that many people struggle with, and can feel truly insurmountable. But nightly binge eating doesn’t have to get the best of you.  The reality is, there’s a clear road to recovering our power and being in control with food – all that’s needed is a deeper understanding of why nighttime binge eating – otherwise known as “nighttime eating syndrome” – happens, and a wise framework for overcoming it. In this episode, we meet guest coaching client, Megan, who would like to finally break free from this challenging nighttime habit.  As a former fitness competitor, Megan spent many years on a low-calorie diet. Eating only 1,200 calories a day, and exercising extremely hard, Megan would find herself ravenous at night. And this would inevitably lead to giving into unwanted cravings – and heavy duty self-rejection. Years later, Megan is no longer competing, and isn’t so restrictive with her diet. She eats well, and takes care of her body. And yet, she hasn’t been able to kick her n

Like so many of us, Cherie, age 56, wants to lose 20 pounds – but without the constant fight and struggle. Cherie has been battling these 20 pounds just about all her adult life – and she’s feeling ready for a new approach. Cherie’s kids are about to leave the house, and she’d like to focus on her life for the first time in many years. She dreams of letting go of her day job and taking on an exciting new career, and she knows that now’s the time to step into her power. Everything is falling into place for Cherie to take a big leap in life.  But her weight continues to weigh her down. In this week’s episode, Marc David coaches Cherie to finally have a breakthrough with her weight. And it’s all about focusing on this one weight loss secret: ➡️ Becoming a natural eater. You see, Cherie has been a rather *unnatural* eater. Since age 13 when she was a young gymnast, her life revolved around working out, looking trim, having very little body fat, and winning the approval of others. For young Cherie, food quickly be

Raelene, 46, would love to lose about 40 kilos. And she’s had great success in the past: all she has to do is eliminate sugar, cut down on the carbs, watch her calories and portion sizing, and the weight will eventually come off.  But the problem is, she just can’t seem to stick to a diet plan for more than a few months.   A cooking teacher and mother of two, Raelene says she simply doesn’t have the discipline to stick with it. And after 15 years of off-and-on-again dieting, Raelene still hasn’t reached the promised land – and like so many of us, is pretty frustrated and confused about what to do.  This is clearly a conundrum.  She knows what she needs to do, but she just doesn’t have the discipline to do it.  In this episode, Marc David helps Raelene realize something important:  Diagnosing the cause of her weight challenges as a lack of self-discipline is misplaced. And we know that to be true, in part, because her many years of trying to simply muster more discipline hasn’t been working. Discipline by itse

Barbara, 60, is finally ready to explore the world, go on adventures, and find the man of her dreams. She’s done lots of therapy, read all the books, and it seems like nothing should be in the way. But something is clearly holding her back.   A lifetime of dieting and disliking her body, and a string of unfortunate dating experiences in the past has her majorly doubting herself. Barbara so deeply wants to move on and create the life she feels like she’s long overdue for – but there’s part of her that is having a really hard time trusting that it’s possible.  For all of us who struggle with weight and body image, this can be an all-too familiar story.  What do we do when we’re ready to embrace life, but we feel held back by negative constructs about our body, our weight, and our past? How do we heal patterns that have been around for decades? And how do we find trust in life when we’ve been previously hurt?   In this episode, Marc David identifies some of the hidden forces at work that are driving Barbara’s co

If you’ve been dieting for many years, you know it can get to be a little “much.” Chronic dieting can leave us frustrated, exhausted, and exasperated. Why does something so simple – weight loss – have to be so hard?  Millions of people around the world are realizing that they’re just plain tired of dieting. So much so that an increasing number of people are deciding to take a break from weight loss altogether.   But taking a diet break doesn’t alleviate the very real fear that many of us experience: that the second we stop dieting, we’re going to gain weight.   In this episode, Marc David works with Stephanie, 47, who has taken a 1-year break from weight loss – but has gained a stone (about 14 pounds) during that time, and is afraid she’ll only gain more.   Nevertheless, she’s given herself this time to move away from “weight loss at all costs” to approaching her weight from a mindset perspective, and doing all the reading and learning she can from self-help experts like Dr. Kristin Neff and Brene Brown.   As

Emotional eating always has a psychological or biological reason for showing up in our life. It never just “happens” … it’s almost always an unconscious psychological strategy to regulate difficult emotions.  That’s the case for guest coaching client, Katy, who’s going through a period of massive change – and is struggling to manage her feelings about it all. As a newly-turned 30-year old, Katy is figuring out what’s important to her in life, what sort of career she wants to pursue, and how she wants to earn money. She’s hoping to find a life partner, and would one day like to become a mother.  And all this great change is bringing up major uncertainty, as well as feelings of anxiety, fear, and self-doubt.  Amidst all of this, Katy has been experiencing on-off cycles of emotional eating, overeating, and body judgment. She wishes her food habits didn’t feel like such a roller coaster ride, and that she could just feel consistently joyful and positive about her relationship with food and her body. But as Marc D

It’s no surprise that many people around the world would like to lose weight. In fact, between 2017 and 2021, 55% of all Americans have expressed the desire for weight loss. And unfortunately, many people who are single and would like to find love in their life are instead putting it off until they’re at their desired weight.  That’s the case for 41-year old Shawnna, our guest in this episode of the podcast.  Shawnna would like to lose about 50 pounds, and find a more peaceful relationship with food – one where she’s not constantly thinking about what, when, and how much to eat. As she shares, she’s tired of feeling like food and her weight is holding her back from following her dreams, including finding a significant other.  But despite her best efforts, Shawnna has struggled over the last decade to not see her weight as one of the most important aspects of life to overcome.   She’s tried every approach she knows to lose weight. And she’s tried everything to try to forget about her weight, move on, and have

In this episode of The Psychology of Eating Podcast, we’re going to take a look at why we need to get past the label of ‘body dysmorphia’ – a medical term – and instead look to understand why body dysmorphia is actually present. And to do that, we must explore our personal story from childhood to adulthood – because our history contains the clues for where this pattern developed in the first place. The reality is, many of us have dysmorphic tendencies. Meaning, we see our body differently than it actually is – and not in a good way. That’s the case for Rory, 62, who reports struggling with body dysmorphia since childhood. As he shares with Marc David, he’s never had a problem controlling what he eats. He’s been able to maintain his body fat at 8-10% consistently since his 20s through extreme sports and rigid dieting.  But none of his efforts ever feel like enough. Rory’s body hate runs so deep that he avoids mirrors and glass windows so he doesn’t see his reflection. In his mind, he wishes he had the body of

We all have different reasons for wanting to lose weight: Feeling lighter  Being healthier Fitting into your “skinny” clothes Or sometimes, just feeling more confident… And sometimes, there are hidden reasons for wanting to lose weight that we don’t even realize we have. For Nataliya, 46, weight loss has been a lifelong journey. Nataliya wants to be more confident in her body, and to feel lighter. She jokes that her goal is to feel “like a squirrel” and be able to jump from branch to branch. But what she doesn’t quite realize is that her desire to feel lighter is driven by a part of her that’s thinking some “heavy thoughts.” And as Marc David explains, those heavy thoughts are all about her resistance to something that so many of us would like to avoid: ===> Aging.  Even though she is youthful, has a young child, a great marriage, and is in good health, Nataliya is starting to feel older – and her unwanted weight is just one more reminder of the aging process. She finds herself often longing for the body sh

The desire to lose weight unites so many people around the world. And while it may be a common global phenomenon … what’s not frequently recognized is how unique all of our weight loss journeys turn out to be. The truth is, if we want to lose weight and keep it off, we need to intimately understand our life story and how it affects our journey with weight. In this episode of The Psychology of Eating Podcast, you’ll meet Wendy, 57. She’s been on a strugglesome journey to lose weight. And one thing that particularly stands out in Wendy’s life story is the prominent role a particular archetype has been playing all these years: Her Inner Child. Each and every one of us has an “inner child” – which you can think of as an archetype – or “voice” or “personality” that shows up in different parts of our life. Here are some descriptions of the child within us: Our Inner Child wants immediate gratification. It loves pleasure and fun. It’s a part of us that’s very innocent and naive. Notably, the Inner Child does

In this episode, Marc David works with Richard, 72, who is living in a constant state of vigilance when it comes to his weight and health.  Like so many of us, Richard has developed a belief that his diet must be perfect in order to maintain his health, avoid illness, and keep weight off. And what happens if he can’t maintain the perfect diet? The moment Richard gains a pound, he imagines that he’s just around the corner from a heart attack. He believes that if he doesn’t eat 100% perfectly all the time and at every meal, then his family history of arteriosclerosis will instantly catch up to him. On top of that, Richard has an intense fear of gaining weight … having bounced back and forth between extreme weight gains and losses starting in his early twenties. He acknowledges that his lifelong challenges with weight were born from his early struggles with dyslexia, learning disabilities, and childhood feelings of isolation.  So even though Richard is a mature, successful and healthy 72-year old man, he simply

When it comes to weight loss, so many of us feel that we need to restrict our food, punish the body with exercise, and be in a constant state of worry. We expect our weight loss journey to be an ongoing battle where we can never truly relax and live. But there’s a much better way. In this episode, Marc David works with guest podcast client David, and challenges the belief that weight and health goals have to be difficult. At age 74, David wants to lose weight and eat healthy, but he’s tired of all the hard work.  He knows what he wants, but he’s confused about how to get there.  David would like to enjoy food and not live in a state of restriction, but at the same time, he wishes he could be 40 pounds lighter. Fed up by the cycle of working hard to lose weight, and then gaining it right back, David wonders:  “Can’t I just be me? When do I get to just live my life?” Listen in as they explore the power of cultivating a more natural and easy relationship with food and body. Instead of punishing the body into wei

So many of us are trying to lose weight.  We can put all of our energy, our heart and soul, into fulfilling what seems like a simple desire - just lose a bunch of body fat. When our efforts aren’t working though, things can get complicated. We can become a bit anxious, and adopt the kind of beliefs that are intended to motivate us, but actually hold us back. These beliefs can include:  I’m not good enough as I am I am not lovable Something is wrong with Once I lose the weight, then and only then can I finally be happy If I just work harder, then the weight will come off When we think such thoughts, oddly enough, the body itself does not feel safe.  And when the body doesn’t feel safe, our physiology tends to hold onto weight. That’s the dilemma Marc David helps our guest coaching client Carrie untangle in this episode. After a recent weight loss, Carrie feels conflicted about the praise and positive comments she receives from the people around her. Far from feeling validated by the feedback, it se

When it comes to weight, many people can identify with the concept of “weight extremism” – otherwise known as yo-yo dieting.  We’re “all in” with our health commitments, whether that’s daily exercise, a healthy diet, getting to bed early every night. We analyze, assess – and maybe even obsess about – every little morsel of food we put into our mouth. And then, well – life happens. Tragedy happens. Stress happens.  Our habits start to unravel, and before we know it: our healthy lifestyle is kaput. We’re secret-eating in the dark and binge eating when we think no one is looking.  The weight starts to creep back up, and before we know it, our weight has swung widely to the other side of the spectrum.  And every bite of food is accompanied by terrible, self-attacking thoughts like, “I’m so disgusting. I can’t believe I’m doing this again, I can’t stand who I’ve become.”   As Marc David explores in this episode, the extremist mentality can go way beyond the realms of food and body.  But in every case, our extremis

Food is so much more than just fuel for our bodies. It’s also a powerful connector.  Food brings us together with family and friends, and allows us to express and receive love and appreciation, spark new relationships, create memories, discover and care for the world around us, and even navigate and explore our inner emotional and spiritual landscape. Because food helps us feel connected, we may also reach for it in moments of disconnection, distress, isolation, and loneliness. We can turn to it for comfort, or for a sense of familiarity and reassurance. And that’s because of a foundational, biochemical truth for every human being on this planet:  When we eat food, we feel better.  As Marc David unpacks in this episode, using food to self-soothe and comfort ourselves isn’t all bad. In fact, the conscious use of food to feel better can actually be beneficial. Fifty-nine year old guest coaching client, Debra, endured the death of her late husband several years ago – and now finds herself again grieving the loss

Our culture is quick to praise dramatic weight loss. But it rarely acknowledges the heaviness that so often lingers afterward – the fear of gaining it all back. When we’re afraid of being overweight, it’s easy to see food as the enemy. We’ll often try to skip meals and deny our appetite. And it seems to make sense … After all, it’s food that makes us gain weight, right?  The challenge is, when we fear or blame food – or try to repress our biological need for nourishment, we can develop other unwanted eating habits like “sneak eating” or binge eating. Which often leads us to spiraling into even more fear about our weight. That’s what we explore in this episode of The Psychology of Eating Podcast, where Marc David finds our guest coaching client Tamara at a critical crossroads. Tamara’s journey with weight began at age 10, when she was bullied for being heavy as a child. Through a series of lifestyle changes, Tamara, 48, has lost nearly 270 pounds – and yet, Tamara is still haunted by her weight. With 10 more p

When we’re facing a chronic health challenge, one of the great ways to help ourselves is to turn to food and diet. So many of us have had great success when using the “food as medicine” approach. But what happens when our healing diet routine feels too restrictive?  And how do we reconcile our need to avoid certain foods with our natural desire for freedom and exploration? These are just some of the questions Cecili’s hopes to unpack as Marc’s guest on this episode. Cecili is a nutritionist who’s spent more than a decade self-treating her own inflammatory bowel disease. After rejecting conventional treatments, Cecili embraced a food-as-medicine approach which eliminated her symptoms within months.  Now, Cecili seeks support in one area that continues to confound her – fear and anxiety around introducing new foods into her diet, and their potential for causing unwanted symptoms.  Follow along as Marc supports Cecili to reframe her journey, from a focus on fear and anxiety to the development of self-trust.  “As