The Flop House

0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:30 - We introduce our guest co-host, leggy comedienne Sara Schaefer.2:31 - 35:29 - We each give our vantage points on the film Vantage Point.  See what I did there?  I made you want to shoot yourself.35:30 - 38:40 - Final judgments. 38:41 - 43:28 - We announce the WINNER OF THE FLOP HOUSE CONTEST!43:29 - 47:17 - The sad bastards recommend.  (Also, according to our web research, the second movie Sara recommends-- the one where she can't remember the title-- is probably Butcher Wing.)47:18 - 52:11 - Sara plugs some stuff, and Stuart demonstrates his complete misunderstanding of the concept of plugs.52:12 - 53:29 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

We talk with the listeners, walk with the listeners.

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 1:57 - We take a moment to discuss Stuart's choice of attire.1:58 - 38:02 - We discuss the film One Missed Call, the movie that asks the question, "Can anything be all bad, if it involves Ray Wise?"38:03 - 41:09 - Final judgments.41:10 - 49:21- The sad bastards recommend. 49:22 - 51:45 - More on the Flop House contest, and goodbyes.51:46 - 52:30 - Theme and outtakes.

The movie minute is taking a summer vacation this week, but we don't want to leave you empty-handed, so enjoy this audio sketch.

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:47 - We have our usual difficulty getting down to business.2:48 - 30:30 - Would 10,000 B.C. have been better if it had starred Ringo Starr and Shelly Long?  Yes.  Yes it would.30:31 - 34:13 - Final judgments.34:14 - 36:45 - A brief digression about the films of Brendan Fraser.36:46 - 46:13 - The sad bastards recommend. 46:14 - 52:57 - A greater explication of the Flop House contest, surveys, podcasty business, and goodbyes.52:58 - 53:39 - Theme and outtakes.

Warm nostalgia swaddles the show, as the gang discusses Teen Wolf.

0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:32 - 30:20 - After welcoming back oft-absent co-host Elliott Kalan and dispensing with some off-topic comics talk, we celebrate Independence Day by examining the slow decline of former America's sweetheart Sandra Bullock in Premonition.30:21 - 32:05 A slight detour, as the Flop House hosts make out their audio living wills.32:06 - 36:09 - Final judgments.36:10 - 40:19 - We rewrite the ending to Premonition.  Also: a lot of nonsense about C.H.U.D.s.40:20 - 48:40 - The sad bastards recommend.48:41 - 51:12 - Podcasty business, a NEW CONTEST ANNOUNCEMENT, and goodbyes.51:13 - 51:54 - Theme and outtakes.

We briefly discuss a barbarian-sized hit. Also: fully clothed breasts!

0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 1:21 - We introduce special guest host, Matt Koff.1:22 - 29:19 - Jump! For my love! Jump in! ...Is a song we'd rather be listening to, than watching the film Jumper, starring Teen Anakin. Skywalker.  29:20 - 33:50 - Final judgments. 33:51 - 39:11 - A little Unbreakable feedback, and Dan hijacks the podcast for his own petty, personal purposes.39:12 - 46:25 - The sad bastards recommend.46:26 - 49:18 - Podcasty business, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

Trailers for some of this summer's biggest films.

0:00 - 0:30 - Intro and theme.0:31 - 1:40 - We welcome back co-host Elliott Kalan after a brief break, and he pitches us a Kalan-centric TV vehicle.1:41 - 26:42 - A perfectly pleasant conversation about sticking your penis in various foodstuffs is ruined by the film Untraceable.26:43 - 30:00 - Final judgments.30:01 - 36:16 - The sad bastards recommend.36:17 - 38:03 - Shilling for the website - now with fan art and videos!38:04 - 40:14 - Some final thoughts about Untraceable, fan art, and penises.40:15 - 41:19 - Goodbyes, theme music, and outtakes.

We present an extended cut from a horror movie classic.

In the battle between Alien and Predator, there can be only one winner, and you can bet it's not the viewing public.  Meanwhile, Stuart reveals a shocking secret about vaginas, Dan does a sub-par 70's TV impression, and Lou keeps urging people to draw things.0:00 - 0:29 - Introduction and theme.0:30 - 2:35 - We speculate about regular host Elliott Kalan's absence, and learn a little about guest host Lou Fernandez.2:36 - 32:05 - Alien vs. Predator, possibly the coolest concept in the world, provided you're an acne-riddled 12-year-old.32:06 - 35:25 - Final judgments.35:26 - 42:14 - The sad bastards recommend.42:15 - 45:07 - We draw your attention to Elliott's recent television triumph and plug our website a little.45:08 - 48:09 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

The Flop House makes a foray into near-journalism and visits the NY ComiCon.

We answer the question, "How bad could a movie with dragon wars possibly be?"  Meanwhile, Dan pitches a new Bikini-themed movie, Elliott has a flashback to the war, Stu makes a love connection, and we all take a big swig of the Hong Kong cocktail.0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 26:07 - After a brief and transparent bid for sympathy on Dan's part, we get down to business and discuss D-Wars: Dragon Wars, the film that can't make up its mind whether to abbreviate itself.26:08 - 27:37 - Final judgments.27:38 - 28:49 - We announce a shameless ploy to increase listenership.28:50 - 32:29 - A long-absent segment makes its triumphant return.32:30 - 38:20 - The sad bastards recommend.38:21 - 42:08 - Some podcast business is taken care of, amidst copious gibberish.42:09 - 43:21 - Goodbyes, theme music, and outtakes.I apologize that the audio quality is slightly lower than the previous few episodes.  My allergy-addled mind didn't take enough time checking the levels, so I sound slightly louder and c

A heartwarming story about spiders disintegrates into despair and recrimination.  Enjoy!

We squander our newfound viral success by spending this episode talking about the movie Bratz.  Meanwhile, Stuart solves an unsolvable math problem, Dan lauds the film's convention-defying use of time, and Elliott gives the youth a lesson about teetotaling.  0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 2:19 - A noble attempt at professionalism crashes and burns almost immediately.  Also, we explain our mission statement.2:20 - 40:37 - We giggle like grade-school girls over the Bratz movie.40:38 - 43:34 - Final judgements.43:35 - 54:38 - The sad bastards recommend. 54:39 - 57:37 - Podcasty business, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

We devote this Flop House Movie Minute to the ultimate in nostalgia sequels.

In our least-edited show yet we discover that big stars, glossy production values, and a classic story can't save you from being snatch'd by the Flop House, as we discuss The Invasion.  Meanwhile, Elliott tries to sell us on his medical humor, Stuart imagines the sassy sentient skateboard of his dreams, and Dan auditions for several other podcasts.0:00 - 0:35 Introduction and theme0:36 - 2:46 A podcast warning is issued, and a dead-on George Takai impression is met with thundering indifference.2:46 - 40:54 We talk about The Invasion, the latest and least-greatest take on Invasion of the Body Snatchers.  At least Nicole Kidman wears a tight sweater.40:55 - 42:38 Final judgments.42:39 - 55:09 The sad bastards recommend.55:10 - 56:05 Some nonsense about Karate Kid to close the show.56:07 - 58:56 Thanks, podcasty business, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

In the second of our short, supplemental episodes, noted raconteur Stuart Wellington describes his encounter with noted werewolf-hunter Kate Beckinsale.