Dire Weasels: A Real(ish) Play 5e Dungeons And Dragons Podcast

The boat fight continues. Tetsu gets into an abusive relationship with his hat. We're sad when more specters appear. We receive a surprisingly relevant email from Reggie Realname.   @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @ArcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @MollieMM8 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him, for one last time! We love you Marc!

This may be a boring episode to listen to, depends on the type of person you are. Cody was busy battling some gnomes or something and couldn’t record with us so we found this easy to pick up and play RPG. We’re basically just talking about the game and creating our characters in this one. We hope it’s not too terrible for your ears.

We definitely didn't rip this title off from a different podcast just to put a spin on it. That's not something we would ever consider doing of course. So someone was missing but we like hearing ourselves talk and this epiosde was aggresively born. I can't promise you'll love it but I can promise it'll make you wonder what brought to listen to this in the first place.   Things mentioned in this episode: Taylor Swift: look what you made me do. Hollywood Undead: Everywhere I go. Katy Perry: Swish Swish. Fatboy Slim: Weapon of Choice. Pod Save America. R/Neutral Politics.

SO we're all out on this boat, STILL. Tetsu gets hurt then apologized to AND HE STILL PICKS A FIGHT. So here we are in a fight again, be cause of Tetsu, AGAIN. Crystal Light is the pinnacle of Role playing and does nothing wrong, EVER. Also, Ivana's internet sucks. It's definitely not her this time, definitely not.   @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

Okay, so we're officially on a boat. Ivana makes friends. Forrest figures out his life. John & Mollie do things... I think? Cody decides to be creepy.   @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

Cody is still making us fight things. He's taking this pretty seriously. What the hell kind of DM is he?! Oh and Ivana STILL doesn't know how to play D & D.    @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

I bet you’re wondering why this episode is being posted later in day.... IT’S BECAUSE I ACTUALLY LISTENED TO IT! I didn’t fail you guys this week. Well I kind of did because I’m terrible at D & D even after playing it for 3 years straight.   Any way.... Ivana teaches the word of the Lefthander, quite literally. Forrest doesn’t remember shit (neither does Ivana), John pulls a John and just gets us into stupid combat and Mollie is too pure for this podcast. Cody somehow avoids a heart attack.   @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

Hey guys, Zuko here.   Just kidding, it’s me. Your favorite weasel. Yeah, I know it’s me. I didn’t listen to this episode so I don’t know what happens BUT I’m listening to the next episode as I type this so the next episode will have a better description that may or may not spoil this episode. I won’t know if it spoils it because, again, I know fuck all of what happens in this episode.     @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

We're no strangers to loveYou know the rules and so do IA full commitment's what I'm thinking ofYou wouldn't get this from any other guy I just want to tell you how I'm feelingGotta make you understand Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you downNever gonna run around and desert youNever gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbyeNever gonna tell a lie and hurt you       @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.@0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.

We all got together to record. I don't think any of us were late for once so then shit hit the fan. Everything went wrong and we lost Forrest and at the end of it we all just had to laugh about it. We recorded something... Basically we just talked. Check it out if you have nothing better to do.

It has been like DECADES since we recorded. We're a little rusty. Tetsu does some shit, Crystal Light kind of pays attention and the gang attempts to do a whatsmacalls it. Skill assesment or whatever. That actually happened first. I don't know, just listen to the episode. If you want. You don't have to. You're free to do whatever you'd like actually, except certain things. But that's really not us controlling you. That's the government. Don't blame us, we just drink and roll dice.     @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys. @0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.    Tell us how much you love us: direweasels@gmail.com and stop being stingy with your stars and load us up with 5 on iTunes.     P.S. We are a part of The Glorious House of S. Go remind them how much yo

Hey guys, guess we're back on our bullshit! After all that has happened, the people we've met, people we've killed, it's finally time to get down to this quest! Why are people dissappearing from Palllet Town and nearby hamlets to the north? What else is going on up there? And what was with that side quest? Best keep listening...Thank you for downloading the Dire Weasels! You can find us on twitter collective @DireWeasels, find our DM Cody @codedude3, Forrest Walker is @walk6070, Ivana Greenleaf is @arcanevice, John is @absurdistkobold, and Mollie is @eskimomo9. If you like what you heard after downloading, head on over to iTunes or your respective podcasting app and give us a rating and review! If you do, send us an email at direweasels@gmail.com and let us know where to find it so we can read it out on the show! Or if you just want to email us some questions, that would be cool too! If you want to support us monetarily, check us out on Patreon at patreon.com/direweasels! We have tiers where you can affect th

Last and final episode of our little side quest adventure! Things get a bit creepy. We figure out what has happened to this small little town... maybe? Thank you for downloading the Dire Weasels! You can find us on twitter collective @DireWeasels, find our DM Cody @codedude3, Forrest Walker is @walk6070, Ivana Greenleaf is @arcanevice, John is @absurdistkobold, and Mollie is @eskimomo9. If you like what you heard after downloading, head on over to iTunes or your respective podcasting app and give us a rating and review! If you do, send us an email at direweasels@gmail.com and let us know where to find it so we can read it out on the show! Or if you just want to email us some questions, that would be cool too! If you want to support us monetarily, check us out on Patreon at patreon.com/direweasels! We have tiers where you can affect the world, get some snail mail from us, or just get some bonus content! You can also find our amazing editor, Marc @0dius, that's with a zero not an O. We are also part of the S. H

Making my way downtown.    Walking fast. Faces passed. The adventure continues! (or ends. I'm not sure. I didn't edit this.)  Don't worry. Forrest will be back next episode...... I think?  Tweet at us. Email us. Support us on Patreon. Curse us into the next century. Whatever tickles your fancy.

I bet you were hoping we'd continue our actual campaign.... SUCKS FOR YOU, WE'RE STILL SIDE QUESTIN' BITCHES! At this rate we'll be totally lost when we do actually return to our campaign and you'll be yelling at us because we screw everything up. Which at this point is your fault. YOU KNEW WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR.     K. Bai.   P.S. Blame Forrest.

This is just a sid thing. Not part of anything. We talk, A LOT. You've been warned. Listen at your own risk.

SIIIDIEEEE QUUESTTTTT!!!   Forrest is livin' it up in Spain, so here we are. HAVING FUN WITHOUT HIM! Suckerrrr.   Any way. We do things. Ivana has a racist accent. Everyone else lets her so they're accomplices.      @CodeDude3 just makes shit up as he goes along. @Eskimomo9 drinks her woes away. @AbsurdistKolbold secretly rocks out to Journey. @arcaneVice isn't paying attention whatsoever.    @0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.    Tell us how much you love us: direweasels@gmail.com and stop being stingy with your stars and load us up with 5 on iTunes.     P.S. We are a part of The Glorious House of S. Go remind them how much you love your hairy weasels @ShouseStudio

We're still stuck with our super speacial guest star unfortunately amd trying to get through Cody's devious plan. Oh joy..... @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice gets drunk. @AbsurdistKobold has fabulous hair. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys. @0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.    Tell us how much you love us: direweasels@gmail.com and stop being stingy with your stars and load us up with 5 on iTunes.     P.S. We are a part of The Glorious House of S. Go remind them how much you love your hairy weasels @ShouseStudio

Seriously, thanks for listening y'all! @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice yells nonsense. @AbsurdistKobold disapproves of such things. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.   @0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.    Tell us how much you love us: direweasels@gmail.com and stop being stingy with your stars and load us up with 5 on iTunes.     P.S. We are a part of The Glorious House of S. Go remind them how much you love your hairy weasels @ShouseStudio

So these chucklefucks just hop onto a boat, all willy nilly, with some stranger! Then little Oompa Loompa dudes are a thing in this world. THEN weird stuff happens. What stuff you ask? WELL LISTEN TO THE EPISODE AND YOU'LL FIND OUT!       @CodeDude3 is our mighty glorious leader guiding us into battle. @arcaneVice yells nonsense. @AbsurdistKobold disapproves of such things. @Eskimomo9 silently regrets every decision that has lead her to this podcast. @Walk6070 jerks it to the sound of typing and howler monkeys.   @0dius does the best he can with the ridiculous shit we give him.    Tell us how much you love us: direweasels@gmail.com and stop being stingy with your stars and load us up with 5 on iTunes.     P.S. We are a part of The Glorious House of S. Go remind them how much you love your hairy weasels @ShouseStudio