Fmklit Pod

Not all fairy tails have happy endings. But they sure are sexy! Which works out great for us, because today we're doing Fairies! This time we read "The Cruel Prince (The Folk of the Air Book 1)" by Holly Black and "Poison Kiss (Earthside Book 1)" by Ana Mardoll. On this puckish episode, there is finally court intrigue we all deserve, our hosts give lots of keeeeesses, and we have an amazing Christine-related surprise!

Hike up your tartans and get ready to toss some cabers because today we're doing Highlanders! On this well braw episode, we read "The Wedding (Laird's Fiancees Book 2)" by Julie Garwood, and ~listened to~ (gasp!) "The Low Road" by James Lear, narrated by Mark Bachman. In this episode, our hosts discuss hot priests, the very worst thing you can do with British food, and Neil and Claire learn that they can, indeed, be exposed to too much sex.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then we're gonna make you rich in sexy, sexy words. Because today we're doing graphic novels! This time we read "Moonstruck, Vol. 1" by Grace Ellis, et al., and "Sleepless, Vol. 1" by Sarah Vaughn, et al. In this visually stimulating episode, our hosts talk about cuddly werewolves, romantic knights, and the very complex and confusing feelings they had about Disney's Robin Hood.

Are things heating up in here, or is it just the weather! Grab your shades because on today's episode of Cuddle, Marry, Kill Lit, we're talking about summer romance! We read "Let's Talk About Love" by Claire Kann, and "Sixteenth Summer" by Michelle Dalton. On this scorching episode, our hosts talk about the trails and tribulations of college living arrangements, what happens when your summer is a little ~too~ perfect, and why sometimes it's just better to cuddle.

I sure love my anatomy class, and I'm more than willing to do extra credit! Because today we're doing professors! This time we read "Seducing Professor Coyle" by Darien Cox, and "Dear Obsessed: A Dark Romance Thriller (Dirty Letters Book 1)" by Dori Lavelle. In this episode, our studious hosts talk about competent women in authority, write fanfiction for one of the books, and Neil is FINALLY in one of the books!!

You may not see it, but I'm winking at you with my third eye. All signs point to sexiness in this episode because today we're doing psychics! In this revealing episode, we read "Not in the Cards (An Oracle Bay Novel Book 1)" by Amy Cissell and "Soulmates Inc." by Bill Eisele. This time our hosts discuss punny shop names, how sexy books can really be, and an FMKlit first! People have adult conversations about their relationship!!

Is that an alimony check in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me? It's time to throw away that wedding ring and get crazy, because today we're doing divorcés!! This time we read "Crashing Into Tess (McGreers Book #1)" by Lilly Christine and "Only See You (Only Colorado Book 2)" by JD Chambers. In this contentious episode, our hosts discuss the dangers of stew hair, why it's always important to remember that you're in cellphone times, and Christine reveals one of her deepest, darkest secrets!

We here at FMKlit like our lovers to be hard, eye-catching, thought-provoking, well-organized, on sale, shelved properly.....wait, maybe we're just talking about books. Same thing, really. Today we're doing a theme very near and dear to our hearts: Bookshops! In this page turning episode (imagine there are pages), we read "A Note in the Margin" by Isabelle Rowan, and "Bookends: A Novel" by Jane Green. This time our hosts talk about how important it is to say someone's name as many times as possible, the dangers of having an au pair, and Neil puts another greedy top on blast.

Hello, children of the night. It's time to get your blood going. Your tasty, tasty blood. Because today, we're doing vampires! This time we read "Hemovore" by Jordan Castillo Price, and "Dead Until Dark (Sookie Stackhouse/True Blood, Book 1)" by Charlaine Harris. On today's fang-licking good episode, we talk about what happened in the old country, what REALLY happened to Elvis, and Neil's Dracula fantasies. Suhkeh!!!

We've had a security breach! It's time to go into lockdown. In my pants!! Get out your reflective shades, kids, because today we're seducing the Secret Service! We read "Under His Protection (Protect and Defend Book 1)" by Karen Erickson, and "Valor on the Move: May-December Gay Romance" by Keira Andrews. In this super secret, super secure episode, our protector podcasters talk about the dangers of wearing a bikini in public, how romantic tunnels can be, and we *actually* have a conversation about getting tested!

Look for a man in a trench coat and a fedora. He'll show you his....assets. The fate of the nation depends on it! Happy one year anniversary, listeners! Since the traditional one year anniversary present is paper, we got you books! "An Extraordinary Union (Loyal League Book 1)" by Alyssa Cole, and "Skin in the Game" by Melissa Price. And they're spy books! We FINALLY get spies! This time our hosts talk about how arousing it is to get woke, why not to have too many nicknames for your boo, and take a look at the year as well as look ahead to what this year might have in store. (P.S. The codeword is "boobs")

Let's go get some tail and get wet! Because today we're doing mermaids! (Merfolk? Merpersons?). Today we read "The Mermaid’s Escape: Mythology Romance (The Siren Series Book 1)" by Kellie McAllen and "Stealing the Wind (Mermen of Ea Trilogy Book 1)" by Shira Anthony. This time our hosts discuss the perils of buying your lover milk, special princess bras, and spend waaaaaay to much time talking about merparts. Like, where do the genitals go on a fish-person?!

We survived National Novel Writing Month! And we brought back Meg Trowbirdge (@thesinginwriter) to see how it went! We talk about how the month went for us, what writing for a whole month was like, and what we plan to do with our work in the future. We even each read a passage from what we wrote this month! So if you think it's terrible, you can sit there smugly and think: "Well these bitches have no room to talk about other peoples' books." But don't bother tweeting that or anything. We'll ignore it. If you want to participate in NaNoWriMo next year, get ready now and go to NaNoWriMo.org! Find Meg on her wonderful podcast Vicious Cycle. Listen to Vicious Cycle here: https://soundcloud.com/user-461040979 Follow Vicious Cycle on Instagram here: @viciouscyclepodcast Call them with your questions here: 910-6-UTERUS / 910-688-3767

Grab your gorgeous gowns and foppish finery because we're going back. IN TIME!! This episode we read "Once Upon a Time Travel" by Sariah Wilson and "The Spanish Pearl" by Catherine Friend. This *time* (get it), our hosts talk about superfluous witches, superfluous animal friends, and Claire has a rant about superfluous x's.

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....that guy I slept with last night. Get on your spandex and capes, because today we're doing superheros!! This time we read: "The Missing Duke (Heart of a Hero Book 9)" by Heather King, and "Love for the Cold-Blooded: Or: The Part-Time Evil Minion’s Guide to Accidentally Dating a Superhero" by Alex Gabriel. In this action-packed episode, our heroic hosts discuss misleading plots, slutty sidekicks, and Claire almost has the "drawing the bath" rant again. Also, Neil is promised spies, only to have them taken away. AGAIN.

November is National Novel Writing Month, and Neil and Claire are going to put their money where their mouths are! They're going to try and write novels this month! Plus! Our first interview!! So many exclamation points!!!!!! We interview our dear friend Meg Trowbirdge (@thesinginwriter), friend of the show, writer, theatre artist, and co-host of the amazing podcast Vicious Cycle (twitter). Meg is participating in NaNoWriMo with us, so hopefully we all have books by the end of November. And you can participate, too! Just go to NaNoWriMo.org! Exclamation point! Listen to Vicious Cycle here: https://soundcloud.com/user-461040979 Follow Vicious Cycle on Instagram here: @viciouscyclepodcast Call them with your questions here: 910-6-UTERUS / 910-688-3767

Ready for something a little dark? A little dangerous? Anything you say, Master. Get out the riding crops and handcuffs because today we're doing BDSM! This time, we read "Story of O" by Pauline Réage (translation by Sabine d'Estrée), and "The Chateau" by Tiffany Reisz. Today, our hosts discuss pegging, the glamour of fashion photography, and Neil is promised spies and, once again, (spoiler!) is disappointed.

Do you let the dark, handsome stranger rock your world? If so, turn to page 69. Or do you let yourself be wooed by the sensitive poet? If so, turn to page 123. Get ready to make some tough choices, because today we're reading choose your own adventure romance novels! This time we read "Choose Your Own Romance: San Francisco" by Katherine Pierce Chinelli and "My Lady's Choosing: An Interactive Romance Novel" by Kitty Curran and Larissa Zageris. In this episode, our adventurous hosts talk about period sex, arson on orphanages, and Claire confesses one of her guiltiest of guilty pleasures.

We hope you've stretched, because we're back with another Quickie!! Little did we know that Amazon has a "One-Hour Short Reads" section, which is the perfect tag for a good Quickie! Which naughty novellas did we read this time? Well, you'll have to listen and find out!

Are you ready to play with some balls? Are you a tight end or a wide receiver? Well get your ass on the field, because today we're doing football players! This time we read "Colton (Wild Men Book 1)" by Melissa Belle, and "Illegal Contact (Barons Book 1)" by Santino Hassell. In this episode, our sensual sportscasters discuss the virtues of therapy, death by plot, and Neil and Claire have their dumbest fight yet. But these books have blowjobs and rimming, so they're both happy as can be!