Poema Podcast

In this special episode, I sit with Becky Castle Miller and tell my own story. A story of childhood trauma, multiple grief experiences, and a journey through the unhealth of certainty and spiritual abuse, into deconstructing not just my faith, but my life and my identity. It's a story of transcendent spiritual experiences, betrayal, suicidal ideation and nearly losing it all. A journey of healing, transformation and embodiment.  My story. 

Today my friend Kelly Wolfe joins me, to talk about sex, desire, lust, masturbation and healthy ways we can connect these with Christian faith.  We talk about the damage purity culture and shame has done to so many people, and how we need to unlearn this and begin to talk about these subjects openly and honestly, and be honest about our desires and how our bodies work, and need to express themselves sexually.  Kelly talks openly about how masturbation in the right context can be a healthy expression of our sexuality - and how and why this fits with the way of Jesus and honours how we were created. Finally, Kelly also discusses the difference between lust and desire, and why we should have no shame in discussing and ethically exploring our sexuality - and why this is a beautiful, divine gift.    

I'm delighted to be joined today by Dr Hillary McBride PhD, therapist, researcher, author and former co-host of The Liturgists podcast (this episode was recorded before she announced her departure). We just started talking and let the conversation flow - it began by Hillary sharing her own journey and about the experience of being a therapist during a pandemic.  Hillary and I also talked about where following our curiosity can take us in our lives, conversations, art and our own personal journeys. She also talks about growth, and how we can often find growth & meaning even in the midst of hardship. Hillary then shares how we need to become familiar with the language of our own pain, and how this can be helpful in our journeys of growth and healing.  We end by exploring grief in more depth, and how historically we have dealt with grief as a culture and how we can use the energy of grief on a broader scale to bring about cultural change.  This was hands down one of my all time favourite conversations f

Today I'm joined by Yogi and author Anita Grace Brown to hear her story and talk about her work exploring the connections between Christ, Yoga and how this intertwines with our journey of growth. Anita shares with us how we can use yoga and the story of Jesus to help us enter healthy state of centeredness. She tells us how the human soul might just be God's muscle which we need to work on strengthening - and if we do, we could be transformed.  Anita believes we are more resilient than we think, and more conscious than we think - and today we explore this. ***** Anita's book Kamikaze Yogi is available now!

Today I'm joined by Dr Robyn Henderson-Espinoza, Ph.D, Transqueer Activist Latinx Scholar, Public Theologian, and host of the Activist Theology podcast. Dr Robyn tells their story about their lived experience of living with autism, how they became aware of their diagnosis, and not just freedom it brought but also the grief of realising how this may have impacted others pre-diagnosis.  They then talk about what this time of lockdown and a global pandemic can teach, and how we can use this time to connect with ourselves each other. We also talk about the pandemic has amplified the flawed, unequal system of capitalism we all live in. Dr Robyn shares how our relationships have been impacted by this mindset, by a transactional model over one of connection and compassion. Dr Robyn then explores his work, and what action he's been taking & we can take to subvert the system and bring about a more compassionate, connected world. ______ Find more of Dr Robyn's work at www.irobyn.com 

I'm honoured to be joined by Dr Khaleah Bradshaw, who shares her own story, and also talks about her experiences and research on patriarchy and singleness within the black community.  We talk about the challenges all single people face, and why it's better to wait and find a partner who's a good match, than rush in. We also discuss how the challenges of breaking down patriarchal systems which can shame people for singleness.  This was a fun and insightful conversation, which will challenge and inspire. 

In this episode I'm joined by certified life coach and therapist Shelley DeJong. Today Shelley shares her own story of addiction, rock bottom and transformation, and the challenges and stigma she's faced with multiple sclerosis. She talks about her lowest moments and how she shifted out of those places into recovery and healing, and the lessons she's learned in both her life, and her work now as a therapist and a life coach, about healing and personal transformation.

Today my friend Jenna DeWitt joins me. She tells her story of discovering her own sexual and gender identity having grown up in a more traditional Christian environment. Jenna shares about the wide variety of types on the asexual spectrum, and how she discovered a community of people just like her, and found a healthy faith community which accepted her. She likens the wide variety in every aspect of creation, planets, plants, races, animals, how all are different yet all are beautiful and belong. She also talks about the diversity of the divine themselves, and how this should and is reflected in his creation, including humanity.  This was a wonderful episode to record, Jenna has so much wisdom and insight in this area, take a listen and give her a follow on Twitter at @Jenna_DeWitt.

Today LGBTQI+ pastor Matt Nightingale joins me to tell his story. He shares when he first began to realise he was gay, how this impacted his marriage and his work, and finally coming to the painful and courageous decision to go public, and end his marriage.  We then discuss the consequences of this for him, his family and his work and how he's now moving into more freedom and creating communities and safe spaces for LGBTQI+ online, and how it's impacted his role as a pastor.  Matt is so inspiring and courageous, it was amazing to talk to him. 

Today I'm joined by writer, theology and the arts MLitt student & book marketer Alexis De Weese to talk about how creativity & the creative process can be a healthy spiritual practice.  We both share experiences from our own lives & work where the creative process has allowed us to connect with ourselves and the divine, and how creativity can be a sacred act which opens us up to experience the divine in fresh, and deeply intimate ways. And Alexis offers practical tips for us to help make creativity a sacred space for us. This was such a fun, insightful and inspiring conversation, Alexis has such wisdom in this area and it was great to chat to her.     

In this episode we talk to Dr Kate Thomas and Dr Kyleanne Hunter about a unique grief & trauma experience, but one which is becoming increasingly relevant in a pandemic and future post pandemic world - the experiences of military women when they return from services. We talk about the unique challenges this represents for so many women, which impact all aspects of their lives, from mental and physical health to career - and how some have developed resilience and learned to move forward positively, whilst others have found more difficulty.  In a world where we are all going through a collective trauma and grief, and will one day need to go into the world again, this conversation - held in late March 2020 - feels more relevant than ever. 

Today I'm joined by podcaster and writer Jonathan Puddle, host of the 'Puddcast', to talk about loving ourselves as we are - and loving ourselves the way we're loved by the divine.  Jonathan tells the story of how he doubted myself and condemned himself, and even hated himself—until he was reminded and had the word of Jesus 'love your neighbour as yourself' come to him from a whole new perspective. He talks about how this shift in perspective led everything in his life to change. Jonathan tells us how important it is to love ourselves, just how the divine sees and loves us, and some practical tips for learning to love ourselves better.

Today I'm joined by social psychologist and author Dr Devon Price to discuss their new book, 'Laziness Does Not Exist'. Devon explains how the myth of of laziness developed through the rise of capitalism and the 9-5 working week, and how this is totally contrary to a sustainable, healthy life. They discuss the concept of productivity and numbers and how these have become a marker for a successful life, when in fact this isn't true. Devon alsos explain the damage these myths have done to us individually and as a society, in terms of physical and mental health, and other ways. Finally, Devon tells us what we can do to change this - including some practices and mindsets we can adopt which can help us live healthier lives. 

Today Allison Fallon returns to the show to talk about her new book 'The Power of Writing It Down'.  In this episode we explore the power of a writing habit to transform our lives. Allison shares stories and science which both prove conclusively how the act of regular writing can improve both our mental, physical and emotional health. We talk about how writing can connect us with ourselves and reveal truth about us and our lives we might not notice otherwise.  Allison also shares how we can overcome creative blocks, and build a healthy writing habit, and how writing can ultimately be a self-care practice. 

Today podcaster Lauren Larkin joins me to explore the connections between unprocessed grief, religious certainty, and narcissistic behaviour & systems.  We talk about how unprocessed grief can often be controlled and repressed by religious certainty and how the longer this goes on, the deeper the disconnection between us and our true selves, and even to the realities we live in - leading to narcissistic behaviour & religious/cultural systems growing and becoming powerful, such as fundamentalist evangelicalism & Trumpism in the US We then go on to explore how and why we need to process our grief and name it, and how this can transform not just our spirituality but our very being. 

For the first episode of 2021, pastor and author Abby Norman joins me to reflect on 2020 and to discuss the importance of talking to each other and to God about our personal, and collective grief.  Abby talks about how we need to learn how to embrace lament, to name our grief before others and with God. We talk about examples of this in our own lives, and in scripture. Abby shares how grief and lament have the power to give us healing and invite us into personal and spiritual transformation, and connect with Jesus and the divine in more intimate way. 

Today my beloved friends Julida Alter and Anella Platter - AKA the Blacksmith's Daughters - join me to talk about their Christmas album, Forged at Christmas.  Anella and Julida talk to me about the creative process behind several songs of the album. Then we explore how what we create is often a reflection of our own journeys, and also how knowing the story behind the work can help us connect with music and other art more deeply, as well as what the creative process does to us.  And to top it all off, we get some live performances of some of the songs on the album, including some of the ones we discuss. 

Today I'm joined by author and musician Jamie Kocur, who tells us her personal deconstruction story, told in her book ' My CMM Soundtracked Life'. She shares how Contemporary Christian Music (CCM) seemed, for her, a perfect place to nestle into, but eventually became a place to hide. Jamie dreamed of becoming a Christian singer-songwriter and this dream took her down some unexpected paths, including a literal journey through four continents where she came face-to-face with some of CCM’s biggest artists and Hollywood stars. She tells of how the more she experienced the world, the more the evangelical Christian bubble she had lived in was exposed. She tells us how this led to her faith deconstruction and how this deconstruction impacted her, her life, faith and vocation - and how when she began to explore doubt and mystery, she found a new way to experience God, and a new song to sing.   

Today Melissa Kicher, a certified, practicing enneagram coach, joins me on the podcast to explore the enneagram in more detail than ever before on the show. In this episode we go in depth into the characteristics and traits of every enneagram number, and examine how each might be responding to the grief & trauma we've experienced, including sharing our own lived experiences which only confirm just how accurate Melissa is. Melissa concludes by sharing some practical tips for each enneagram number, about how we can get through this time and manage the stress we're going through well. 

Today I'm joined by author and advocate J Nicole Morgan, to discuss fatphobia and fat-shaming, and fat positivity.  Nicole shares her lived experience of being fat, and her own journey of discovery, from at first thinking God required her to be thin to be loved and accepted, to a fat positive perspective, an understanding of the truth God loves and accepts her as she is.  Nicole discusses what she learned about fatphobia and fat-shaming not only in evangelical culture but western culture, and some misconceptions and misunderstandings she learned around things like diet, obesity and health. Nicole reminds us in this episode that no matter our body size, we are loved and accepted as we are.