#parenting…who?

In this last episode for season 1 of #Parenting…Who? Podcast Julie takes a bit of time in the intro today to talk about her podcasting experience and an idea moving forward for a season 2 episode. Our guest in today’s podcast is Traci Pirri from homeforthejourney.org. Traci is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker from Austin Texas. She coaches families and individuals on all parts related to the adoption triad – the adopted parent, the adoptee as well as birth parent support. Traci has an interesting perspective as an adoptive parent herself and listen as she delves into the intricate and often times sensitive areas of taking that huge leap of faith called adoption – whatever that may look like for you. Be sure to leave a comment in iTunes for #Parenting…Who? Podcast – we want to hear from you! And stay tuned for season 2 which will be launched later in the Fall of 2018. Thank you for your on-going support. Show Notes

Meet Babita Spinelli in today’s podcast! Babita is a Licensed Psychotherapist/Psycholanalyst who practices in New York and New Jersey, USA. A quote from her website “Everything has changed and yet I am more me than I have ever been” by Ian Thomas; this quote really resonated with me (read it again, it’s a deep one!) when I was preparing for today’s interview. Babita shares a personal story about how she committed to doing her own personal work, navigating her own life. As she found herself she noticed how things were changing really helped her to be more connected with who she was. The unfolding of this journey can be huge for those who work through the therapy process. Babita also shares how her love of doors informed the naming of her practice in a unique and special way! Show Notes

In the last of our 5 part series on Unpacking Eating Disorders Sarah Terwilligar discusses parental self-reflection and the importance of being healthy and seeking one’s own support. Supporting a loved one struggling with eating and/or an eating disorder can be really difficult. Noticing how and what you say verbally and non-verbally has an impact on the child/youth in your environment and this includes things like dieting. Children and teens should not be dieting and reflecting on your desire to “diet” and all that comes with this has an impact. Increasing your awareness about what is difficult for the child or youth, especially around family dinners, special holidays, celebrations and traditions or going shopping or out for dinner as a family is key as well. Show Notes

In the 4th of our 5 part series on Unpacking Eating Disorders Sarah Terwilligar discusses - What is an eating disorder symptom, how symptoms are hidden and what this looks like i.e. smearing. We talk as well about learning how to observe and what to look for and the importance of understanding eating disorders first so that you can better observe and understand the symptoms for your child which is one of the foundational reasons we created the Eating Disorder Caregiver Coaching Group! Understanding more about the mentality of getting rid of nutrition so it doesn’t go in their body, the if I don’t eat it all that’s better (in the case of restriction). And the dangerous effects of pro-Ana websites on social media – what they are and what their intention is. NOTE: This episode could be triggering**

In today’s episode you will meet Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor Alicia Bradley from Chicago, IL. We have an extensive chat in today’s episode including Alicia’s work with foster and adoptive families and supporting the unique challenges these families face. We also discuss a bit about our online clinical work (we both work with kids!) as well as her after card work with young adults who have aged out of the system – what this means and what the unique challenges they face are, especially when it comes to relationships. Alicia also speaks about her Dialectical Behaviour (DBT) work as well as Oppositional Defiance Disorder and the unique challenges (many power struggles) with this dynamic. Show Notes

This is the third of a four part series with Rick Kelly. Today we carry on the conversation related to Parenting the Restorative Way. Rick speaks about the key role of relationships is to be intentional and learn about a growth mindset rather than a fixed mindset and why focusing on accomplishments rather than effort is not helpful in the bigger picture. Some youth are challenged with transitional points in their development i.e. graduating high school where they may have been able to achieve many things but lack a sense of ability about how they could do what they did. Unfortunately this lagging can become a crisis situation for the individual as well as the family as it can happen very quickly. Show Notes

Linda Meier Abdelsayed grew up in Germany and France. After graduating from the American School of Paris in 2004, she moved to the U.K. and received a Bachelor of Arts in Music and Psychology in 2007. She then moved to California and graduated from Pepperdine University with a Masters in Clinical Psychology in 2009. Since graduating Pepperdine, she has worked with the Los Angeles Department of Mental Health, Regional Centers, Insurance Companies, and Private paying clients. In addition to her clinical experience, she has also been an Adjunct Practicum Professor at Pepperdine University in their Masters in Clinical Psychology program guiding and supporting students to make strong clinical decisions as they learn to become therapists themselves. Linda is licensed in both California and Illinois. See Show Notes

Have you struggled with an unpleasant experience with pleasure and/or your sexuality? Today my conversation with Tracy Montgomery, a Certified Sexological Bodyworker and somatic sex educator helps to normalize why pleasure is important in your life. How uncomfortable is not unsafe and what this means including the notion that we can trust ourselves to know when something is right. Tracy talks about getting turned onto life and how we can change the world when we feel good about ourselves. We also talk about being mindful, present and in the moment and how something like shame disconnects us from being present in our own body. Shame is pleasure interrupted in our bodies – when we avoid the bad stuff we can’t feel the good. Show Notes

Dr. Liz Bonet has her own successful podcast series known as Hypnotize Me with over 50,000 downloads! She discusses with me today what led her towards hypnotherapy work through her own experience with an urge that came up in her parenting style that contradicted who she wanted to be as a parent. Dr. Bonet intuitively sought out support in this area and was able to process things to the point this subconscious urge become much less afterwards. This is the goal of hypnotherapy ~ retrieving a different answer and aligning subconscious with conscious. She speaks about the processes of doing hypnotherapy and core healing work and why this is important to your role as a parent in your child's life. Learn how the work of core healing hypnosis can help you heal your own (old) wounds. Show Notes: https://julieclarketherapy.com/parenting-who-podcast/episode-17-inner-child-work-and-hypnosis/

Evelyn is a Registered Social Worker with a Master in Social Work and a Master of Arts in International Development Studies. She shares how her passion for helping people turned into a job working in a men's homeless shelter. Together we discuss the importance of self in a helping relationship, working with a vulnerable population requires this! A homeless men's shelter is one place where self-loathe is ever present. Evelyn discusses how she works with helping men identify the self-hate they carry with them and how aligning negative behaviours with personal values; personal values that may first need to be discovered. She also discusses the importance of language and how we miss the opportunity to connect with someone through making assumptions and using language that has different meanings for both people. Discussing the impact of family of origin and why understanding, not blaming, family of origin plays a role towards recovery.

Amanda practices as a Licensed Clinical Social Work in Connecticut, U.S.A. Julie and Amanda met in a forum for Online Therapists and share a conversation with you between two therapists. Amanda shares about her draw to become a therapist, the influence in her life as well as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy as a solution to some traumatic experiences. Show Notes: Mindset: The New Psychology of Success The Power of Vulnerability EMDR defined

My guest today is once again Rick Kelly. This is the second of a 4 part series. Rick discusses shame and how what happens to our child/youth also happens to us as their parents. How we can't protect our kids in all circumstances - how we must check in with ourselves and help them learn how to be in the driver's seat of their life! Read Show Notes here: julieclarketherapy.com

What I have realized is the interviews and connections with my guests are so rich with information that we can not possibly do just one episode. Rick is no exception! Rick is a fellow colleague and Child and Youth Care Practitioner. He has over 40 years working as a child and youth worker and prides himself on thinking outside the box using innovation, creativity, prevention, health promotion, advocacy and systems change. In our time in this first episode Risk provides some insight into how he accidentally fell into the world of Restorative Practice and how this newfound knowledge opened many doors, paradigms and ways of looking at things and he hasn't turned back since. To learn more about Restorative Practice and within the context of parenting your child I guarantee you won't look back. Restorative Practice is an extremely powerful practice that can change lives, build and connect communities and dare I say truly make a difference in a world that is open and welcomes this practice.

NOTE: This episode could be triggering** This is episode three of our series, together with my colleague Sarah Terwilligar, we continue to discuss elements of our new virtual eating disorder caregiver coaching group program. In this episode we are going to discuss Understanding the Eating Disorder, helping caregivers with understanding, from a practical lens, what it is like to not just have an eating disorder but also understanding the eating disorder voice, symptoms and the reason empathy is so important. Thank you for tuning in! Please subscribe to auto-download new episodes to your listening device. After you listen to a few episodes, please consider leaving an honest rating and review of the podcast. All feedback welcome! Follow Me on Facebook and Twitter parentingwhopodcast.com

Evanye shares how she came to about her work in 'The Self Love Center', a space she created for people pleasers, worriers, over-thinkers and people tired of doing the same old things in their life. For people who describe themselves as unhappy and just want to be free from pain, hurt and fear. Are 'core wounds' running the show for you? Evanye speaks about how having friction in your life is necessary to grow and through this process she asks people 'What stories are you telling yourself?" and how not to get lost in their stories which ultimately can become a big part of their identity and how to get out of this space; feel more peace and accept where you are. Loving yourself is part of your story and Evanye helps you to learn where to look to find this! Show Notes: www.theselflovecenter.com (free class starting May 6 2018!)

Sheilagh O'Sullivan is a Lost and Found Specialist. She works with those aged 14 years + from all walks of life helping them to find fulfilling, meaningful and emotionally uplifting lives. Her areas of focus are loss, grief and bereavement as well as compassion fatigue, vicarious trauma and burnout and adoption. In today's podcast Sheilagh will define grief and mourning, dual process and provide a resource based on an image that can be helpful to contextualize grief. Show Notes: O’Sullivan Psychotherapy osullivanpsychotherapy.com Dennis the Menace dennisthemenace.com Patrick Bazinet patrickbazinet.com

This is episode two of a series with my colleague Sarah Terwilligar, we discuss aspects of our new virtual eating disorder caregiver coaching group program. In this episode Sarah is sharing the spectrum/continuum of disordered eating where it starts and how it progresses. There is no one size fits all presentation with an eating disorder, it looks differently for everyone. Eating disorder sub-types are introduced and explained and how thinking ‘this is just a phase’ is unhealthy and why. We spoke about how one does not need to have a formal diagnosis and how a negative body image could exist without disordered eating. Asking, are these issues disrupting your life? Are you pre-occupied with your size and shape? This is two of a series of episodes on the topic of eating disorders and disordered eating, stay tuned for more!

Together with my colleague Sarah Terwilligar we discuss aspects of our new virtual eating disorder caregiver coaching group program which in this episode includes a discussion about social media and the comparative nature of this medium; how this can impact language we use specific to dieting/calories/body image/self-esteem. We also discuss a spectrum of where one may land in terms of disordered eating or eating disorders and the importance of accepting your own body rather than living up to social media perception. This is one of a series of episodes on the topic of eating disorders and disordered eating so stay tuned! Please note, any and all information provided by this podcast should not be used as a substitute to seeking professional guidance that may be relevant to your own personal situation. This podcast is not intended to be a substitute for mental health therapy. Show Notes

In this episode I dedicate the full episode to reviewing a wonderful, easy read document – one where you don’t have to be a clinician or therapist to understand! The title is “Developmental Trauma Close Up”. This article was writer by Dr Shoshanah Lyons, Dr Kathryn Whyte, Ruth Stephens and Helen Townsend. The authors state that above all this is an article of hope. I wanted to share that hope to you, the listeners that may be struggling either as a parent or a caregiver of a child or youth or as an adult who finds themselves struggling with day-to-day life and how, when viewed in the context of trauma-informed care your perspective may change. Please note, any and all information provided by this article should not be used as a substitute to seeking professional guidance that may be relevant to your own personal situation. This podcast is not intended to be a substitute for mental health therapy. See related video.

Through social media I saw an ad recently indicating something that caught my eye; childhood trauma and Dr. Bruce Perry – on the U.S. show 60 Minutes with Oprah. As a psychotherapist and child and youth care practitioner this is my work! This national attention for something I am so passionate about literally made me giddy. Not of course for the trauma part but the fact this very important topic was being presented not to an audience of trauma therapists but everyday people like you.Trauma and understanding trauma is something that is relevant to every single person. It is not simply reserved for the catastrophic losses or tragic circumstances. Other links: Victim Services Dr. Gordon Neufeld Empathy Blog post on similar topic