Border Boss

This episode was heavy and I do mean heavy on geography and google maps chat so we brought in someone who used to be local to tell us what all these weird names and numbers actually mean. Certified heavy guitarist SHELBY LERMO helps us get to the bottom of a very early but not at all uncharacteristic record from the very earliest footsteps of underground power-pop sensation TONY MOLINA's path to great fortune. Come on, let's dig the speedy satanic skate-grind of DYSTROPHY together.

Today we examine the early work of some people who went on to become vegan straightedge lifers and, in one case, a minor mall metal celebrity. We also tackle death, brotherhood, and tool mastery. Now that we have cleared up those three topics, there's nothing left for anyone to worry about. Life can just be a warm bath with no pain or fear.

It's an internet comment section where people are arguing about how sarcasm works only it's real life so people are getting punched in the real face and I guess I pretty much just described how fights work except hear me out - while everyone is getting punched, they are preoccupied with internet comment sections. Join us for the irony ouroboros of Philadelphia's nattily dressed provocateurs I HATE YOU.

Today we make the devil's bargain of reviewing a band made up entirely of friends and acquaintances for the first time in First Seven Inch Club history. Hear us sever bonds in realtime and forge hard new grudges even in old age on our puff puff pass journey into the basement venue grow room of long dormant Albany marijuanauts PERMANENT TRIP.

This week we get covered in thick ropey white hot ranch dressing and talk about cinemaaaa before realizing that our Easter promise of a goofy christian metalcore band to DuNk oN is most likely not even remotely christian but they definitely mess with angels and explosions of heavenly guitar heroism. Join us as we battle to see who can doxx Rhode island's DAY AFTER harder.

This week we have an absolutely horrific liveblogged cat food tasting as well as some deeply upsetting Bosstones chat before publicly displaying for the third time how unqualified we are to speak about Japanese hardcore as we mash it up to the woodwind augmented mayhem of Tokyo's COLORED RICEMEN.

Today we finally get the fat skinny on whether Mike was ever actually a boy and also take multiple detours into joke music and horology before devouring the wholesome salad of New Jersey's TORCHBEARER... a band of dangerously modern vintage chronologically but very comfortably 90s vintage sonically.

We get DANGEROUSLY close to modern times with a record that would not even be old enough to get it's drivers license yet - New Jersey's forgotten-by-the-internet PELLINORE. They bring you apocalypse woodcuts, deep comp lit and more... not to mention zine chat, grohl chat, mucky chat... we're 40 today and we brought you EVERYTHING.

This week we unearth a truly scandalous amount of dark web PDFs, sketchy peoplefinder sites, and creepy transcripts to find every private detail of North Carolina posi-core enthusiasm machines REINFORCE and I think as of this posting we will probably become their #2 or 3 google result. Also brief Deadguy "body parts" 7" chat. Buy a shirt, scrubs! We're rich and want to stay that way.

Mike lays it all on the line with his feelings about online record collecting before we dig into the completely assflap free anarcho punk stylings of listener suggested DEARBORN S.S. and I will now listen to input from current trainhopper punks about whether you guys still even know what assflaps are.

This week we talk about cat sandwiches and probe the many (not many) layers of Isla Vista's spear at the heart of emo and phone dialers, OCHRE. Mike also makes the most surprising advertisement which is roughly half the episode and I mean we're all about to be rich so you're gonna be glad about that.

This is it... we finally come to loggerheads about a record. Mike and Scot both see this record for what it is but somehow take away different lessons. We might actually have to pick a spot between Illinois and New York to finally have a fist fight after like 20 years of very neutral friendship. Way to go, 24th Solution. We had a good thing going and you screwed it up.

This week we are joined by a very special guest JONAH BAYER here to discuss the record Jonah by the band Jonah who have nothing to do with him. This episode is strictly by the book, no food chat, no toy chat, no old men kvetching about taxes and interest rates... just ice cold HARDCORE chat.

This week we follow a lead from End On End Podcast's Jeff and tear into the cold 90's thorax of Long Island's simultaneously beloved and forgotten Farkcus Affair. Does spelling have an effect on Longevity? Do all drummers have deep resumes? Would Ashes be better with shouting? Plus we open with some much needed Toy chat only 2 months late for christmas when toy chat would have made some sense.

Mike screws up Scot's birthday.

We are joined by our first very special guest GREY from the Demolisten Podcast as we cut the baloney and get immediately down to the business of being very strong and tough and moshing as hard as possible with what may or may not be Chicago's best-ever tough guy hardcore record from the Harms Way / Weekend Nachos / Fallout Boy Security side project CONVICTED.

We find a record that has full sound, all the minutes, 8 thicc traccs... so instead of conserving time and getting to the point, we mess around in gas stations and ancient photography instagrams before finally talking about the quietly legendary cleveland straightedge one-and-done stylings of GRUDGE MATCH.

This week it's time to surprise Mike with a wrestling / hardcore factoid before diving into the dark allegedly black metal (it's not) or maybe death metal (it's not) hardcore squall of Toronto's legendary (in a way) LEGION aka LEGION 666 aka LEGION DCLXVI who are not afraid to repeatedly be very rude about the bastard son of the lord.

Today's episode is a bit touch and go as we tiptoe around a possibly controversial individual's contribution to violent screechy hardcore - Hamilton, Ontario's very brief blasters EATING GLASS featuring a number of upside down crosses. Also a brief return to Border Boss content as we inhale the deep salinity of Taco Bell's temporary chicken wings.

Today we leverage all the power two aging goblins can muster to pass final judgement on the work of some sweet teens from 1991 just havin' fun in Virginia Beach... the primordial crossover sounds and otherworldly logo of AS IT STANDS plus continuous Cannibal Corpse chat and if you are at all alarmed to see this title in your feed, it's because we finally changed the name and logo from Border Boss, but don't worry we still have bad diets.