Fmklit Pod

Hail, good sir knight! By my troth, thou hast set my nethers aquiver most handily! Let us partake in the horizontal joust! This is a quote from our favorite Shakespeare sonnet, which is all too fitting because today we're doing Ren Faire! So grab your doublets and lead-based makeup and join us as we read "Well Met" by Jen DeLuca, and "Knight of Pleasure (Smuggler's Cove)" by Simone Anderson. Today our humanist hosts discuss guys in eyeliner, how to spot a sex cult, and the kinkiest new sex position - missionary! Here's the link to the Newsweek article about the ancient tree in New Zealand: https://www.newsweek.com/ancient-tree-discovered-earths-magnetic-field-1447570 And support us on Patreon! pateron.com/fmklitpod

It gets lonely out here on the ranch, so we're ready to rustle up some love! That's why today we're doing cowpeople!...Cowfolk?...Cowpersons? Cowpokes! For this heart-wrangling episode, we read "Crazy for the Cowboy" by Cindy Spencer Pape and "Braggin Rights" by Kenna White. Our rugged hosts discuss the discombobulating power of hats, the ins and outs of easements, and we have such a long intro!! Sorry! (Unless you like it, then you're welcome). Support us on Patreon! patreon.com/fmklitpod

Nothing's sexier than a little danger. Except maybe danger coupled with some fantastic organizational skills, which is why today we're doing Mobsters! For this criminally sexy episode, we read "Bedding the Enemy" by LaQuette and "Steel Hearts (Brothers in Blue Book 1)" by Jason Collins. Our felonious hosts discuss the most complicated route to get in someone's pants, that there needs to be more face sitting, and that Claire knows an awful lot about the mafia... Support us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/fmklitpod

You, dear listeners, are royalty to us and should be wooed accordingly. Which is why today we're doing princes! Specifically, modern princes with commoners (we love a specific theme). For this episode we read "His Most Convenient Bride (Princely Passions)" by Holly Rayner and "The Royal Report" by Claire Castle. Our imperial hosts discuss baking hours, the fact that there actually *is* such a thing as too many sandwiches, and Neil goes on another grammar rant. She's a grammar queen, apparently. Support us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/fmklitpod

What's better than finding the love of your life? Finding both the loves of your life! Which is why today we're doing polyamory! For this extra love-filled episode, we read "Heart and Hand: Interracial Mail Order Bride (Gold Sky Book 1)" by Rebel Carter, and "She Whom I Love (Treading the Boards Book 2)" by Tess Bowery. Our hosts discuss arguments about wet clothes, what it means to be the Meg of the relationship, and how easily bananas can break the fantasy of the narrative. And don't forget to check out our Patreon! patreon.com/fmklitpod

We here at FMKlit think that a good book is worth more than its weight in gold. And while we don't always read good books, this episode's books have plenty of gold because today we're doing Treasure Hunters! For this expedition of an episode, we read "Unexpected Treasure: The Treasure Hunters Series Book I" by Aidan Willows and Grace Risata, and "Treasure of Love (Love Series Book 2)" by Scotty Cade. Today our hosts discuss alien dicks; the do's and don'ts of underwear shopping; and the most important quality a person can possibly have: a competent pussy.

Pour yourself some fine brandy, climb into those silky sheets, and crank up the gramophone, because today, our most esteemed listeners, we're doing classics! For this very fancy episode, we read "Persuasion" by Jane Austen, and "Maurice" by E. M. Forster. Our learned hosts discuss some of the most esoteric of subjects: where one can find the reset button on the human body, a strong contender for the "Worst Ex in Literature" Award, and whatever the fuck a pump room is. And, of course...the Goop Diaper: https://goop.com/wellness/environmental-health-civics/diaper-tax/ Support us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/fmklitpod

They say love is the strongest force in the universe and, in the interest of science, we here at FMKlit are going to test this theory. Because today we're doing human/alien lovin'!! Today we read "Ruth's Bonded (The Gandry Book 1)" by V.C. Lancaster and "Planet Glecerus [Alien Lovers 1] (Siren Publishing Menage Everlasting ManLove)" by Olivia Black. On this intergalactic episode, our hosts discuss the caloric risk of too much sex, the dangers of hide and seek, and Claire wants it known that she is not here for necklace. And, as promised, romance Twitter drama!! https://twitter.com/BookishAlerts/status/1516521583174635520?s=20&t=NHMwpNKeQWlvCUDSeFSbug

Is that a 2x4 in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me? Hope you're ready for a good lay....ing of bricks. Because today we're doing construction workers! This time around we read "Hard Wood: A Steamy Romantic Comedy" by Tara Crescent and "One Brick at a Time" by J. P. Bowie. For this hard tool-filled episode, our hosts discuss the joy of a good meet-cute, sex furniture, and the origin of witch hats. Check out our Patreon!! patreon.com/fmklitpod And check out "Friends with Food," the podcast where Claire and Neil were guests: https://www.friendswithfoodpod.com/

It is a truth universally acknowledged that millennials with too much time on their hands must be in want of starting a podcast. This direct quote is very wise, and that's why today we're doing modern retellings of Jane Austen! Today we read "The Code for Love and Heartbreak" by Jillian Cantor (Emma) and "Most Ardently" by Susan Mesler-Evans (Pride & Prejudice). On this especially literary episode, our hosts discuss student debt, a startling artifact from Claire's past, and Neil comes up with the best worst business idea ever. As as promised, here's a cartoon explaining what it's like having allergies: https://imgur.com/K2i2QD7

Nothing quite speaks to the quiet intimacy of falling in love like doing it in front of cameras and millions of viewers. Which is why we're doing reality dating shows! Today we read "One to Watch" by Kate Stayman-London and "The Charm Offensive" by Alison Cochrun. For this heavily produced and subtly scripted episode, our hosts discuss the marriageability of pastries, how NOT to dismantle a system, and that Claire would be the most evil reality show producer ever.

We here at FMK love a boss ass lady. And today we're taking that very literally because this episode is all about ladies inheriting a business! For this fiscally sound episode, we read "Twisted Creek" by Jodi Thomas and "Satisfaction Guaranteed" by Karelia Stetz-Waters. Our boss bitch hosts discuss some fantastic cartoony villains, the many nuances of sex toys, and when the romance actually detracts from the romance novel. Also, here's the very special anti-meth commercial that was a part of Neil's childhood: https://youtu.be/u1VwLsrzbyg

Bigfoots? Bigfeet? However you say it, we're gonna get us some elusive lovers today! And to do that, we read "Bigfoot and the Librarian" by Linda Winstead Jones and "Going Sasquatch (Finnegan & Morrow Book 1)" by Jess Whitecroft. In this episode, our hairy hosts discuss retractable bigfoot penises, the dangers of a 12th birthday party, and that himbos who are nice deserve love too. Also, for the record, Claire said "baking."

Interior; Podcast studio; day. Two tipsy hosts are yammering on about something. Cross-fade to...ROMANCE! We hope you like movie magic, dear listeners, because today we're doing Screenwriters! For this episode we read "It's Complex" by Shoma Narayanan and "This is Kind of an Epic Love Story" by Kacen Callender. In this well-structured episode, our hosts discuss when the back of a book lies to us, when teens make terrible decisions, and to always check your smoke detectors. Happy 4 year anniversary, listeners!!

We're back, dear listeners, with a full episode! But this one is going to be a little different. You may remember in ep. 49 "Hate to Love" that we read a little book called "The Hating Game: A Novel" by Sally Thorn. And we....had things to say about it. One of those things was that it was being made into a movie. So we watched it! Even Christine got in on the fun and we discuss the movie vs. the book. Did our feelings change? Is it a good adaptation? And is there justice for Jeanette?

Hello all you wonderful people! Oh we've missed you so!! This is just a grand announcement that we are back!! Not to mention some updates and what we've been up to and what you can expect in the next month. On 1/19 we will release a special episode, and starting in February we will be back to our regular format with the books "It's Complex" by Shoma Narayanan, and "This is Kind of an Epic Love Story" by Kacen Callender.

A brief announcement about our summer break! We'll be taking a break for the next couple months, at least. But never fear! We'll be sure to give you a heads up of when we're coming back.

Here at FMKlit, we have a philosophy that we hold very near and dear to our hearts: Sun's out, buns out! Summer's around the corner and we're ready to heat things up! Today, we read "A Small Slice of Summer (The Best of Betty Neels)" by Betty Neels and "The Summer of Jordi Perez (And the Best Burger in Los Angeles)" by Amy Spalding. For this sun-soaked episode, our hosts discuss the mood killer that is talking driving directions, dude bros with hearts of gold, and the dangerous allure of Dutchmen.

How do you like your love? Dirty? With a twist? On the rocks? However you like your love, make it a double! You deserve it. And while you do, we're going to do bartenders! Today we read "Breaking the Bachelor (Smart Cupid Book 1)" by Maggie Kelley, and "Pretty Perfect (Boys in Makeup Book 1)" by Christina Lee and Riley Hart. For this happy hour (and change), our hosts discuss bars that have too many themes, backstories that leave more questions than answers, and we have the longest Hot and Bothered ever. Ever.

Some things are just better in groups: board games, splitting a check, love. And knitting! So put some love into every stitch because today we're doing knitting! For this cozy episode, we read "Neanderthal Seeks Human: A Smart Romance (Knitting in the City Book 1)" by Penny Reid and "Knit, Purl, a Baby and a Girl: An LGBTQ Romance" by Hettie Bell. Today our hosts discuss the subtle differences between Wendells and slamps; why you need to accept someone's boundaries when you agree to them; and have FMK-style story hour where Claire reacts to the end of a book in real time because she didn't finish the book.