The Joy Junkie Show

When I was a little girl, I remember my super evangelical, conservative mama telling me, “There’s this sinful notion out there that if something feels good, you should do it.” I’m sad to say this was one of the first messages I received that all things pleasurable were actually of the devil. I shit you not. Of course this message certainly applied to sex and drinking and other debachery [she says sarcastically], but this message was also super harmful around the pleasure derived from food. From enjoying delicious meals and treats. I mean one of the seven deadly sins is gluttony, for fuck’s sake. You may have grown up with a similar sentiment around the morality of food. Not necessarily that Jesus would be after you, but think about how many times you’ve indulged in a decadent cake or delicious ice cream and have said something like, “Oh, I’m being so bad.” Or if you opt for the kale over the cupcake, you get to label yourself as “good”. Listen, food has nothing to do with morality and the idea that we deny ou

If you operate in a femme body or identify as female, it’s highly likely you’ve found yourself contending with a litany of body image “issues”. I put issues in quotes because the things that we worry about, and subsequently own as our “issues”, are purposely manufactured to commodify and exploit our bodies. In essence we’re programmed to have “issues”. They’re given to us. For example, we used to never worry about having body hair. Like, not even a thing. Then, Gillette pops up like, “Hey, we wanna make some money, so how ‘bout you start to think having hair on your legs is gross and give us money to fix it.”  Think about how many products in your pantry, medicine cabinet, dresser drawers, shower, and bathroom vanity have become vaults for a myriad of products designed to change the way you look. Why? Because we have bought into the societal belief that women are valuable based solely on their bodies. And, we have an unbelievably limited view of which bodies are acceptable and permissible. But what if your bo

One. More. Thing. One more thing and you may just lose your god-damn mind. If one more person asks something of you… If one more task gets added to your to-do list… You may just Lose. Your. Shit. We’ve all been in this crazy-ass-stressed-the-fuck-out place where we become, uh-hem, a little less than the best version of ourselves. We scream at our kids when they need something minimal. We lash out at our spouse, or friend, or co-worker when they are just trying to help. In essence, we become somewhat addicted to being super stressed out and overwhelmed.  Here’s the unique thing about navigating modern stressors… When our primitive ancestors were dealing with some kind of threat, let’s say a lion, they would have a sharp spike of stress, handle the stressful situation (escape the lion) and then easily be able to access a calm, tranquil space. In essence, they were able to complete the entire stress response cycle. But now we are in many stressful situations that simply don’t stop. #helloCovid Whether it be traf

It’s no secret that our capitalist society places extreme value on how much we can produce and if we’re not producing, then we simply aren’t “enough”. We’re not worthy. We fucking suck. The message that many of us recieve is that we must constantly hustle, hustle, hustle in order to be valuable. You want to get ahead in business? You have to burn the candle at both ends. You want to have a family and run a business? Get ready for zero sleep. And constantly taking care of everyone else except yourself.  You push. You hustle. You push. You hustle.  And, then one day your body is like,”Bitch, we’re done” and all of a sudden you find yourself with extreme exhaustion, adrenal fatigue, thyroid issues, or a bevy of other autoimmune issues. The effects that long-term, chronic stress has on the body is no joke. So, what-the-hell do we do about it? This week, I dialed up my pal, Dr. Mariza Snyder, a functional practitioner and women’s hormone expert, to find out what we can do to start mitigating the stress cycle that

Many times when you are feeling either physical or emotional discomfort, it’s a huge indication that there is a need you have that isn’t being met. For example, let’s say you’ve been feeling a sense of sadness, disconnection, and loneliness and when you dig a bit deeper behind that emotion, you realize you’ve really been needing connection and belonging. Time to reach out to the bestie you haven’t talked to in awhile.  Or maybe you’ve noticed that your workplace leaves you constantly stressed out, overwhelmed, and feeling discouraged. When you look behind those emotions, you realize that you have desperately been needing acknowledgment, rest, and ease. Time to schedule some time off or talk to the boss about lessening your workload. Many times when we feel discomfort, we simply leave it at that and just complain. We bitch about hating Covid but fail to notice our need for connection being stepped on. Or we rant about our stupid boss and our stupid job, but don’t take time to notice the needs that deserve atte

How many times have you silenced yourself from expressing how you truly feel to someone because you fear coming across as needy? Maybe you worry what your partner may say if you find yourself needing more alone time. Or perhaps you think your over-achieving sister will slam you in front of the fam and call you lazy if you take the time you truly need to rest and recharge. Like, god-forbid you actually honor the fact that literally every human being has needs. Not to mention we have a massive patriarchal narrative that reserves “neediness” largely for those identifying as women… and not necessarily in a good way. Perhaps you’ve been told, “You’re so emotional” or “You’re too sensitive’ or “You’re so needy” and you received the message loud and fucking clear that your needs are just way too much to handle and accommodate. So, we learn to silence ourselves and abandon what we truly want and need to live a happy life, which can lead to staying in jobs we loath and attached to relationships that make us feel like

You get super jelly that your partner gets to have extra time off work, so you say (in a snarky-ass tone), “Wow. Must be nice to have so much free time”. Or maybe a work group you’re a part of is trying to decide how to handle a specific project and instead of voicing your true thoughts you say, “We can certainly do it your way” and mutter under you breath, “And good fucking luck with that.”  What we have here, folks, are two examples of the Passive-Aggressive Communication Style. Everyone’s fav. But, even though we find it infuriating, many of us do it ourselves aaaaaall the time. If you weren’t properly taught how to advocate for your own wants, needs, and opinions [spoiler: none of us were], it’s likely that you find yourself falling into one of the less-than-effective communication styles. Research has shown that there are four main communication styles: passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive (#guilty), and assertive. Fifty points if you can figure out which one is most effective. Yup, Assertive. But, i

Someone does something that really bothers you, but you’d rather pull your own teeth out than have a confrontation… so you just stay quiet. Or maybe your family is so damn aggressive that you find it easier to hide in the shadows instead of “rocking the boat”.  If you weren’t properly taught how to advocate for your own wants, needs, and opinions [spoiler: none of us were], it’s likely that you find yourself falling into one of the less-than-effective communication styles. Research has shown that there are four main communication styles: passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive (a fan fave), and assertive. Twenty points if you can figure out which one is most effective. Yup, Assertive. But, if you’re like most, you probably dip your toes in a bit of the other three. And, you certainly are not alone. In this episode, part one of two, I take a deep dive into the Passive and the Aggressive communication styles. I cover off what they typically sound like, what their go-to tactics are, what to do if you communicate

So, you consciously “know” that you should allow room to feel your emotions and cultivate vulnerability (Hi, Brené!) but why don’t you actually practice accessing your emotional self? I’ll tell you why. Logic, reason, and rationale are housed in the conscious part of the mind which is estimated to be roughly 10% of the mind power. Your beliefs and habits, however, are located in the subconscious mind which is the other whoppin’ 90%. That means that simply “knowing” that emotional intelligence is mandatory for rich connections doesn’t negate the fact that there is likely a HUGE disempowering belief hanging out in the subconscious telling you how dangerous and scary emotions are. That disempowering belief will win every time. But all is not lost my friend. There are a handful of ways to access and shift the beliefs of the subconscious mind and one of my absolute favorite methods is via hypnosis. In this episode, I share a bit about what hypnosis is, how it works, what sensory preference is and why it matters, a

You know that thing where you consciously understand that you are worthy and “enough” but you struggle to actually believe it? Well, there’s a very real reason for that, so no, you aren’t uniquely broken. Like, at all. It has everything to do with the subconscious part of the mind and how it truly runs our life, behavior, and emotions. Our minds are roughly comprised of 10% conscious faculty and 90% subconscious faculty. That means you can logically, rationally understand something (like worthiness) but if you have a deep-seated belief rooted in the subconscious mind that you most certainly are “not enough”, guess which part of the mind dictates your behaviour? Yup. The whoppin’ 90% subconscious. Well, shit. What are we supposed to do about that?  Well, the great news is there are ways to reprogram the subconscious (thank god!) and my guest this week is going to spill all the deets. Laura Gevanter works in a specific modality called PSYCH-K® that helps individuals move past the trauma that has created limited

You’re livid. Heads are about to roll. Maybe you found out that your partner didn’t take care of an important issue at your child’s school leaving you scrambling at the last minute. Or perhaps your sister went behind your back and shared something with other family members when you specifically asked her not to. Or maybe you can’t listen to the news, get direction from *you know who* at work, or drive to the gym without feeling like you could punch someone (or many someones) in the teeth. Listen, up, Babycakes. Anger is real. It’s a natural, human reaction to feeling wronged, threatened or victimized. But, if you’re like many peeps, you have never been given the tools to navigate anger in a healthy way without plummeting head first into an addiction, a physical altercation, or massively regretting everything you just said/did… like, damaging property or something. So, is the trick to not get mad? Of course not. In the first half of this episode, I address a simple, four-step process to dealing with a fit of a

On April 15, 2013, Jennifer Kauffman was standing approximately 15 feet from the finish line bombing at the 117th Boston Marathon. It goes without saying that surviving this terrorist attack left Jennifer with a litany of physical and emotional wounds to tend to. After addressing the emergent physical healing, Jennifer was left emotionally reeling from this event as she grappled with her extreme rage toward the attackers. As she moved through her emotional healing, and began to find her peace, she felt convicted to share her story with the intention of inspiring others. As a best selling author and an executive producer of two Emmy award-winning movies, she is on a mission to inspire, encourage and empower people to rise despite seemingly impossible situations, transforming their trauma, enabling them to rise and thrive to live their best life. Talk about inspiring. In this candid and unabashed interview, Jennifer shares her personal story, including reading her victim impact statement at the sentencing, and

At the start of every year, it’s likely you get pumped up and excited to make some serious change. You decide on a handful of things that you are GOING to conquer this year, god-damn-it! But what actually makes those goals a reality? Throughout my decade-plus in this work, I have found that noble intentions have very little to do with bringing goals to fruition. Good ol’ fashioned gumption and desire are not enough to make your dreams come true. [sad trombone] In fact, a recent Inc.com article indicated that only 8% of people actually accomplish their goals. WHOA!! 8%!? Well, fuck. But, wait. Never fear, Babycakes, because this episode targets seven ways people tend to sabotage their own goals (without even realizing it) and how you can set yourself up to slaaaaay all your goals. It’s not rocket science, but if you employ some of these easy tactics, you will kill all your 2022 goals! Yes, please! This pod explores: My favorite tool to use to ensure you are tackling this goal for YOU (instead of mom/fam/boss/

Have you ever found yourself feeling like no matter what you do, no matter how hard you work, how “perfect” you may be, or how many damn boxes you’ve checked off it never seems to be enough? Your mind constantly spins with “I’m not smart enough… accomplished enough… pretty enough… good enough” or fill in the blank with some other “not enough”. It’s almost as though your entire life is centered around attaining this elusive Enoughness. And, DAMN is that ever stressful, amiright!? Constantly doing, doing, doing… Constantly achieving. Constantly perfecting. Twisting, contorting… trying to find your worth in how others perceive you. Sound familiar?  Well, I have some very good news for you. If you’ve found yourself trying to garner “enoughness” through these same behaviors or found your inner shit-talker telling you just simply are not good enough, it’s actually not a YOU problem. It’s a much larger problem with the society in which we live. And that society is steeped in patriarchy. So, the great news is that th

FREE PLANNING GUIDE WITH THIS EPISODE ~> If you’re like most people, you have an overwhelming sense of excitement and ambition come the new year. Also like most people, perhaps you hit Jan with a fire under your ass, but when Feb rolls around you have slowly begun to lose steam, fervor, and action. Also, 2021 kicked many of our asses, so there’s that to contend with. Many people (and maybe YOU) enter the New Year with many plans and intentions, but somehow end up a bit off track sooner than later. In this episode, I address the biggest obstacles people unknowingly establish for themselves when crafting New Year’s goals and “resolutions”. Yep, you read that right… many people actually make their job a shit-ton harder by not setting themselves up for success to begin with. I also share my personal planning tool I use to ensure I establish solid goals in aaaaall areas of my life (not just fitness and money… but, yes, those too). Be sure to grab your free planning guide so you can plan and organize a seriously ep

FREE WORKSHOP ~> Even though the holiday season is supposed to be all merry and bright and full of glad tidings, it’s quite certain that you’ve found yourself engaged with total overwhelm, buckling from the stress, and dangerously approaching burnout. Although fun and festive, it can take a sheer act of god to keep you from losing your ever-lovin’ mind during the chaos of this time of year, amiright!? If it’s not the multitude of gifts to buy or the food to prep, then it’s surely the family drama or workplace obligations that bring you to your breaking point. And while you’re spending money on shit you don’t want to buy or baking food for people you don’t even enjoy very much, you find yourself wondering why the fuck peace on earth has eluded you. But, lord help you if you don’t show up to the office party with the secret santa gift or all hell might break loose if you tell the in-laws you can’t make it this year. If you have found yourself overloaded by holiday stress and obligations, get ready for a huge si

FREE WORKSHOP ~> There are certain words that get tossed around the personal development space and are often used without much thought or accuracy. It could be argued that one such word is “intention”. It’s not uncommon to hear someone say “What is your intention for the day?” and often the question is simply implying “Where is your focus going to be today?” But, what if the concept of intention was much broader and actually about who you are being in your life? How you are showing up. Your frequency. Your “come from”. In this week’s episode, I’m so thrilled to dial up an expert who has created an entire well-being company (Evók Life) rooted in the idea of powerful intention. I’m chatting with the incomparable Radiah Rhodes on what intention truly means, and we dig into the powerful Intention Scale tool she’s created to help aid in analyzing how you are operating as it relates to a certain goal you want to achieve. For example, if you are looking to make a shift in your career, are you operating from a place

FREE WORKSHOP ~> Unless you had some kind of utopian upbringing, it’s likely that you were taught how to use logic, reason, and rationale to dictate your choices and actions… to ensure you were doing the “right” thing. But, it’s highly unlikely that someone taught you how to be still, listen to your internal knowing, and lean on your intuition for guidance. In fact, many of us receive a shit-ton of messages about what God deems “right”, what our parents deem “right” or what society tells us is “right”. Nevermind what we intuit as “right”. So, then you hear personal development peeps (possibly even me) tell you to listen to your intuition and what your “gut is telling you” and you’re like, “Ummmmm… Sure. I’ll get right on that. Right after I do my pros and cons list.” It can feel like a foriegn task to listen to your internal knowing when you have constantly leaned on everyone and everything outside of yourself to aid in your decision-making. This week on the show, I’m so thrilled to dial up an expert on the s

FREE WORKSHOP ~> Find yourself dreading holiday functions with your family because it’s only a matter of time until your mom pesters you about why you don’t go to church anymore… or you aunt gives you shit for not having kids or not being married… or your uncle gets in a heated (uncomfortable) “discussion” about gun rights? Or perhaps you’re dreading the impending convo where your bro asks you for money. Again. Even though the holidays are supposed to be merry and bright, they can often be the most stressful when it comes to dealing with our families. Enter years of baggage, a shit-ton of guilt, mix in some alcohol, and you have a family holiday that leaves you feeling like shit instead of connected with those you supposedly love the most. If this sounds any kind of familiar, all is not lost. And, believe it or not, you can totally take back your holiday experience, boundary your ass off, and consciously CHOOSE your focus this holiday. Even if your sister is an ass-hat. This pod explores: How to prepare for