Divorce Conversations For Women

False Sense Series False Sense of... Amicability It is far wiser to judge people by their deeds than their speech – judge their track record rather than their talk. -Rasheed Ogunlaru Do you find yourself believing what your spouse says rather than believing their actions?  This is what I call creating a false sense of amicability.  What is a false sense of amicability and how does it play out for some people in the divorce process?  It is where one person believes it is possible to avoid all conflict throughout the divorce process even though the previous track record proves otherwise. There is more emphasis on words than actions.  You want to believe that you can avoid conflict. You want your divorce to be amicable. I mean, who doesn’t, right? However, avoiding conflict may not be the answer. Avoidance is often fueled by fear of feeling uncomfortable, fear of being bullied or fear of being perceived as selfish or unreasonable. Let’s be honest, being passive is exhausting. You work tirelessly to please others

Did you know that according to a Forbes article nearly half of the women surveyed said they had “financial surprises” during the divorce? Say what?! Here is a short list of the things I have seen with my clients (changing life insurance beneficiaries, setting up separate business entities, establishing private bank accounts, transferring money to another family member, taking loans from 401ks and more!).  Furthermore, here are a few comments women may hear from their spouse in hopes to keep things “amicable”. You will be well taken care of.  You don’t need to have the business valued. It isn’t worth anything.  You can keep the house – and I will keep my pension. This is what I call creating a false sense of financial security.  Learn more over on our blog! Want more info on our Bridge Group Experience? click HERE.   Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for women and educating them on how financial st

Rhonda sits down with Trauma-Informed Coach and author, Houa Utech to discuss covert narcissism and what it’s like to move through the divorce process when you feel like you have no control. They discuss:   What can you do to build your team? Ways the court system is broken. How to end up with what you deserve. Tips to deal with the trauma you carry.   And be sure to check out Houa’s Book:  The Unseen Wounds of Women  About today’s guest:    Houa Utech is an International Trauma-Informed Coach, advocate, and author who specializes in helping women recover and reclaim their lives from Betrayal Trauma, Covert Narcissistic Abuse, Complex PTSD, Divorce, and Post-Separation Abuse.   Houa has personally experienced covert narcissistic abuse and trauma from infidelity and betrayal which led to her developing anxiety, panic attacks, and complex PTSD.    In her search to find understanding and healing, she discovered a whole community of women dealing with similar experiences of intimate partner abuse, po

Recently, Rhonda sat down with Divorce Mortgage Planner, Tami Wollensak, on her YouTube video series, Peaceful Divide.  We are pleased to be able to share that conversation with you here! Tami and Rhonda discuss strategy, finding the right team, and moving the needle to enable women to walk away empowered.    Have you ever wondered how Rhonda approaches her strategy? Listen in!     About our Guests today: Tami Wollensak is a Senior Mortgage Loan Originator and a Certified Divorce Lending Professional NMLS 1963450 at Oak Leaf Community Mortgage, A Division of Mutual Federal Bank. An Equal Housing Lender insured by FDIC.     Check out Tami’s Website! Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for women and educating them on how financial strategies can impact their personal and professional success. Her work has shown women going through a divorce how to have a voice, be assertive, get results, be driven, and move forwar

If you’re contemplating divorce, or in the middle of the process, you may not see what your life can look like moving forward. Our guest, Laura Ericson believes in new beginnings! Laura and Rhonda talk about how you can prioritize travel - even if it’s just a weekend away. Taking time for yourself can be an important part of the healing process.  About today’s guest:    Laura Ericson is a travel expert and guide - ready to help you plan your next trip.    Although Laura has always loved travel, it wasn’t until she got divorced in 2017 that her desire to see the world was truly ignited. She had wasted a decade of her life being unhappy, and decided then and there to make travel a priority. After spending 2020 cooped up and unable to travel, Laura realized how much she not only wanted but needed travel in her life. So she decided to do something about it.   Laura offers group travel to places all over the world! Be sure to check out her site for more information:   Website   Instagram   Travel Facebook Group

Are you contemplating divorce? Do you feel unsettled and can’t quite answer the question, “What do I really want?”    Today’s episode is a special one. Rhonda is joined by Certified Energy & Performance Coach, Nicole Isler as they honor and remember a mutual client who lived out her next best move to the fullest. You’ll be encouraged and inspired as you hear the story of how she worked through her emotions and found her true, authentic self.    Our hope is that as you listen, you’ll realize that you can be just as empowered to make your life what you want right now. About today’s guest:   Nicole Isler, “The Energy Coach” has been an ardent advocate for health and wellness for over 30 years. She helps high-achieving coaches and wellness professionals rekindle their passion to get back their energy so their life + business becomes enjoyable again and feels like the ultimate party.   Through Nicole’s proprietary methods and techniques, her clients master their emotional responses to stress, increase produc

“Don’t be afraid to be your own advocate.” Attorney Brian Blitz and Rhonda have an eye opening conversation about the divorce process, how it affects women, and ways to get the support you need. Spoiler: it takes a team; one that will provide the strategy you need to come out ahead.  About today’s guest:    Brian says:   You do better for people when you do better with people. That’s not only my approach to matrimonial law, it’s my approach to life. Working with clients through some of the most difficult periods of their lives, I approach my work as a Principal at the Berger Schatz law firm with a combination of optimism, empowerment, and lightheartedness because I’m out to change the image of a stereotypical divorce lawyer.   I am an experienced and highly respected family law attorney, often praised for my compassion and holistic approach to solving family law problems. I've represented professional athletes and other celebrities, business owners, C-suite executives, medical professionals, and their spous

Rhonda’s guest today is AJ Grossman, owner of Leap Frog Divorce.  AJ is a master at navigating tough conversations in divorce.   How do you respond? Is a response required? How to engage in a difficult conversation with a learning mindset.   Establishing good boundaries Neutralize the emotion Determine how to protect yourself if a civil conversation isn't possible.  Breathe! You’ll be ok   WEBSITE LinkedIN Facebook YouTube   About today’s guest:  A.J. Grossman graduated from San Jose State University with a degree in business administration and at the top of his Florida law school class. He immediately went on to achieve his Master of Laws degree in Dispute Resolution from The Straus Institute at Pepperdine University Law School in California, which is the #1 ranked Dispute Resolution program in the country. As the son of a Navy Officer and the founder of several businesses, he learned quickly about service to others. A.J.’s goal is to help people solve problems, plain and simple. Being in the right place

Rhonda’s guest today is Paulette Rigo from Better Divorce Academy. If you are contemplating divorce or in the midst of going through it, it’s important to stay educated! Finding the right experts to walk with you in the process is instrumental to the success of the outcome.   About today’s guest:   As a Credentialed Mediator, Certified Divorce Coach and Director of Divorce Coaching and Management for Divorce Operations for Divorce Right Inc. Paulette Rigo specializes in mediating and coaching clients through high conflict, domestic violence, parental alienation, estrangement and narcissistic divorce cases.   Better Divorce Academy educates and encourages those who are considering or in the midst of the divorce to process thrive in the midst of the heartache and challenges. Connect with Paulette:   Company Website   Facebook   LinkedIn   Twitter   Instagram   YouTube Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advoca

Britt Baker, Dow Janes co-founder and money mindset coach, sits down with Rhonda to delve into the mindset of money. Who do you want to be with your money?  How do you go about rewriting your story? If you’re feeling discouraged, you aren’t alone - and this episode will give you the tools you need to make some real changes.   Learn what a weekly money ritual is and how it’s actually self-care! Check out Britt’s free resource:    https://try.dowjanes.com/ritual/ About today’s guest:   Britt Williams Baker (she/her) is a Harvard Business School graduate, an expert investor with 10+ years of experience, and money mindset coach. She is on a mission to serve those who have traditionally been left out of the financial world, and she does so by bringing a step-by-step approach to   saving and investing. Through her company, Dow Janes, she and her co- founder Laurie-Anne have helped hundreds of women+ pay off debt fast, set up  long-lasting money systems, and invest for the first time. Britt believes everyone deser

Today’s episode tackles the difficult subject of Coercive Control and the various ways your spouse could be controlling you. Rhonda and Lisa discuss some trends and offer suggestions on how to set boundaries and fight back.  About today’s guest:    Lisa Fontes, PhD, is an internationally known expert on child abuse, intimate partner abuse, and sexual violence. As a researcher, activist, expert witness, and author, she works to protect the most vulnerable people from violence. She has written many journal articles and the books: Invisible Chains: Overcoming Coercive Control in Your Intimate Relationship, Interviewing Clients Across Cultures Child Abuse and Culture: Working with Diverse Families She is a Senior Lecturer II at the University of Massachusetts Amherst in the Department of Interdisciplinary Studies. She has worked as a family, individual, and group psychotherapist. She has conducted research in Santiago, Chile, and with diverse people in the United States.  Dr. Fontes is a popular conferenc

Have you ever felt like something is “off” in regard to your spouse and your finances? The warning sides of fraud could be right in front of you. Tracy and Rhonda discuss the red flags to look out for and how to trust your gut. Be sure to connect with Tracy and access her Divorce Money Guide!   About today’s guest:   Tracy Coenen is a Forensic Accountant  with Sequence Inc. Forensic Accounting   Tracy has been investigating fraud for more than 25 years, but she didn’t always want to be a forensic accountant. With a dream of one day being a prison warden, Tracy went to Marquette University in Milwaukee, WI to get a criminology degree. A class on financial crime investigations reminded her how much she loved Encyclopedia Brown books as a kid. She continued her criminology degree, but added accounting and economics courses so she could sit for the CPA exam… and here Tracy is, finding money in cases of corporate fraud, high net worth divorce, and other financial shenanigans.    She has created a new resource, The

Rhonda sits down with Philip Segal to discuss the role of an investigator as you go through the divorce process. Learn how to ask the right questions, surround yourself with the right people and uncover things that can help you at settlement time. You may know more than you think you know!   About today’s guest: Philip Segal is a Managing Member with Charles Griffin Intelligence.    Philip has been a lawyer and investigator since 2007. Prior to that, he was a journalist for 19 years in five countries with a specialization in finance. His most recent job was Finance Editor at the Asian Wall Street Journal in Hong Kong.    Find out more at Philip’s website: Charlesgriffinllc.com   Blog: The Divorce Asset Hunter    Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for women and educating them on how financial strategies can impact their personal and professional success. Her work has shown women going through a divorce ho

Rhonda sits down with Christian speaker and author, Laura Sandretti to discuss all the ways women stay stuck in guilt and shame by the way they talk to themselves. It is possible to reprogram your mind to break free from what is holding you back.  Pay attention to how you talk to yourself and work to change the conversation going on in your own head. Most importantly, give yourself grace.    About today’s guest:   Laura Sandretti has been a Christian speaker, blogger, and author for over ten years. She has her master's degree in Theological Studies and is a former high school teacher and women's ministry director.    Connect with Laura:   Website   Facebook   LinkedIn   Instagram   YouTube Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for women and educating them on how financial strategies can impact their personal and professional success. Her work has shown women going through a divorce how to have a voice, b

Are you re-entering the job market - or wanting to uplevel your current position? Rhonda and Career Coach Nikki Ryberg talk about ways to maximize this current climate. Nikki offers suggestions on ways to get creative as you transition, and shares her advice on how to land the job you really want. Be sure to check out Nikki’s website below to access her free course. About today’s guest:   After 15+ years in HR leadership roles, Nikki Ryberg transitioned to become a Career Coach and Resume Writer. Nikki helps clients all over the US and Canada figure out what they want to do for a job or career and then how to best go about getting it, with a focus on search materials and mock interviews. Connect with Nikki on LinkedIn and visit her website to access her free course! Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for women and educating them on how financial strategies can impact their personal and professiona

Rhonda and Cheree talk openly about life as a busy Mom - whether you’re running your own business, or just managing your household, you CAN find balance. The key is to shift your perspective, know yourself, and take some time to think about what you value most. If you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed, (and who isn’t these days?) this episode will offer practical tips to make some changes.    About today’s guest:   Cheree Sauer is a Life and Mindset Coach for Momprenreneurs and has her own podcast, The Balanced Mompreneur. Her company, Heartfelt Mamas helps mompreneurs go from surviving to thriving in life, business and faith.   Her story; her words:    For 15 years, I was an Athletic Trainer with a Master's Degree in Sports Medicine where I helped athletes prevent and overcome injury and burnout. After having children, I found myself burnt-out from a demanding job and travel schedule. I took a leap of faith, quit my job and became a stay at home.    After 4 months of being a stay at home mom, I was depress

Today’s conversation is a first for us! Rhonda and Attorney Robert Taylor sit down to discuss what divorce looks like if you or your spouse serves in the military. Finding an attorney who specializes in this area is key as you navigate the rules and regulations of being a military couple. They tackle the topics:   Where should you get divorced? Housing and retirement Benefits   If you are in the military or married to someone who is, and contemplating divorce, this is a must listen episode!   About today’s guest:   Taylor Law & Mediation was started by attorney and mediator Robert J. Taylor in Mountain Home, Idaho, in 2013. The firm expanded to Boise, Idaho, in 2020 and offers the same quality service in both locations.    By focusing on mediation as a primary option and not a court of last resort, Taylor Law & Mediation provides a low-cost alternative to traditional litigation. Mediation is less expensive than litigation; it is often quicker and puts the participants in control of the final outcome

Rhonda’s guest today is Christine Cocchiola, Coercive Control Advocate, Educator, Researcher, & Survivor.   Rhonda and Christine tackle the difficult topic of Coercive Control - what it is, and how it affects you and your children. There are many forms of abuse, including in your finances. Christine offers practical tactics and strategies to keep you safe and supported.    About today’s guest:    Christine Cocchiola is a college educator and clinician in social work. She is an advocate for protective parents leaving an abusive relationship and/or trying to parent children who have grown up in the family dynamics of a coercive controller. Christine is a researcher of post separation abuse experiences of adult and child victims and currently obtaining her PHD at New York University. Ways to connect with Christine and access her resources:   Website   Instagram Your host is Rhonda Noordyk, CFEI, CDFA®, CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center   Rhonda has dedicated her career to being an advocate for

Are you wondering if mediation is right for you? Rhonda and Alison discuss the questions to ask yourself, your spouse, and your potential mediator before moving forward.    Mediation can be a great option but it’s important to know how the process works to know if it’s right for you and your family.  About today’s guest:   Family means everything to Alison, which is why she has dedicated herself to peacemaking in divorce and helping families restructure in the most amicable way possible.   Alison is a family mediator and attorney who enjoys working with clients, learning about their children and financial goals, and counseling them on their options so they can make informed decisions that are right for them and for their families.   She has written articles on the benefits of mediation and collaborative divorce for families, including on how these processes improve the mental health of children in divorce.   Alison is  an executive committee member of the Los Angeles County Bar Association's Family Law Sect

Rhonda sits down with Family Recovery Coach Lisa Smith to discuss how addiction affects the entire family. Lisa offers some practical ways to establish your own personal values and set healthy boundaries. Start by asking yourself, “What do I need right now?”   About today’s guest: Lisa Smith is a Certified Family Recovery Coach & Educator. She has lived experience with addiction in her own family and went in search for answers and a better way to connect, move forward and have influence when the resources being given to her were not working.  Lisa holds certifications in peer recovery coaching with a focus on family systems, CRAFT (community reinforcement and family training) and Invitation to Change. She supports families who are living with the disease of addiction in their lives to find the awareness and self-compassion for themselves to grow and heal, understand the neuroscience of addiction and why behaviors make sense in their loved ones and bring science and kindness together to connect and communi