Over It And On With It

Do you exhibit a type of behavior or personality trait you don’t necessarily love about yourself? It could be moodiness or it could be being extremely judgemental or it could be an emotional state you have a tendency to default to like sadness, worry, anger or fear. Women often have a difficult time dealing with anger because we have not been encouraged to express it. We may default to sadness which limits us from reaching our passion and our fire. We suppress our emotions and any big emotion we suppress will eventually leak. Anger becomes irritability, sadness becomes depression and shame comes out as insecurity. Suppressed emotions can also lead to physical ailments. It is not healthy to suppress our emotions. Today’s caller Monica acknowledges her own moodiness and is wondering if it is something she can change or if it’s a fixed personality trait. She suppresses her anger and doesn’t speak her truth. If there is something about you that does not feel good to you, like moodiness, you can change it. You jus

Dream University’s CEO, Marcia Wieder is a long established thought leader on visionary thinking and as Founder of The Meaning Institute, she teaches people to create and live fulfilling lives.  Listen in as she coaches you through the “CBA’s” of going after your dreams and making them happen!

We all, especially women, have struggled with body image, at least one time in our lives. The media and society at large do not make having a healthy body image easy. I want to highlight the fact that if we took all the mental energy people spend on thinking about, obsessing over and criticizing their bodies, and shifted it into thinking about how we could serve the world, change the world and solve big problems, imagine how different the world would be. If you are expending a lot of your own mental energy focusing on how you look rather than on how you feel and what you want to contribute, consider re-directing it.  In my 20’s I was never diagnosed with anorexia or bulimia but I definitely would say I had body image issues. I possibly had body dysmorphia, which is when your obsession with how you look and what you eat gets in the way of your happiness and your ability to connect. I don’t think I saw myself accurately. I was working as a personal trainer and nutritionist, so I was super obsessed about what I

Sometimes the experience of loneliness can feel so painful that connection seems almost impossible.  If that feels true for you, here is a four-step process you can use to support yourself in relieving feeling lonely.

There is a difference between being alone and feeling the pain of loneliness. We do not have to suffer from the pain of loneliness if we are enjoying a connected relationship with our self and a higher power. We are never really alone, and the illusion of the separation of God, higher power source or universe, is one of the core misunderstandings we are all here to overcome. If we tell ourselves things like “I’m alone, I hate being by myself, something must be wrong with me, I really need to be with other people”, then, of course we feel the pain of loneliness. It’s very human to want to be connected and to make sure we are getting our soul food by spending time with people we love. Feeling isolated or disconnected is incredibly hard. But sometimes it is the pain of loneliness that inspires us to do the work to nurture a better relationship with our self, or to create or deepen a spiritual connection.    This is exactly what is on the soul agenda for today’s caller, Christina. Her question initially is about

Wouldn’t you love to bring in more of what you want in your life without working so hard at it? If the answer is yes, then I think you will really love the practice I have for you today that is one of the biggest secrets to my success. In this episode of coaches corner I share a practice that has led to the manifestation of few of the things that have been integral to the growth of my business.

Our dreams come from our inner wisdom and our wants come from our ego. We all have things that happen in our lives, which create fear, uncertainty, doubt and self-limiting beliefs. Often, we try to ease the pain of those things by chasing after something. For example, if you are really hard on yourself, then you may spend a lot of time wanting someone else to love you. You have a high want for a romantic relationship or you have a parent who was really hard on you or only validated you for your accomplishments, and you may have grown up with the feeling of unworthiness and high want for money and success. Ego-based wants come from feeling ‘less than’, and then searching for something or someone to fill the void. These kinds of wants are not coming from an authentic place, because at the authentic self-level we know that absolutely nothing is missing. The want is coming from our ego. When we obtain our ego-based wants, they only give us a temporary sense of satisfaction. They do not cure the deep longing we fe

This Coach’s Corner features inspirational catalyst John O’Leary.  As a nine-year-old boy, John was burned on 100% of his body and expected to die. Today, he travels the world teaching others how to truly live. John empowers 50,000 people each year to LIVE INSPIRED at live events. He released his first book earlier this month and it is a bestseller on Amazon. After hearing him today in our coaches corner, you’ll definitely want a copy so remember the title: ON FIRE: The 7 Choices to Ignite a Radically Inspired Life. John is a business owner, writer, husband and father of four. Expected to die. Now, teaching others how to truly live. John O’Leary, welcome to Over it and On with It!.

Have you ever had something come back around like a romantic relationship, friendship, job or career path that you thought was over? Or perhaps you’ve gotten a second chance with a different situation or cast of characters.  Like a new relationship after a divorce or a job after being laid off. Or even your health after getting to the other side of an illness. Second chances do happen for all of us and when they do, it is important that we apply the lessons we learned the first time around. Many of us are great about doing this because we are intentional about not wanting to repeat the same kind of what we’d call mistakes again.  We approach second chances with gratitude and excitement. But second chances can also produce fear.  What is fascinating (and rather sad) about us humans sometimes is that the closer what we truly wants gets, the more we attempt to push it away.  Obviously this is not a conscious thing we do, the saboteur is very sneaky…yet powerful. And the reason we sabotage is because we have not

Are you too nice? That may seem like a strange question because most of us would think that being nice is a wonderful way to be. But sometimes we are too nice. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for love, kindness and generosity. Yet I’ve noticed that although niceness is very p.c., it isn’t always authentic. In today’s coaches corner I discuss the danger of killing yourself with inauthentic kindness!

Why does our list of requirements for a lover, looks a lot like a job application? There are considerations for height, weight, and experience. Did we meet the person based on a reference from someone else? Do they fit into our mold of the “right one”? When we focus or obsess more on how the relationship is progressing than the quality of the experience, we miss out on why we are supposed to be in the relationship in the first place. What we are questioning is not actually a real dispute. We are creating doubts in order to use them as distractions so we do not have to address the real issue, which may be something from our past we need to let go of.   Today’s caller, Jennifer, wants to find a reason she should not be dating her younger boyfriend. She says he is supportive and loyal, which are both things she believes she wants from a relationship, but she can’t seem to make herself trust that his feelings are real. As we drill down to the actual issue, Jennifer realizes she may be the one who is holding the r

Where’s the line between preparation and obsession? Picture a time, maybe it is even now, when you have been preparing for something BIG like an interview, event, presentation, or the release of some creative endeavor. Now consider how much mental, physical, and emotional energy you put into it. Was it a lot -perhaps too much? Did you find yourself stressing out about it?  

You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not your fault. You did the best you could with the tools you had at the time. These are powerful statements. What if you were told these things when you were young? Would you still be searching for your soulmate to complete you? When we are born we are complete. We have a sense of unconditional love and acceptance. As we go through our human existence, we are influenced by others around us and we tend to believe what they tell us as truths. Since those people have been apart from source love for a longer time, they say things which may not be encouraging for us. We then experience the illusion of separation. We feel a longing for the love and acceptance of others to fill the void and heal our core wound.  If you have ever chased love, been deeply hurt by a breakup or felt addicted to another person, you are unconsciously longing to find your way back to source love. The hurt may be hard for your ego to accept but your soul needs internal love, not love from another person.

When it comes to making a choice, is better to listen to our head or our heart? I explore this question in today’s episode of Coach’s Corner

Being “busy” seems to be a way we identify ourselves.  We run ourselves ragged trying to meet the expectations of our bosses, our colleagues, and our families. We begin to put our needs aside in favor of what others want. To compensate for not practicing self-love, we wear our busyness as a badge of honor, which only seems to distract us from the lack of balance in our lives. We run the risk of having our children believe that stress equals success. The distracting device which is busyness cannot go on forever. We start to tear apart at the seams. Our inner self is crying out for attention and it becomes rebellious in order to get what it needs. While it looks for compensation, we are moving on to the next thing. Feeding this longing will serve us better than if we try to push right through. Fulfillment will not find us until we stop, refuel and rebalance as part of a daily practice. Until we stop doing and start being. Today’s caller, Gulsen, is a very logical and analytical person. She feels motivated only

The feeling of being in love is the best. Not to mention the blissful feeling of certainty when we feel like you’ve met “the one” (finally!). You start fantasizing about the future and are convinced that the other person is on the same page you are. And then it ends. And you are not only heartbroken, but shocked because it seemed so right and you don’t understand what went wrong. I know that is not comforting if you are in the pain of a break-up, but understanding why the one you thought was going to be forever ended may offer you some relief. This Coaches Corner will help!

If you have pattern of being in relationships or going after unavailable people (either emotionally unavailable or still in relationship with others), then this episode is a must listen!! You’ll also lean about what I call “Journey Mate” relationships.  When we are first starting a relationship we often try to be the person we think we need to be, rather than our most authentic selves. We believe we need to be a certain way in order to keep the other person attracted to us. What we think is love for the other person is actually a projection of the qualities within ourselves we would like to develop. When the relationship ends before we think it should, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time, the relationship served us in some way. The other person was a journey mate. Journey mate relationships are a projection of what we need to see in ourselves. If the relationship doesn’t end and we continue sourcing our love from the other person we end up codependent. If this happens we may never fully express oursel

I answer this question in this week’s Coaches Corner.  This is an incredibly important episode to listen to so you can figure step into the Truth of Who You REALLY are.

Criticism seems to have the stickiness factor of super glue and compliments seem to be coated in oil. We allow hurtful things to play over and over in our heads like a broken record, especially when the recording came from a parent or an authority figure.  We create patterns out of the programming we receive when we are very young. These patterns stay with us throughout our lives until we reprogram ourselves. We can default to these patterns when dealing with situations and we tend to sabotage ourselves with fear instead of motivating ourselves with affirmations. We treat ourselves as others have treated us, instead of how we want to be treated. If you have a vision to impact other people’s lives, make sure you have saved yourself and let down your own walls first. In order to be transparent, authentic and true, you should become your own best client. How you do anything is how you do everything.  Today’s conversation with Rich is a lesson in how not to be a victim. Rich has wanted to create a deep emotional

Breakup.  There is not much that feels worse than heartache from ending a romantic relationship.  Although it feels awful right now, trust that you will be okay.  In this Coaches Corner, I guide you through the five things you can do immediately to ease the pain of your breakup and get to your breakthrough a lot sooner.