I Have Some Notes

When we think of director Neill Blomkamp we think of District 9 and not a lot else. While the once up-and-coming director may be short on execution, he's never short on ideas. Elysium is the kind of film tailor-made for this podcast: tons of fun, interesting ideas that don't quite come together. The result? An absolute banger of a show! As we mention in the listener comments section, Sean McKnight sent us a fully realized repitch of Elysium, you can read it here.

Barbarian is a very good movie and we talk about it. Okay, now on to the important stuff. For the last six years, I Have Some Notes has been privileged to be part of the Alberta Podcast Network, the brain-baby of founder Karen Unland. Karen's love for local art built a platform for so many of us to stand on and gave us the opportunity to fund our passion projects. Although the APN ended its operation in March, will be forever grateful to Karen as well as Fawnda Mithrush and Breanne Byrne for their tireless work promoting ours and so many other great Alberta-grown shows. We're also thankful to all our dedicated sponsors whose contributions were crucial to keeping the lights on. But as we say goodbye to the network, a new chapter begins for I Have Some Notes. Today we are excited to announce our show is now sponsored…by YOU! Yes, we have started a Patreon to keep the armchair screenwriting going for many seasons to come. So, if you are able, we humbly ask for a tiny sum of $4 per month. It would mean the world

As 90's action schlock goes, Sylvester Stallone's Judge Dredd is probably better than you remember. The money is all on the screen with great sci-fi sets and a badass animatronic robot. However, we wouldn't be reviewing it on this podcast if it were perfect. The plot is derivative, the villain is boring, and the satire the comic is known for is completely missing. Listen in as we (mostly Liam) add contemporary social commentary and introduce a new criminal element as the backbone for Dredd's wrongful conviction.

John Dies at the End is a delightfully absurd horror comedy, or at least it would be if it had been better produced. Writer and Ph.D. candidate in Media and Cultural Studies, Pete Morley, joins us to relive this beloved web serial turned cult-classic novel turned mediocre movie in a collective effort to punch it up.

Bless the entertainment conglomerate Disney for churning out mediocre movie after middling movie that will keep this podcast well-supplied into the next decade. Perhaps century. What film has Disney brought to the Gods of Rewrites as its next sacrifice? Thor: Love and Thunder. Joining us to reimagine Taika Waittit's second crack at making Marvel magic is comic expert and fellow podcaster Josh Skaar, host of Talking SMAC (Superheroes Movies Animation Comics). Together we seek to eliminate some of the cringe subplots while taking Mjonir-sized swings at a film that is more Mighty Thor than Thor.

Some movies are just made for our podcast. Don't Worry Darling is a beautiful, well-made movie that takes aim at misogyny and the patriarchy in interesting ways but juuuuuuuuust can't quite bring it home. Liam, Gregg and Scott differ on the level of mess Oliva Wilde's film is, but none can deny how engaging it was to watch. And hey, we're glad we did because it was a lot of fun to reimagine some of the twists and character arcs in a way that could've made for a stronger film.

You can have it fast, you can have it cheap, but you can't have it good. That is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze in a half shell. While not necessarily a bad film, this rushed Turtles sequel was a treasure trove of missed opportunities, some of which should have been fairly obvious to the filmmakers, assuming they had the time to read the source material. Liam and Gregg take time to fix some minor issues, while Scott goes for broke with a page-one rewrite that celebrates the 90s cartoon.

It is always a bummer when a movie has a killer premise and completely whiffs. M. Night Shyamalan is back on the show for a second time and up to his usual twisty shenanigans (Shyamanigans?). This time the twist completely undermines his premise and makes us think far too much about the mechanics of his magic beach. Listen in as Liam, Scott and Gregg make one simple change to OLD that helps all the pieces fit more cohesively into place.

Happy New Year, fellow armchair screenwriters! We take a short break from rewriting mediocre movies to talk about some good ones that don't need any rewrites. Liam, Scott and Gregg discuss their top films of the year including one they all agree was a cut above them all.

It's our final movie rewrite of 2022! We hope you're all having a safe, happy holiday curled up in front of the fire listening to us deconstruct and rebuild Edgar Wright's Last Night in Soho. Admittedly this one was a bit intimidating, but ultimately we landed on several solid paths to a more thematically cohesive and perhaps more contemplative film. WARNING! Last Night In Soho deals with themes of sexual violence, as does our discussion. 

Kids movies! Fun light-hearted cinema full of catchy songs that get stuck in your head when your kid plays them over and over and over and sings along with them so loudly you can't think straight and you start to think "is this what losing my mind is like?" but no you haven't lost your mind because it is in fact your soul that is sinking into the inky black abyss with each repetition of the horrid whalings of a broadway singer turned accursed voice actor whose unwanted melodic tones trespass through your ears like those worms from Wrath of KHAAAAAAAAAANN!!!! Anyway, we rewrote Frozen. Enjoy.

We've talked about mediocre X-Men films before, so for The New Mutants we decided to try something a little different. Returning guests and X-Men experts Robyn Slack (Quantuum Kickflip) and Olav Rokne (Unofficial Hugo Book Club Blog) face off against seasoned movie punch-up veterans Scott C. Bourgeois and Gregg Beever in an epic movie pitch battle. Liam Creswick judges this winner-take-all I Have Some Notes slugfest. What spoils await the victor? I donno, pride or something.

While Brendan Fraser is experiencing a well-deserved renaissance, we thought it would be fun to rewind the clock to look back at his heyday in the 90s. George of the Jungle may have not been his strongest starring role, but there are many who still remember it fondly. We, of course, look back and find ways to improve Brendan's role. Cutting a couple of needless subplots and more than a few characters, we streamline George of the Jungle to include more George IN the jungle.

Sequels! We love 'em! They're rarely any good and ripe for re-pitching. In Jaws The Revenge's case the film is really devoid of good shark-related kills and spends far too much time focused on the wrong character. The crew takes turns adding to a new pitch that turns the shark into more of a metaphor before shifting gears into a straight-up supernatural slasher flick.

Ghotbusters: Afterlife may devolve into a cynical cavalcade of nostalgia, but boy what a ride. Glenna Schowalter of the Slugblaster play along podcast Quantum Kickflip joins our cast of armchair screenwriters to punch up a perfectly fine, yet slightly unsatisfying Ghostbusters sequel. Together the paranormal foursome of pretend producers question the need for familial ties to the original cast, while also toying with the idea of making the O.G. proton slingers the villains.

As we all know video game movies are notorious for being great. They are among the most well-written and thoughtful blockbuster movies Hollywood produces, especially in the earlier 2000s when they definitely weren't cynical cash grabs. You'd think Lara Croft: Tomb Raider wouldn't be the kind of film we review, but Angelina Jolie's video game adaptation managed to buck the trend of hit film after hit film. It is salvageable, however, as we manage to add more tomb raiding to this Tomb Raider flick.

It was amazing to see all you armchair screenwriters in chat for our LIVE broadcast of Morbius! For those of you who missed while it was live the episode is archived on here YouTube. Of course, you can also listen to it right here on our podcast feed. Unfortunately Abdul was not able to join us due to a technical issue, but we soldiered on punching up Michael Morbius's relationship with his so-called friend Milo, while also making the film more of a  THE FLY pastiche with requisite R-rated body horror.

We're kicking off season 8 of I Have Some Notes with a killer live show fixing a famous vampiric flop. That's right, armchair screenwriters, it's Morbin' Time! Please join us on Friday, September 16th at 9 PM MDT for our season premier featuring special guest and talented screenwriter, Abdul Malik. LIVE SHOW DETAILS Live Stream Link: https://youtu.be/jSDDOu_HwNI Date: Friday, September 16th Time: 9 PM MDT

Season finale we have reached. Fix A bad movie, we will.  It’s been seven seasons of playing armchair screenwriter on this show, but I dare say no movie has evoked as much emotion and exasperation as The Rise of Skywalker. A deeply flawed movie from start to finish, no director has earned a place on this podcast quite like J.J. Abrams. As we mention in the show, you all came through big on your fixes for this one, and we sadly could not get to them all. However, we did want to highlight two really interesting pitches from listeners that were too long to read on the show: Tak’s Pitch  Sean McKnight’s Pitch Finally, here is a link to How Bad Movies Are Made feat. The Rise of Skywalker, the video Scott mentions at the end of the show. Have a great summer, armchair screenwriters! See you in September.

Danica LeBlanc, Anita Bourgeois, and Erin Beever are back for another podcast takeover, and this time they've brought IHSN veteran Glenna Schowalter with them! The movie? 2018's women-led heist extravaganza, OCEAN'S EIGHT. Together the takeover team works out a new conniving angle for Anne Hathaway's character, as well as adding some much-needed tension when the thieving is at its peak.