"solutions...with Courtney Anderson!"™

SITE: http://www.courtneyanderson.com/swca-episode-108-joyful-art-of-business-series-we-are-afraid-to-care-too-much-for-fear-that-the-other-person-does-not-care-at-all.html SHOW NOTES: This episode is part of our JOYFUL ART OF BUSINESS™ series. Our episode topic is, “We are afraid to care too much, for fear that the other person does not care at all.” - Eleanor Roosevelt (longest serving First Lady of the US) I have previously shared another Eleanor Roosevelt quote. It is, “We all know people who are so much afraid of pain that they shut themselves up like clams in a shell and, giving out nothing, receive nothing and therefore shrink until life is a mere living death.” - Eleanor Roosevelt We have all suffered in our own way when it comes to the issue of caring. Some people have “too much” where they feel stifled and smothered by the affection from others. Some people have “too little” where they feel isolated and alone without anyone caring for them. Most people are in the middle where they have some peopl

Our LAW LOVER'S LOUNGE™ series addresses a general overview of some of the most important issues to the general public! Attorney Courtney E. Anderson has owned a general practice law firm since 1998 in Texas, USA. There is no client relationship created between this show and Attorney Courtney E. Anderson, or The Law Offices of Courtney E. Anderson (Litigation-Mitigation.com). These disclaimers are very important. The content in these shows is for general educational purposes and is not the delivery of legal services. This episode is, “What are my Free Speech rights at work? Tell me!” 1) What are your Free Speech rights in society at large? Are people legally guaranteed free speech? For example, in the USA the right to Free Speech is in the federal constitution. It states, “AMENDMENT I - Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to peti

In the MYTH WARRIORS™ series we are targeting ideas to begin to assess whether they are credible or not (i.e., they are a myth, fallacy or even a lie). The target for this episode is,  “Attractive people make more money than unattractive people!” Consider:  - “Why do you think beautiful people earn more? Hamermesh: People may more attention to them, listen to them better.” (http://www.cbsnews.com/news/how-your-looks-affect-your-salary/) - “People who were rated as good-looking made more money, were better educated, and were more confident. But a person’s intelligence affected their income more than their looks did. […T]he effects of self-concept are particularly noteworthy. Its effects on income are stronger than those of attractiveness and nearly as strong as those of intelligence (http://www.webmd.com/beauty/20090520/want-a-higher-salary-get-brains-beauty) - “Attractive people earn about 5 percent more in hourly pay than their average-looking colleagues, who in turn earn 9 percent more per hour than th

Our MANAGEMENT MAGICIANS™ series is dedicated to the “magic” that a talented manager is able to create. Our topic is, “Critical thinking staff or obedient staff? Pick only one.” Who cares? “No. 1 Critical Thinking (found in 9 out of the 10 most in-demand jobs)” (http://www.forbes.com/sites/meghancasserly/2012/12/10/the-10-skills-that-will-get-you-a-job-in-2013/) What is it? Critical thinking: The objective analysis and evaluation of an issue in order to form a judgment (http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/critical-thinking) Obedience: Compliance with an order, request, or law or submission to another’s authority: (http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/obedience) What’s the problem? "A survey of HR professionals [...] found that a full 70 percent of employees with a high school education were deficient in critical thinking skills. Even among employees with a four-year college education, 9 percent were deficient in critical thinking skills, [...] and o

This episode is part of our JOYFUL ART OF BUSINESS™ series wherein we explore how to combine the positive benefits of our professional endeavors (“business”) with the overall positive emotional return on our efforts (“joy”). The act of engaging in professional endeavors, in any capacity (i.e., as an employee, employer, entrepreneur, contractor, volunteer, paid, full time, part time, intermittently, etc.) is an expression of our ideas and creative talents (“art”). In this episode we are exploring the specific topic of, “I am not here by accident. I am here by MY choice.”  I often hear from people, “They don’t want me to be here.” This is usually in regards to workplace issues and the point is that the person is stressed out because “they” don’t want them to be in the meeting, in the job title, etc. The challenge is that we are where we are by choice. We are not “here” (at work, in our personal relationships, etc.) by accident. We make the decision every single day to be here. That is our decision (we are “the

In our HELP! SITUATION SPOTLIGHT™ series, we shine the light on challenges that community members have shared with me. This episode is, “Do smart gals and nice guys finish last? I am Successful at Work! So, Why am I Single?” Tremendous changes in society have impacted traditional gender roles and expectations.  Women used to be excluded from individual accomplishment (by law and/or custom). In the past, even the most ambitious woman had to achieve her goals through a male relative (parent or spouse most often). Thus, traditional females traded their “support” for a “provider” and vice versa. There were obstacles to leaving the relationship as there was a high level of dependency. The challenge is that when a modern female (a smart gal) is their own “provider” where does that leave her? Where does it leave a potential mate? What about a modern male (a nice guy) who is not able to “provide” millions of dollars? They are in a fantastic place where they have the freedom to be loved for who they are versus what

In the MYTH WARRIORS™ series we are targeting ideas to begin to assess whether they are credible or not (i.e., they are a myth, fallacy or even a lie). The target for this episode is, “I am an INTJ (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator).” (Or, am I?) What is it? “More than 10,000 companies, 2,500 colleges and universities and 200 government agencies in the United States use the test. It’s estimated that 50 million people have taken the Myers-Briggs personality test[.] MBTI is their framework for classifying personality types along four distinct axes: introversion vs. extroversion, sensing vs. intuition, thinking vs. feeling and judging vs. perceiving. […] For example, he might be introverted, a sensor, a thinker and a perceiver. Or, in Myers-Briggs shorthand, an “ISTP.” How is it used and why should I care about it? “Today, organizations administer the personality test to employees, then use the results as a basis for training programs." Is it credible? “No major journal has published research on the MBTI, which ac

In our HELP! SITUATION SPOTLIGHT™ series, we shine the light on challenges that community members have shared with me. This episode is, “REJECTION. How do I handle it?” The dream job that you desperately desired and did not get. The new romantic relationship that you knew was “the one” that dissipated into a cruel void of emptiness. The “forever” friendship that ended abruptly. REJECTION. In all of its forms it is searingly painful and brings to the surface the most powerful emotional responses possible. Why did they get the job/work assignment/ promotion and  not you? Why are they dating them and not you? What is wrong with you? What could (or should) you have done differently? Rejection has the potential to trigger deeper issues within ourselves and bring historical abandonments and rejections (parents, past jobs, past personal relationships, etc.) roaring to life to wreak havoc in our minds and our behavior. We could enter into the downward and destructive spiral of telling ourselves, “You are never good

SITE: http://www.courtneyanderson.com/swca-episode-100-hr-heroes-hangout-series-what-does-employment-at-will-really-mean.html SHOW NOTES: From our HR HEROES HANGOUT series, this episode is, "What does "employment at will" really mean? Short Answer: An employee may quit, or be fired, at any time with or without notice or cause. Longer Answer (from http://www.ncsl.org/research/labor-and-employment/at-will-employment-overview.aspx): "I. The At-Will Presumption Employment relationships are presumed to be ?at-will? in all U.S. states except Montana. The U.S. is one of a handful of countries where employment is predominantly at-will. Most countries throughout the world allow employers to dismiss employees only for cause. A. At-Will Defined At-will means that an employer can terminate an employee at any time for any reason, except an illegal one, or for no reason without incurring legal liability. Likewise, an employee is free to leave a job at any time for any or no reason with no adverse legal consequences. A

This episode is part of our JOYFUL ART OF BUSINESS™ series wherein we explore how to combine the positive benefits of our professional endeavors (“business”) with the overall positive emotional return on our efforts (“joy”). Our episode topic is, “What they call you is one thing. What you answer to is something else.” - Lucille Clifton This quote is pragmatic and powerful. I do not have the power to change the hearts and minds of other people. I do not have the power to to stop people from saying things that are hurtful, cruel and abusive. I have been called more insulting names than I can remember in my life. This quote is a reminder that what someone else calls us is not our issue, it is what we answer to that matters.  Here is another quote from Lucille Clifton, “come celebrate with me that everyday something has tried to kill me and has failed.” - Lucille Clifton  Again, the strident self image of the episode title quote resonates. We have more to rejoice in our lives than we acknowledge. You and I det

Our MANAGEMENT MAGICIANS™ series is dedicated to those exceptional few who step forward to serve as guides, sages and responsible parties for others in pursuit of the greater good for society and their organization! These are managers who redefine their job titles to ensure their own personal contentment as they motivate, monitor and mentor their team members each day. The “magic” that a talented manager is able to create changes their lives, the lives of their team members and ripples throughout the larger society. We salute their sacrifices and share their techniques and “secrets” to achieving sustained positive experiences for themselves, clients, customers, peers, team members, and the public at large!  In this episode our topic is, “How to Successfully Manage People that You Do Not (Really) Like!” Some people we love, some we like, some we tolerate and some we do everything in our power to never be around! That is life for all of us. In our professional lives, we understand that we are going to have in

In our HELP! SITUATION SPOTLIGHT™ series, we shine the light on challenges that community members have shared with me. This episode is, “He hasn’t called! What does it mean?” Silence. Often a craved for retreat from the noise and chaos of the world. Yet, it can be a perceived enemy depriving us of an opportunity to realize our deepest professional and personal desires. When the phone doesn’t ring, what does it mean?  The parallels between our personal and professional lives are helpful and insightful at times. When we are waiting for a call to let us know we have a job (or a second interview) or that we have a second date, it can be stressful and scary. Some people are tempted to turn their anxiety about “waiting for an answer” inwards against themselves. They will criticize and insult what they wore, what they said, how they looked, etc., and begin to place the blame on themselves for the awful silence.  Some people escalate the anxiety into inappropriate (or even illegal) behavior and “follow-up” to “mak

In our HELP! SITUATION SPOTLIGHT™ series, we shine the light on challenges that community members have shared with me. This episode is, “How do I know if someone is really my friend?” Ah, friendship. The bond that forms where we are safe to share our secrets, fears and dreams. We take off our “masks” that we use with the world (to protect us) and we share our authentic selves. The bliss of spending time with a true friend is one of the best parts of life. Yet, what about the painful experience of letting our guard down, sharing our authentic selves, trusting a person and then later having to face the fact that we were deceived, tricked and manipulated by the person we trusted? We are broken as a person when our trust is broken. How may we ensure that we have “real” friends in our lives while preventing being hurt and made a fool of by “pretend” friends? Q: How do I know if someone is really my friend? A: The behavior of a friend is based on the foundation that your happiness is their happiness. Any behavi

In the MYTH WARRIORS™ series we are targeting ideas to begin to assess whether they are credible or not (i.e., they are a myth, fallacy or even a lie). The target for this episode is, “Nobody can teach me who I am.”  “Born in Nigeria in 1930, Chinua Achebe attended the University of Ibadan. In 1958, his groundbreaking novel Things Fall Apart was published. It went on to sell more than 12 million copies and been translated into more than 50 languages. Achebe later served as the David and Marianna Fisher University professor and professor of Africana Studies at Brown University in Providence, Rhode Island. He died on March 21, 2013, at age 82, in Boston, Massachusetts.”  (http://www.biography.com/people/chinua-achebe-20617665#awesm=~oDpf0csGuWAzTf ) The larger quote for our episode is, “Nobody can teach me who I am. You can describe parts of me, but who I am - and what I need - is something I have to find out myself.” Option 1 - People can teach you who you are. Option 2 - Nobody can teach you who you are.

In the MYTH WARRIORS™ series we are targeting ideas to begin to assess whether they are credible or not. We are warriors fighting to establish clarity between what is accurate and what is simply a myth (or falsehood) in life. Our topic is, “You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” - Eleanor Roosevelt (longest serving First Lady of the US) What do other people really think of me? They don't. This may sound blunt but the obsession with perceptions of what other people think about us is difficult for me to understand. Most of us spend our waking hours on our own lives (what we are doing, feeling, etc.). The belief that we are forefront in the minds of other people (beyond our closest loved ones) is narcissistic. There are stages of human development that we all experience (to some extent) as adolescents where we are learning to define ourselves and are focused on our peer feedback. The continuation of this behavior into adulthood is not going to result in

Our MANAGEMENT MAGICIANS™ series is dedicated to those exceptional few who step forward to serve as guides, sages and responsible parties for others in pursuit of the greater good for society and their organization! These are managers who redefine their job titles to ensure their own personal contentment as they motivate, monitor and mentor their team members each day. The “magic” that a talented manager is able to create changes their lives, the lives of their team members and ripples throughout the larger society. We salute their sacrifices and share their techniques and “secrets” to achieving sustained positive experiences for themselves, clients, customers, peers, team members, and the public at large!  In this episode our topic is, “SUPERSTARS!! How to make them stay and not burn-out!”  Burnout: “the condition of someone who has become very physically and emotionally tired after doing a difficult job for a long time" (Merriam-Webster Dictionary) What is a “Superstar” employee? The best. “A players” wh

This episode is part of our JOYFUL ART OF BUSINESS™ series wherein we explore how to combine the positive benefits of our professional endeavors (“business”) with the overall positive emotional return on our efforts (“joy”). The act of engaging in professional endeavors, in any capacity (i.e., as an employee, employer, entrepreneur, contractor, volunteer, paid, full time, part time, intermittently, etc.) is an expression of our ideas and creative talents (“art”). In this episode we are exploring the specific topic of, “I am bored. Is this all there is to life?” You are fortunate and know it. You have enough money to pay your bills and even afford a few nice “extra treats” at times (vacation, going out to dinner, etc.). Yet, you feel a nagging feeling as you wake up each day and do the same thing over and over again.  You are not sad. You are not ungrateful for this good life when so many people are trapped in famine, civil war, natural disasters and other horrible circumstances. You know that it is a wonder

In our HELP! SITUATION SPOTLIGHT™ series, we shine the light on challenges that community members have shared with me. This episode is, “I do my job and their job! Am I a SUPERSTAR or a SUCKER?!” Are you a SUPERSTAR (the best, an overachiever, etc.)? Or, are you someone that is being taken advantage of (a “SUCKER”)? What is the difference? A Superstar is measured by their results (higher/ better/ more/ compared to their peers) and is an overachiever. An overachiever is achieving over and above their peers (early promotion, bigger pay raise, awards, recognition, etc.). The key is the achieving aspect. They have results at work that are more than their peers (more pay, bigger office, better schedule, rewards, etc.). If you are salesperson of the month every month (with the highest commissions in the office) and you love it, you might be a superstar! If you are paid equal to (or less than) your peers, your reviews are average and you are toiling away in obscurity (no promotion, no raise, etc.), you are not a s

In the MYTH WARRIORS™ series we are targeting ideas to begin to assess whether they are credible or not (i.e., they are a myth, fallacy or even a lie). The target for this episode is, “Only 6% of all individuals in the US earn $100,000 USD a year!? Really?” (Really.) The six-figure income threshold. It is bandied about in popular culture and media. It represents a demarcation of “success” (or does it?). How many people actually earn six-figure individual income per year in the US? Why does this matter? Well, if the majority of people in the US earn $100,000 or more and you earn $30,000 you are far below average and you may understand better how much you would need to increase your individual annual income to equal what the average individual earns. On the other hand, if you earn $100,000 or more and you feel like you “don’t have enough money” that may be accurate if the reality is that the majority of people earn $300,000 a year (you feel broke because you earn substantially less than the average individual)

This episode is part of our FINANCIAL FIERCENESS!™ series! This series integrates our financial goals into our development plan for surpassing our goals. We deal with the specific issues we need to explore in order to achieve (and surpass) our financial goals. This episode is, “Rich” on $1,800 USD (or less) a month? Really!? How?”  Imagine, you have at least $300 USD per week to spend on whatever you want. All of your bills are paid. You have your own home and all of your bills are paid (including health costs, medicine, etc.). You have an “extra” $300 USD to use per week on whatever you desire. Go out to eat, to the movies, visit a friend out of town. Buy yourself something nice to wear. You are in charge. $1,800 - necessary expenses (property tax, water, electricity, gas, internet, etc.) of $600 per month = $1,200 per month/ $300 per week “extra”  But, I could spend $1,800 on one dress! Or, one meal at a fancy restaurant! Or, one bottle of wine! This show is stupid and ridiculous! You can spend how much