Geek Shock

We hope you enjoyed the special edition podcasts while we are gone. But time for being special is OVER. Geek Shock is back in this newsworthy week as we attempt to turn of our dark to bring you into the light. Find out about a lack of Dune, and increase of Tiki, personal 3D (cheap!), the dead crush the competition, beluga cocoa, urine phones, Elijah Tron, net neutrality who(?), Depp in the Shadows, Marvel TV, Marvel Broadway, Marvel Casting, and Comic-Con. Big list: 6 Comic Book Crossovers You Won't Believe Actually Happened from cracked.com

It's GeekShock Special #2: WHAT TO WATCH!  Master Torgo, 80's Jeff, Dr. Vlarg, Deeb and Commander K talk about what poisoned their impressionable young eyes as children and made them the movie and TV-viewing nerds they are today.  Do those tired old shows stand the test of time?  Do those crusty old reels of celluloid even stand a chance against today's ultra-violent hyper-sexual fare?  Let's find out.

It's a GeekShock Special, the first of many!  Master Torgo, 80's Jeff, Dr. Vlarg, Deeb and Commander K talk all about the Games (video games, role-playing games and otherwise) that made them the geeks they are today, and how those games stand up to today's standards.

We at the Ugly Couch Show Network believe that we would be shirking our nerdly duties if we didn't suggest a healthy serving of Moorcock and Dick for your nerdly intake. Go find some now. While you are searching, we'll tell you about such wondrous things as Bevis & Butthhead 3D, Army of Darkness: The Ride, The top American Authors as voted by General Public, political hackings, and so much more. Have you found any Dick yet? I guess you'll just have to settle for Moorcock, then. 

Oh, it's horrible. So many ugly things happened in the world of Geekdom. Our News You Don't Give a S*#t about section is full, FULL! But we won't let it get our spirits down once you get us off the street. Because, when life gives you lemons, you chuck 'em at other people and that's what you get in this week's Geek Shock; Lemons with NUMLOCK! Enjoy. Warning, NUMLOCK is contagious. If you encounter anyone with NUMLOCK contact your local health provider for immediate sterilization. Not kidding. NUMLOCK is serious.

Geek Shock.  It's like no other gadget that you've ever seen.  Cause it's audio!  Today's team takes you on a wondrous journey to worlds where toys turn on their owners, people can't read their cue cards, Michael Jackson gets his own (virtual) planet, Stewart/Colbert get their own rallies, big brother gets bigger, easy date escape, we get an ambassador to space, Flash gets served with a nice Chianti, Black Widow goes solo, Tarantino (and all of us) lose, we go Back to the Theater, and Super Hero costumes feel GREAT!  So put something in it and... well... a treat comes dancing out.

OMG! Did you hear about the time that 80's Jeff and his friend tried to eat a ten pound pizza in 45 minutes? Well, you will on this week's Geek Shock. Besides 80's gastrointestinal issues, you will also learn how not to do cut scenes, how to smell like a book, How to improve the sales of your waning Archie brand, How to screw the people who already overpaid for your processor, how to get Alyssa Milano to be your friend (for 90 days), How DC comics got their movie groove back, How to diversify your zoo, how to waste even more time on WOW, How to embrace your knighthood, How to reason with the Supreme Court, When to buy your used games (answer: quickly, before you can't anymore), how to buy a Stargate, How to spin your Deadpool, and when to say goodbye to an old friend. That's a lotta learnin' and that's just the kind of resume-pumping information you get on this week's GEEK SHOCK.

Welcome back to Geek Shock where we celebrate everything geek, even your creepy cousin who always wears his iPod Shuffle while pumping endless quarters into the old Amidar arcade machine at  Andy's Pizza (downtown location). This week we talk about Pedobear invading SoCal, $178 cheese sandwich, Resident Evil: Afterlife: Aftershocks, Another mastermind pulls an EvE Online, Marvel Anime, Facestar, the Digital Comics Museum, cockroaches, Dead Set comes to America, Dark Tower triumphant, True Lies some more, His name is still Bruce, Free Bree, video games in the Supreme Court, Current Biology, furries, horrible Disney ride ideas, robots in jail, and pumping your own wine. We finish it off with some Dragon*Con missed connections that are not to be missed. So, belly up to the wine pump, it's time for a Geek Shock.

Geek Shock is back firing on all cylinders...even if those cylinders are stting in jail...telling the wrong time.  Topics this week include the Leisure Publishing implosion, mafia (and journalism) problems of Atwater California, Hack is Wack, Journey to the Center of the Island, not a Night's Devil, Duke(?), Dream invades TV, nerd poker, Fcc f's U, Battlestar Hogwarts, respect given to the Dead, Molder Kombat, how to be Superior, we lost another funny guy, BAR2D2, Gears of Charity, did you feel that breeze, and Kinect ho-hum.  That and new special guest (god help us).  Big List: 15 new things we learned about Rockband 3 from PAX. Oh, and yes Deb, Barry ate a salad for dinner.

Hey!  Where did Couchcast go?  Don't fret, buckaroo.  It's right here.  We've given ourselves a new name like the one you give your significant other in your tenderest of moments.  But it's the same sweet smelling geekery, so grab your smelling salts...We're going deep.  Today we discuss improv vs. Killer Instinct, Awesomeness Reminders, Snakes and Lattes, Wii intimacy, Zomb1es everywhere, 3D without annoyance, Xbox Live with annoyance, better controllers for the colorblind, Spiderpaul, saving throw vs Lost Marathon, Maryland State Senator Nancy King is a tool and we'll tell you why, Commodore and a whole lot more, THQ hates you, best headache stories ever, and Lucas/Disney performs fanfic.  Big List: 7 scientific reasons a zombie outbreak would fail. So hide your Ding Dongs and prepare for a GEEK SHOCK!

Paul dives deep into his past to recount the great Game Stop Hold-up of 2005 and the great sphincter Hold-in of 2010. But that's not all. It can't be all! We also bring you the Lineage of Craig Smallwood, Harry Popper, Doggy Poo Story - The Musical, Braga's bragging, Voyager rants, Everything's blog unfriendly in Philadelphia, Futurama's theorem, China's not getting anywhere fast, a Portal to higher education, Locke & Key on teevee, and a vote for Blinky. Big List(s): X-Men: First Class revelations, Paul Scheer's rules for watching Piranha 3D, and the entire play-list for Rockband 3 So pick up that feather and get yourself a treat... It's Couchcast time!

Yeah, we saw Scott Pilgrim and we talk about it miraculously spoiler free.  From there it all goes downhill as we discuss Ray Bradberry and J.D. Salinger, stupid e-mail addys, a Silenter Hill, Star-Ray, a Hamill-less Luke, Klingon opera, Topless Raeliens, the end of a Legacy, X-Platt, Freakin' awesome-enomics, Irrational's Infinite, and phone boy.  Also, prepare to gag (not only from the scatological humor) for the Big List is 25 video game movies in development.  I am filled with loathsome.

Barry returns all scotchified for this look back at the the news that us nerds love.  It's been a bustling week and we've got the podcast to prove it.  This week we discuss Pop-Tarts, Digitized Dance, the raving-idiot rorschach test, the alphabet misunderstood by a bird, a Bakula-less Leap, V-moms, less Star Tube, more Star Cash, a 3 ring binder, all the damn capes, the Gamerator, Scott's Nemesis, paying to be good at games, 404, Donkey Mitchell, poo bug, and taking care of your feet.  Big list: pop culture's 10 most evil trees. Go get that dog away from your toe and tune in to this week's couchcast!

What a rough week.  Barry is down and out after eating some bad sausage, so we make due without him.  A week after Comic-Con and the news well runs dry.  The good news anyway.  But the S#%t news well runs freely and we're all gonna get a big gulp.  This week's topics include Creation Star Trek Convention jerkitude, Transformers the MMO hates you and western civilization, The Outer Limits of MGM, a trip down memory lane for midwestern dark rides, liberal hate costs $40 a year, We Can Remember It For You Again (and more modernish), Panshake, Chocoball sets the record, Superman saves a family - FOR REAL, At The Mountains of Cameron, Johnny Five is a target, Lawyer Thing, (record) - 30 = fraud, a holiday for Civilization, those dark rides we talked about may have never existed, Wii kills corporations, and Bungie rage-kills rage-quitters.  Big List: Taglines to put you off a film.

Comic-con is over for another year, but you can re-live the magic through this brand-spankalicious Couchcast. If you missed it, we take you on the grand tour of the Grand Con in all of it's glory with such highlights as: Pen-face costumes, hot girls look at 80's Jeff Twice(!), Guido the RPG, new Battleship crew, all Avengers assembled, geeks smell the glove, it turns out the Goonies ARE good enuff, getting hit by space rocks, Hamilton goes with Chuck (if she wants to live), more grim grinning ghosts, Keith Urban as Judge Dredd, Vader's Bitchin' Camaro, Nerds make saving throw vs. Phelps, H.G. Wells hates sci-fi, Brad Pitt vs. zombies, Year One kills Ghostbusters 3, purp-ray, and Battlestar minis. Plus the greatest list of all time.... 10 Minor Star Wars Characters with Completely Unnecessary Backstories.

Created from a lab discovered in a basement under our villa, this week's Couchcast gives a 1,2,5 punch to the solar-powered plexus.  It all starts off with the horrible TV shows we still wanna see on DVD.  We only think they're great because we haven't seen them in years.  From there we go on to talk about Comic-Con, Batman Engrish, the madness of King Lee, The madness of fool Phelps, Y the last bathhouse, 8 minutes(!), Darth Vader gets kicked out of the 501st, Bruce Banner gets kicked out of the Hulk, Pekar gets kicked out of life, Tron cares about it's script, Robocop vs. Dexter, D23's film festival,  James Cameron's cash festival,  Kevin's bacon powers, when we get to walk on the Boardwalk Empire, zombiewalk...out of a wrecked car, play MMO and win a sex doll, when I think games-I think Macy's, the FCC's f&#king decision, and Deadpool gets maxed out.  So, join the Whiz Kids on the Phoenix as the Voyagers head to the Saturday Supercade... you Manimal, you. BIg List:  4 slowly occurring annoyances exper

We tried.  We REALLY tried to get through the show without wang jokes.  But, with Paul on the couch... well... we tried.  But with the torrent comes all geek joy you can shake a pink limpie at.  We cover such diverse topics as the highest paid actor is younger than you, smelling like Bruno, Prince says something stupid... again, Titanic-eyed peas, Pee-Wee Apatow, Futurama...FROM THE FUTURE, Hulu-Plus for less, Video Games Live Tour paid for by viewers like you, Twilight finally kills somebody, the Demented web, Wicked Lasers, Sulu sex, Spidercat, place your bets on Who, Iron Sky, unregulated Free Enterprise, Smith's List, the Last Weiniebender, BP: the Home Game, Ebert comes clean, Bieber's Blooper, and Mumra.  A very annoyed Mumra. The Big List:  Top 10 Strangest Museums Ever BTW.  You can't have rubberwang.com . We own it now.

More fun than shoving a Zebra Cake down your gullet, The Ugly Couch Show Couchcast is here for all your nutritional needs.  We'll feed you with classic arcade cabinets, the big Steam sale, Final Dimension5nal Destination, Mafia Wars, Debbie Gibson vs. Tiffany vs. Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, Pattinson the Impaler, Trolls 3, Myers tired, the day we get to Hobbiton, Donner's Woman, Suicide Girls commit Comic-con suicide, Marvel TV guru, Kellogg's waxy box, .xxx, Make-a-Falcon Foundation, Huluplus, Starcraft 2 : Aircraft 2, Saints Row nudity, and everyone's favorite family website: Lemon Party.  Sure we're a little high in slat/fat/cholesterol/nerd but we're cheap and easy to unwrap.  So prepare to bite down hard on this week's episode of Couchcast. The Big List: History's Top 10 E3 Screw-ups

Welcome to the Couchcast where you can have it your way... but don't get crazy.  Our way is inventing new burgers for In and Out Burger, digital license plates, Burger Box, fake iPads, having it your way at SYFY, government pork vs. unicorn, TARDIS for tuppence, Avatar xxx 3D, The Weirding Way, sci-fi prop docs, Shatner talking about Shatner in a film about Shatner directed by Shatner and produced by Shatner, The Boys are back in town, Strange is back in town,  Tron toys, comics go big box, the red dot of death postponement, Lieberman just doesn't get it, the deep philosophy of munching dot, family box, Jack knows you, with a side of puzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzle.   Oh yeah.  Mum-ra. Big List: Top 10 People Who Give Video Games a Bad Name And one person who gives LOVE a bad name.  (Hint: it's you.)

All the boys are back plus one as Deb joins us on this E3 extravaganza.  But that's not all that happened in this Week in Geek as we talk about Keanu Reeves Day, Indy Jones BS, Extra Twilight, Laser Tag apps, Cageflix, Rockband 3, Kinect and it's games library, new price points, Castlevania, Twisted Starfox, 3DS, Back to the Future games, The return of Manos, Touchdown Jesus is burning, the origin of the great and powerful Oz, the price of homework in Massachusetts,  Starfleetclix, Mickey and Wolvie, Doctor Vampire Hunter, the thing before the Thing, and Mum-Ra in this super-full couchcast.  So put down your Wiener Games and listen up kiddos. Big List:  Nothing.  There is no third thing