Zero Blog Thirty



Zero Blog Thirty is a military podcast presented by Barstool  Sports that's listenable for the most crusty of veterans, the bootest of boots, or people who have never touched a weapon in their life. Through the eyes of enlisted Marines and a West Point trained officer, Zero Blog Thirty is like sitting at the online-bar of the VFW and having a virtual cold one with your buddies.


  • ZBT #341: Navy/Coast Guard Turtle Rescues + New Mars Rover

    ZBT #341: Navy/Coast Guard Turtle Rescues + New Mars Rover

    23/02/2021 Duración: 01h07min

    ROUND 1 (15:07): What the… What the shell? What the sh… what the shell? The Navy and Coast Guard teamed up to rescue over 1100 sea turtles down in Texas who were experiencing shell shock from the cold. ROUND 2 (21:25): A new rover landed on Mars and now we can see and hear what the planet is like. It is only a matter of time until the Marine Corps makes it a training base. ROUND 3 (32:29): Talk show host Greg Kelly goes after Biden’s dog for looking too mangy for the White House… You leave these goddamn dogs ALONE, Greg. ROUND 4 (42:25): This year marks the 75th anniversary of the Nuremberg convictions & what better way to showcase that than saying “Auf Wiedersehen, bitcc” to a Nazi found living in Tennessee. ROUND 5 (50:46): Chaps round special: men with THESE features are the best in bed…

  • ZBT #340: 30 Taliban Die Making A Bomb + The Tale Of Kates Car

    ZBT #340: 30 Taliban Die Making A Bomb + The Tale Of Kate's Car

    19/02/2021 Duración: 01h28min

    ROUND 1 (27:46): Winter weather down south causes more than a dozen military bases to close, including the illustrious Fort Chaps ROUND 2 (41:01): A former Navy SEAL and Special Ops Commander who oversaw the raid to kill Bin Laden is writing a book… You might think “oh, reaaaal original”, but what if we told you it’s a children’s book…?! ROUND 3 (47:24): One of our allies has been in Afghanistan with us for 20 years now, but just announced they’ll be withdrawing the very last of their troops this May. I’ll give you a clue… “The Kiwis are knackered” New Zealand accent) ROUND 4 (54:32): Did you hear the one about the 30 Taliban extremists killed after a massive explosion during their bomb-making class? No? Weird, the story is really…. blowing up online. ROUND 5 (58:10): Russia is bragging about new flak jackets that will stop uh... .50 cal rounds… Sure Jan!

  • ZBT #339: Worst Parts Of Military Jobs + Surviving Four Plane Crashes

    ZBT #339: Worst Parts Of Military Jobs + Surviving Four Plane Crashes

    17/02/2021 Duración: 01h20min

    Round 1 (6:04): Drama in your fam because of politics? The first story might make you feel a little bit better.. Former ZBT guest & congressman Adam Kinzinger is going through the wringer right now in the wake of the impeachment trial & my goodness does he have an annoying cousin. Round 2 (15:40): The perfect crime does exist and there’s an article about it in the Detroit Free Press. Round 3 (22:47): Ever crashed in a plane? Oh. You have? Ever crashed in a plane FOUR FUCKING TIMES and then fell in love? Interesting.We know someone who has. Round 4 (29:40): If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe. Round 5 (39:49): Every job has its pros & cons but we asked YOU about the worst part of your MOS and as per usual the answers did not disappoint Song at the end is a cover of Don't Think Twice It's Alright by Billy Strings

  • ZBT #338: The Green Weenie Dating Back To Roman Times

    ZBT #338: The Green Weenie Dating Back To Roman Times

    12/02/2021 Duración: 01h11min

    ROUND 1 (8:27): Navy Veteran & Hustler publisher Larry Flynt has passed away. His legacy isnt all buttholes and titties. ROUND 2 (26:49): Archaeologists have found a Roman soldier's pay stub & it’s safe to say some things in the military have always been the same... ROUND 3 (35:12): Firewatch. And maybe bomb watch. Explosives missing at 29 Palms ROUND 4 (39:18): Women arrive at MCRD for historic co-ed training and we’ve got some live audio of what’s going on over there + update on rules for new moms. ROUND 5 (44:57): Why hello fellow kewl teens, The US Ambassador to Vietnam is here to kick off your Friday with a totally rad rap song for the Lunar New Year and it is litty ROUND 6 (50:05): It’s no secret that US Presidents like to golf. Heck, Ike had a putting green installed in the Oval Office bathroom. We got an all new serpentine draft of the best activities for Presidents to do to relax.

  • ZBT #337: Marines #1 in Hazing + Time Travel Goofin

    ZBT #337: Marines #1 in Hazing + Time Travel Goofin

    09/02/2021 Duración: 01h12min

    Round 1 (11:08): A Woman sucking dick is the bravest story you’ll hear today. Round 2 (15:36): Our good pals, The Air Force Security Forces Defenders, have some explaining to do as some fella just snuck on base and was doin a little plane goofin on the flight line at Andrews. Round 3 (26:39): The Pentagon released the results of the first-ever service wide hazing data. It turns out the Space Force leads all branches in hazing reports. Ah, just kidding. It was the Marines. Round 4 (40:46): it’s time to update the safety brief: A woman used gorilla glue instead of hairspray in order to keep her hair down. Round 5 (48:03): It’s time to talk about time and space and how folks are attempting to bend time like beckham. Put on your scientists’ hats, baby girls. We’re going intergalactic.

  • ZBT #336: China Wants Manly Men + Pregnant Military Women Troubles

    ZBT #336: China Wants Manly Men + Pregnant Military Women Troubles

    05/02/2021 Duración: 01h25min

    ROUND 1 (10:27): China is sick and tired of their boys growing up to become pussies. So, they are sending out government sponsored ads. Do we need that? Hard to say. ROUND 2 (21:12): Coast Guard fixes the light at loneliest place in the world and we aren’t talkin about PFC Bren’s room in 2019. ROUND 3 (28:51): Moms in the military getting screwed just because they got laid and are having some babies. Being a mom shouldn’t end your career. Brave of us, right? Take note, Chinese men. ROUND 4 (40:50): In this round, we’ll talk some World War I. Monkey Meat. AIDs. And the Venn Diagram that connects them all. ROUND 5 (47:10): The New Sec Def is issuing a Department of Defense wide stand down over the threats of extremism in the ranks. As an example, a sailor put a fucking noose by the rack of a black sailor…. IN 2021! ROUND 6 (57:16): The Choir Recruit of the National Guard lifted spirits by lifting his voice in the world’s most echorific room.

  • ZBT #335: $400 Million in Gold + Marine Veteran Beau Wise

    ZBT #335: $400 Million in Gold + Marine Veteran Beau Wise

    02/02/2021 Duración: 01h19min

    Round 1 (6:17): Starting the show with a safety brief. Dont drink anti-freeze. I know it smells delicious. Still… dont do it. Round 2 (14:24): Nothing gets my blood pumping like a tale about gold in them there hills. The FBI might be doing something shady with 400 million dollars worth of Civil War Era gold. We’ll tell you about this story which sure as shit should be a movie. Round 3 (23:05): HUGE shoutout to the Chief of Staff of the Army. I FUCKING LOVE stories like this one. Round 4 (28:56): The air force has some new spray-on bandages that will help you heal like you’re Wolverine whatever that means. Round 5 (43:27): I sat down with the only person in the Afghanistan/Iraq wars to be given the title of Sole Survivor. Beau Wise joined the show to talk about his book Three Wise Men.

  • ZBT #334: Sergeant Major of the Army Michael Grinston + Military MacGyvering

    ZBT #334: Sergeant Major of the Army Michael Grinston + Military MacGyvering

    29/01/2021 Duración: 01h30min

    ROUND 1: A pilot out for joyride landed on a Royal Air Force base bc he ‘wanted to see the beach!” Now he owes them $5,000 ROUND 2: Have you or your fellow troops ever MacGyvered equipment to complete a mission? We asked, & you answered with things that are more “MacGroober level”, but impressive nonetheless. ROUND 3: One of the best feelings in the world? Cancelled plans. And 1,000 Marines in the freezing land of Norway are soaking up that feeling as we speak. ROUND 4: We sat down with the Sergeant Major of the Army, Michael Grinston, and he didn’t call Cons, “Sir” once. Suck on it Cons. We talked about the new Army regs on grooming and the overall culture in the Army today. Get your hair ties ready. ROUND 5: With new Presidents come new positions, so last week we gave you a rundown on the new head of Veteran’s Affairs, and this week we introduce you to ‘the flying 69’. (Kate - oh, GREAT position). Just kidding, but we’ll intro your new Secretary of Defense, retired 4-star Lloyd Austin.

  • ZBT #333: National Guard Garage Goofin + Covid Sniffing Dogs

    ZBT #333: National Guard Garage Goofin + Covid Sniffing Dogs

    26/01/2021 Duración: 01h14min

    Round 1: People over the weekend were shitting down ole Senator Tom Cotton about his claim of being a ranger. Was that stolen valor or just a little ranger goofin. Round 2: in A doggie bag of sorts, the Miami Heat are bringing in detector dogs to smell for COVID. Will that work? Well, it’s hard to say. Round 3: Lots of changes are happening in the Oval. The British are upset about a statue and a beloved soft drink button has been removed. Will democracy survive? Round 4: National Guard troops were parked in the garage in the capitol and people were big mad about it. Round 5: What's the craziest thing someone you knew in uniform said or believed? I’ll come up with something better than my pals believing you could swim under Okinawa because the Island floated.

  • ZBT #332: Army Soldier Conspiring With ISIS + Inauguration Goofin

    ZBT #332: Army Soldier Conspiring With ISIS + Inauguration Goofin

    22/01/2021 Duración: 01h33min

    ROUND 1: Inauguration / New President ROUND 2: Would you rather take a hit on your military record or pay a small fine? We’d like to bring back the olden days where that was an option. ROUND 3: Elon Musk shared 6 Rules of Productivity that shows a liiiiitle bit of a divide Between Military and Civilian Workplaces ROUND 4: The 30th anniversary or Desert Storm was this past week & we’ve got some fast facts & history ROUND 5: A U.S. service member has been arrested and charged in a plot to conspire with ISIS to conduct ambush attacks on his fellow soldiers

  • ZBT #331: Stolen Humvees + Military Questions and Answers

    ZBT #331: Stolen Humvees + Military Questions and Answers

    19/01/2021 Duración: 01h13min

    Round 1: It is with a heavy heart that we announce that a humvee was stolen. If you lost your humvee, what is a fair punishment? Add best answers from social in the morning Round 2: The message from the Puerto Rican commander of the national guard unit that is coming to DC was beyond motivating. If you wanna be inspired, stick around for round 2. Round 3: School Circle on us. We are gonna answer some more questions that the beloved troops have. Could be good advice. Could be bad advice. We’ll just have to see, I guess. It’ll probably be bad though. Stinks but that’s just a fact. Round 4: Big Balls OR FLAPS of the week goes to our Russian pal who was poisoned a few months ago. This dude is an absolute lunatic. Round 5: In a story that should be the poster child for good initiative but bad judgment, a former Army Soldier, lookin at you Cons, was arrested for inciting violence in… checks notes… no… this cant be… Tallahassee? What the fuck

  • ZBT #330: National Guard in DC + WWE Superstar, Marine Veteran Montez Ford

    ZBT #330: National Guard in DC + WWE Superstar, Marine Veteran Montez Ford

    15/01/2021 Duración: 01h34min

    ROUND 1: On the last episode I said we’d be totally avoiding this topic today but Kate sucks & has a quick, light, flaky, buttery, syrupy, tasty little update on the latest in DC regarding the troops deployed to the Capitol. ROUND 2: Burn pits, move aside - today we’ve got facts about your arm pits & sweat glands since we already covered buttholes & nipples after previous political topics. Captain Cons, this is your time to shine. ROUND 3: Cue the Bertie Higgins yacht rock but not because we need a palate cleanser from a sad topic - The Coast Guard recovered a stolen Tiki Hut Bar Boat & this thing is a BEAUT ROUND 4: Cons chatted with WWE Superstar Montez Ford about realizing his lifelong dream of being a pro wrestler but not before he stood on the yellow footprints on Parris Island ROUND 5: Safety Brief - don’t go injecting magic mushrooms directly into your veins this weekend. A man in Nebraska found this out the hard way when the ‘shrooms started growing in HIS VEINS and nearly killed

  • ZBT #329: Parler Hacked and Grave Robbin Goofin

    ZBT #329: Parler Hacked and Grave Robbin' Goofin'

    12/01/2021 Duración: 01h22min

    Round 1: We’d be derelict in our duties if we didn’t remind folks that violating OPSEC procedures has its consequences. Parler users are figuring that out. Round 2: I don’t know about y'all, but all this shitty news is a kick in the dick. Luckily, our friends at Military Times put out a list to keep up motivated. Round 3: President Trump is acting like the world’s greatest Lance Corporal. Round 4: In a sign that nature is healing, we return to solely military news to talk about the General who was demoted for an affair with 3 subordinates. Round 5: A couple fellas got caught grave goofin. Their explanation is just a touch weird. Song at the end is Crazy Train - Ozzy Osbourne (Motown Style Cover) ft. Jennie Lena

  • ZBT #328: Terrorists In The Capitol

    ZBT #328: Terrorists In The Capitol

    07/01/2021 Duración: 01h15min

    ROUND 1: Huge news out of DC - they’re opening a Hooters near Quantico & all troops will get a 10% discount. - wow, whoa, unbelievable - Just kidding ha - ha Obviously we’re gonna kick things off with a rundown of the chaos at the Capitol. We’ve got a timeline of what went down on Wednesday along with updates. ROUND 2: Seven interesting facts about butts and buttholes because Kate is bad at handling heavy situations ROUND 3: The Air Force’s top enlisted leader is looking into why an airman was punished for… wait for it… punished for - attempting suicide ROUND 4: Interesting facts about nipples because Kate still feels like this is a real heavy time & we just need a little nipple chat

  • ZBT #327: 2021 Will Be The Horniest Year On Record

    ZBT #327: 2021 Will Be The Horniest Year On Record

    05/01/2021 Duración: 01h18min

    Round 1: With 2020 officially in the books, is it time to turn the page to what many experts are saying will be the horniest year of all time? Round 2: The gas chamber is one of the military’s rites of passage. One tale from over the break will make you wanna head back to the gas chamber… especially Kate from March to July Round 3: New year, new us. When I was headed to boot camp, travel was on my mind. I wanted to see the ole globe. I got to see a lot but certainly not every country. I wanna take us on a little audio journey and explore countries in alphabetical order. First up, Afghanistan. Round 4: Help us help you. We scoured the internet to find questions we could help young boots or salt dogs with. We wanna hear your stories though…. But for now, these will do.

  • ZBT #326: What We Loved And Hated About This Year

    ZBT #326: What We Loved And Hated About This Year

    30/12/2020 Duración: 01h10min

    Round 1: With Christmas over, we take a look back at what makes gift giving special. I think it’s a personal touch like giving someone their own leg that was amputated. That’d be nice. Round 2: Can eating a healthy person’s shit make you healthy? You’re unsure? So are scientists who are researching the power of poop. Round 3: A british cop has an unreal ability. He can recognize faces unlike most folks. Because of that, he’s basically been assigned firewatch forever. Round 4: President Trump issued some pardons right before Christmas and we are in full support of one of the pardons that is making waves. Round 5: A video of a fella using a flame thrower to clear his driveway of snow went viral this week. Our guy Woody Williams would be proud. But, that cant be the best weapon to clear snow. We’ll do a snake draft to decide. Round 6: We are going around the room to discuss our personal favorite moments from ZBT in 2020 and what we want to leave in the burn pit

  • ZBT #325: Massive Christmas Episode!

    ZBT #325: Massive Christmas Episode!

    22/12/2020 Duración: 04h43min

    Presented by ArborTech Tools! Visit for 25% off and start doing something productive Round 1: Big weekend for the Space Force. Those adorable little bundles of joy got their nickname! It’s so cute! But, that’s not all. The first Space Force member got demoted! YAY! Round 2: A Ranger School Commander was relieved of his duties for yelling inappropriate and demeaning things at subordinates. We have the audio and boy is it a doozy. Round 3: With a recent court decision, I’m positive my old Gunny owes me about 40 thousand dollars. Finally, porn viewers will be treated with respect! Round 4: One of the russian spies who did a little old fashioned poisoning was duped by the fella that he poisoned and now we know their methods. I bet Putin is PISSED. Round 5: School circle on me. I’m gonna talk with Rep. Adam Kinzinger about what’s happening in our world. Best Interviews of 2020 (and some from 2019)! Captain Charles Plumb (1:17-1:50) Woody Williams (1:50-2:16) Rocky Bleier (2:16-3:02)

  • ZBT #324: The Army Cures Covid

    ZBT #324: The Army Cures Covid

    18/12/2020 Duración: 01h49min

    Presented by ArborTechTools! Visit for 25% off all their woodcarving tools and make something with your hands. ROUND 1: In response to a threat to the troops, the Army has developed an incredible piece of combat gear coming out in 2021. The speed in design, manufacturing & logistics of distributing this complex item will give you a whole new respect for the branch… DIS-respect. ROUND 2: If you’ve been disqualified from joining the military it’s ok to feel upset. What’s not ok? To uh - go back to the recruiting station & fire a weapon through the windows. Not gonna help your cause, pal. ROUND 3: The Australian Army is investigating a soldiers' use of a Taliban fighter's prosthetic leg… And yes, you guessed it. He used it as a beer mug. ROUND 4: The US Military had a hot date with China’s this week but we were left alone at the table with a fine bottle of white wine & red cheeks… since they were a no show. China, call us back. Please! ROUND 5: Cons sat down with two ladi

  • ZBT #323: WWE Superstar and Marine Veteran Lacey Evans + Remembering Chuck Yeager

    ZBT #323: WWE Superstar and Marine Veteran Lacey Evans + Remembering Chuck Yeager

    15/12/2020 Duración: 01h44min

    Presented by ArborTech Tools Visit and use promo code ZERO at checkout for 25% off! Round 1: CyberPunk 2077 was released last week and people were going nuts that you could make a player have a big or small dick. If the same types of features were added to COD, what would you do? Round 2: The Secretary of the VA has been called on to resign over his seemingly insane treatment of a woman who is a veteran and congressional staffer. Round 3:Osama Bin Laden’s fat fuck friend was released from jail for being too fat and now hes eating fish and chips in an expensive london flat and it makes me wanna pull my pubes out. Round 4: I sat down with WWE Superstar and motivator Lacy Evans. I was legit impressed with her hard chargeriness. Round 5: Last week, we lost a legend of the game. Chuck Yaeger, the test pilot and twitter god, died at the age of 97

  • ZBT #322: The Fort Hood Investigation And The 2/7 SgtMaj Is The Grinch

    ZBT #322: The Fort Hood Investigation And The 2/7 SgtMaj Is The Grinch

    11/12/2020 Duración: 01h34min

    Presented by ArborTech Tools! Visit and use promo code "Zero" for 25% off the best woodcarving tools you can get. ROUND 1: A Sergeant Major in 2/7 is getting roasted like a green weenie over the hot coals of NCO rage this week & there’s viral memes to prove it. Why? Apparently he went Grinch mode and threatened to take the Marine’s holiday leave away. ROUND 2: In the wake of Vanessa Guillén’s murder, Army Secretary Ryan McCarthy announced that 14 leaders at Fort Hood were being fired or suspended, and an independent review has revlealed an environment where women were in “survival mode”. We speak with Haley Britzkey of Task & Purpose who’s been covering the story. ROUND 3: Shhhhh, keep it down, round 3 is about the quietest place in the United States and the how the Navy is ruining that WITH THEIR LOUD ASS PLANES ROUND 4: Cons is sitting down with former Naval Academy and NFL player Napoleon McCallum to talk about a game that is happening this weekend or something. Who kno

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