Unbreak My Heart

Katie was on autopilot and set to marry her college boyfriend - that was THE PLAN for a young woman in Southern Georgia. He blindsided her and broke up with her at the end of their senior year.  Feeling lost and confused, she hesitantly accepted an invitation to a women's bible study. There was a story that ended up changing her life forever and eventually led her to a different lifestyle. One that wasn't filled with binge drinking, proving herself or looking for a man to make her feel fulfilled.  Many lessons were learned from her experience - so much so - that she wrote a book and became a speaker reaching out to other college age women, encouraging them not to settle for relationships that don't serve or edify them. To find out more about Katie check out her site: www.katiebulmer.life and her IG @katiebulmer.life

Liz is in the wake of her recent breakup. She is an empath and a warrior for love. Her man, a narcissist. He tried to let her go, but would keep coming back. In the end, he didn't choose her. Liz has done many productive things to move on like reading books and looking for lessons yet it's hard to shake the sadness and anxiety. They cross paths often and seeing him keeps her feeling bound to him. We explore all of this at length and discuss strategies for navigating the inevitable run-in's and self-care. If you'd like to learn more about Liz and her educational consulting services please visit www.elizabethlangs.com. You can follow her on IG @elizabethlangs. Some recommended books:  5 Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely by Lysa TerKeurst  

My good friend Kari and I dive into the heart of what happens after heartache. Her husband cheated on her which ended in divorce after 12 years of marriage. Throughout years of processing grief, learning to forgive, and walking hundreds of miles she found peace and contentment. She's been single a while now, embracing the new challenges of trusting herself, love, and a potential new partner one day.  Kari Gale is an artist and writer from Portland, Oregon specializing in the documentation of the journey, food, and travel. Visit her at karigale.com to see her journal art, books, and much more.

Zeke is a friend of mine, originally from Argentina. He was brave enough to be my first guest, before I really knew how the flow of the show would go.  I love this conversation with Zeke as it is full of wisdom and insight. We talk about the basics of breaking up, what happens when we try and protect others from pain and some universal ways to recover from heartache. Chocolate may be a key ingredient! Do you have a favorite comfort food to help you through the pain? 

What do you do when you know better? When, somehow someone finds their way past your shield and you let them in, even though you sense they're not safe. Bailey found herself in a time of life transition, let her guard down - and let him in. As she suspected the worst happened and she's stuck with the angst of making a mistake she could've avoided. In this episode we talk about how she got here and how she can practice letting go of - not just this man, but old beliefs that fight to keep her down.

This interview with Katelyn is two stories in one. First, it’s very fresh - she lost her Swedish fiancé only 3 months ago. In her closet now hangs the wedding dress she’ll never wear. She was blindsided by his sudden change of heart. To understand her breakup - we have to hear the back story   The second half of this interview we start more of a dialogue to process what may have been happening along the way that got overlooked. We work on adopting a new perspective in order to heal and move forward. Chew on the concept of love and commitment. Are they one in the same? Can you have one and not the other? 

Jake found the love of his life at a young age. He was content being her man without getting married. Why get married and risk the pain of divorce? He saw what it did to his parents and wanted to avoid in his life. She convinced him otherwise and ... it didn't go so well. We take a deep dive into those patterns and pull out some strong aha's! Listen to find out what happens and even learn what some of your survival patterns might be.

You are in for a ride with Lizz's story. It's filled with tragedy and trauma that Lizz is in the midst of healing from. You'll learn how she's been coping with grief and what happens when her soulmate and best friend, G breaks her heart.  Lizz is also the Nutress of the World! She founded Goodnuss, a nut milk innovation company providing affordable access to fresh plant-based beverages for the first time. Check it out at milkyournuts.com

It's time to plan for college and think about what's going to happen next for Tanner and his girlfriend. She was the one for him and making choices to prioritize the relationship was a no-brainer.  Those choices were sacrifices. He could've gone to a really great school for his talents and scholarships, instead he stayed local for her. Well, the worst happened. She changed her mind and moved out of state. It was too late for him, he was locked-in to a local school. Shortly after college started, she called and broke up with him.  He's been heart broken and angry. This is just more loss, more pain. He lost a cousin to suicide. He lost is future wife to thin air... it's too much to unpack, too many tough emotions. He's found weed and music help him cope but they don't help him move forward.  Tanner is exhausted from carrying around all this pain. He's also brave! We go deep into the dark and Tanner emerges with a breakthrough - truly a change of heart and release from his baggage. You'll be inspired!  

Young, insecure and longing for attention, Kalei falls for a boy during college orientation. It could be love at first sight, he even seems to like her back.  This is a story of a CRUSH. Both Kalei and David fall for each other but never really put themselves out there to truly come together. Instead, they dip their toe into relationship status for 2 weeks and quickly bail - only to become best friends...for years. Time passes, they move to different cities and have new relationships. Yet, Kalei can't shake David from her thoughts. Apparently David can't shake Kalei either, even though he's been in a long term relationship. Kalei and I cover a lot of ground about her family, her insecurities, and it gets intense when we start unpacking some of her true motives and desires. Kalei likes to hide from the whole truth to protect herself. I won't let her though. Listen to find out what happens!

Lacey’s story is quite non-linear.  She started out as a wild college girl whose daily lifestyle included drinking, using drugs and endless partying. Sex was like a sport, a game to win - the more men, the more power, the more she knew she was wanted and desired. After college, she found herself falling in love with a music dj, Thomas. Thomas was a high school dropout also deep into drinking, drugs and partying. Their love was immediate, within a week they knew they’d get married.  They gave up drinking and drugs for a temporary time together - to cleanse and detox. They even promised to wait to have sex until they got hitched. Not much else changed - they still went to the parties and still chilled with the same friends.  Marriage happened. They invited a woman in to the relationship as a sexual partner. A month passed, they agreed to end it with the paramour. However, Thomas didn’t let her go. He started seeing her behind his wife’s back.  We get to hear: how Lacey’s bad trip on mushrooms was a come to Jesu

B is a young Lebanese-American man whose family is originally from Lebanon. Even though he thinks he's generally a good person, he finds himself wrestling with an internal monster.  He first noticed this monster of rage when he dated Brenda. Maybe she created the monster? But after they broke up that monster came out again in other relationships. Now B is looking inward. At his lowest moments he finds himself behaving in ways that's hurtful to others and he doesn't know how to change. Stick with us as we explore the roots of this rage monster. You may find yourself thinking this guy sounds spoiled and entitled - this guy is a jerk to women - I don't need to listen to this. Hang in there because what it sounds like on the surface is just a cover for some deep family pain.  Together B and I go to some of the hidden core pain in his heart and in his body. Together we start the inner-healing process. I am so proud and impressed with B - he took a deep dive into some very vulnerable places. The reward - breakthrou

Goodness! This is a great story of a woman who went through the "school of life" because of a 6 year relationship with a man who broke her heart 3 times.  Remanda is a strong, determined and "don't quit -> win" kinda girl. When she started dating for the first time she gave 200%. Being from China, her culture affected many of the decisions she made, especially about how to pursue a career, how to see herself and how to value a relationship.  What does it take to finally say goodbye? What can happen to make you give up 6 yrs of history and life together? He promised to show up for her surgery and when the time came - not a whisper of his whereabouts or glimpse of his presence. At first his absence was due to oversleeping from playing video games into the the wee morning hours. Then his absence extending into the next day out of shame and fear for messing up big time! At that point Remanda knew there was no coming back.  Our conversation is extensive. We get to know a lot about her life story which was largely

Kristen is 43 and finds herself in a time of tremendous personal growth. She found herself dating someone whose better than others, yet, not quite right either. She had common thoughts like "if I only I could change him, than he'd be marriage material..." hoping for something that was highly unlikely.  Her man didn't make many promises but he did seem to lead her on and ask for more than she was comfortable giving ... only to soon thereafter say "I'm sorry, I wish I could be that man for you, but I can't". Book-ended between the place of longing, biological and spiritual pressures and self-confidence, she gradually built up the inner-strength needed to tell him NO MORE. It's a tough spot - where loneliness begs for relief, and your heart is quick to ignore the gentle voice of intuition warning you of danger. This year or so of dating someone, however, was not without purpose. She had some positive take aways. Most important of all, Kristen has become a stronger individual, a stronger woman and a stronger part

They were never an "official" couple. They met on a dating app and for Elise, there were a lot of firsts: the first partner that was a woman, the first person that accepted her ace identity with understanding, the first woman she was genuinely sexually attracted too... Over a year went by before it was clear this wasn't going to evolve into something more. Not a bite of reality Elise wanted to digest. Though they've cut off all communication, Elise hasn't found the closure she needs to fully move on.  The conversation goes beyond the topic of her breakup. We talked about dating and she discovered her lack of attraction to men, how she navigated a breakup with her first boyfriend. We talked about learning to accept yourself with all the different ways we try to fit in to the world and so much more! By the end of our conversation, we find the core of what's holding her back and how she can find liberty! Listen to hear what happens.  

Sometimes our first relationship leaves a near eternal impact on our day to day in the here and now. Annie's first love started out as a Dragon ball z character. This unlikely match evolved from mystery, to pen pals and eventually to love.  They had a long distance relationship between Florida and Connecticut. With the distance it took time to get to see and embrace the inherent inter-personal problems. In spite of the romance, the trust and friendship - deep down they knew it wasn't going to work.  Even when we might know the truth, it doesn't mean we're willing to see it. Two years after their breakup, while spring cleaning, the truth hit home like a ton of bricks. Listen as Annie and I discuss the next steps to gain closure.    

Keri and I mined through a life changing relationship she had with an abusive ex-boyfriend. Her gut told her no but her infatuation ignored that still-small voice deep inside.  It's been awhile a since they were together yet there are still lingering injuries from what happened between them. This conversation is rich with heart-felt memories, insights, wisdom, lessons learned and encouragement!  You will find a piece of yourself somewhere along the way in our chat. Listen and allow your heart to be uplifted and inspired - and - find your way through suffering to hope!

Kerry and I's conversation flowed with casual ease and laughter. Can you start over in your mid-30's as a divorcee and single Mom? Yes! What about navigating the mystery and terrors of online dating? Kerry shares about diving in, finding new liberties and navigating the disappointments and hopes of possible new relationships.  Listen to be entertained and inspired.

Jason is a soft spoken and responsible young man whose ultimate goal was to keep a smile on his girl’s face.  He shares about how he comprised his own values by allowing his girlfriend to talk him into group sex.  Disclaimer, he talks openly about their sexuality. This was a tough story to hear, Jason struggles with standing up for himself. Listening to someone get repeatedly taken advantage of is painful. There are a lot of lessons learned and with Jason’s humble mindset and desire for personal growth - you’ll find yourself rooting for his success!

Lindsey's story is sharp with wisdom, moments of relatability and insight. In less than a year's time with her boyfriend, she thought they would get married.  After one fight, he said "he wanted out". Was that just emotion or did he mean it? They stayed together, but it was rocky, eventually leaving them estranged. Lindsey found herself in second and shorter unhealthy relationship leaving her wrecked with questions. Questions that have led to healing, positive life changes and hope!